Single mum 45k a year in south east but just scraping by?

[Plantball]

There was a time I once thought a household income after tax of 45k meant a comfortable life. I am a single mum of two young kids in the south east. Rent alone is 18k of the money gone. I feel like I’m merely existing. Running a car, council tax, gas, electricity, food, kids clothes, shoes, clubs…

The money just doesn't go far. I know I am fortunate compared so many and I’m not pleading poverty. Just feeling very flat at never being able to better our life.

yes, I later realised is not just salary income but a combination of things and the rent is totally horrible thing. Shuddering here, a single mother with kids. Should be fairer

What a lovely post. I'm sure the OP found it more heartwarming than the ridiculous "Just move then" posts. I know I did

But depending where you move, 10k a year less can still result in a better standard of living.

The SE is expensive, the options are accept it or move (we chose move).

You do have to be able to afford to move as well though. For example OP would need to save money for moving costs, deposit, minimum of a months rent, money to cover any gap in employment while moving. Many landlords would ask for 6 months rent up front or a guarantor from a single parent. OPs kids would have to move schools and potentially OP move jobs which isn’t as simple as ‘just move’. And if she could afford to save all that money she wouldn’t be complaining here in the first place.

£1500- £1700 is how much on average I manage to make around the school and childcare juggle. but obviously the increase in wage corresponds with the decrease in universal credit so it’s all relative. The examples I gave are just a rough figures as it essentially works out similar every month.

I also have to pay towards childcare during school holidays. Everytime I put a little aside it gets eaten up. £300 on fuel just goes. I’m in a village and swimming is a 30 min drive there and back. Work is a drive. Everything involves driving! I could move but we have a strong amazing network of friends here and I think I’d break if I left that.

I do spend extra on food but it’s literally our only luxury and i am a big believer in the impact of what you put in your body and your overall health. That £500 includes household stuff too. I don’t consider £125 a week a lot in regards to eating and washing products etc. We eat incredibly well. I don’t drink, have any hobbies or do anything else. I cook that’s it.

I don’t think 2k stretches far these days with all the bills and cost of raising children to have a reasonably decent childhood. Swimming alone (an essential skill) is £400 a term for both children

I’m on 66k in the south east, single parent and can’t afford to buy here. I have around 15 months until youngest of 3 finishes A levels and i’ve told my kids I am relocating back up north (one is there already) as I want to buy, and it’s so much cheaper up north, and I can easily change offices as I have a team up north. I have a few options where to move to, exciting times.

It sounds like a lot goes on bits here and there.

Obviously your rent is huge but you are on a decent income and should be able to manage.

400 per term for swimming seems very expensive/excessive are they private?

I live off something similar. Little slack. But I have quite a few one off costs to do with house maintenance. About to spend 700 on urgent issue and that totally throws it. Money goes nowhere now.

That’s what I pay. Well £200 for one child

works out £15per lesson. Usually 5 in a class v £10 a lesson and in a class

Kent is costly. I live there

least you get child maintenance from dad. I don’t

£200 sees a lot for ct if a small place and on own. Do you not get the 25% discount

i know
some on uc get a discount as well for ct. check to see if you are eligible

mine was 200 now 150 as single parent

I get you want nice food but £125 is a lot for 1 a and 2c

Swimming and kids clubs are a huge luxury. I grew up in a single parent family in the 80s/90s and there would never have been money for stuff like that.

Considering that you're only working part time and claiming UC, you seem pretty well off tbf.

@MidnightMeltdown

I have to agree! So many things are common now that are definitely a luxury in my view and then people wonder why they have no money.

Perhaps swimming lessons just arnt affordable right now with cost and petrol?

I think you sound very comfortably off tbh. How much do you think you need? Especially if not working full time !

Tbh, I'm surprised that someone already on 2.5k a month (including child maintenance) is able to claim as much as 1.2k universal credit on top.

We keep seeing headlines about kids in poverty, but UC seems pretty generous to me.

They are expected to live on £333. That is the single person amount per month for UC. Then you get money per child, plus money for/towards rent.

the child maintenance is not counted for benefit. The amount of UC will be based on the wages of 1.5k

If things are tight, I don’t think £400 a term on swimming lessons is essential. You work part time, take them both swimming after school (paying entrance fee) and teach them! Unless you are a complete non swimmer it’s not necessary all. Your ratio would be 1:2 much better than classes!

Also understand if your income is low enough to need topping up with benefits you are basically saying, I don’t earn enough to support myself and need help clothing and feeding my children (which is why the system is there quite rightly) Don’t then expect it to then cover middle class pursuits.

Nonsense!

Do you think flats exist on their own? The owners have mortgages, insurance, maintenance expenses, marketing expenses, and more.

Honestly the naïveté and entitlement of people these days is off the freaking charts.

Exactly. People on benefits who complain their lifestyle isn't cushy enough are beyond the pale.

Especially to those of us who take nothing (and never have) but get up and go to work every day to finance the imprudent. Beyond tiresome.