To think my sibling is being totally unreasonable about sleeping arrangements on this trip?

[jd206]

Posting here for traffic because I need to know if I’m being mad or if my sibling is just being ridiculous.

We (me, DH, DCs, my sibling, and their DP) are going on a family trip soon. It’s been planned for ages, all agreed and booked. We’re staying in a big Airbnb-type place with multiple bedrooms. The plan was that DH and I would have one room, DCs in another, and my sibling and their DP in the third. There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Now, sibling has suddenly decided that they don’t want to share a room with their DP because “they sleep badly together” (which is apparently news to everyone, including DP!). They’ve said they’ll be taking the box room instead, which means DP will now have to share with one of my DCs (who is 6 and not thrilled at the idea of sharing with an adult they barely know that well).

I told them that’s not fair and that they need to just suck it up and share with their DP as planned. They’re now saying I’m being unreasonable and need to be more flexible, and that the sleeping arrangements aren’t set in stone. But surely you don’t just unilaterally change things like this last minute?!

DM has now waded in and is backing sibling, saying I’m being selfish and that we should “find a compromise” (but what compromise? DH and I aren’t going to split up for the sake of their random issue).

So, AIBU to think my sibling is being totally unfair and should just stick to the original plan? Or am I missing something here?

TL;DR: Sibling suddenly refusing to share with their DP on a trip, wants to take the spare room, leaving their DP to bunk with my child. I’ve said no, now I’m the bad guy. Who’s BU here?

The OP has been banned by the sounds of things. Don't hold your breath. There will be no happy ending. No enlightenment. No epiphany. No solution to the conundrum.

Is this a Mensa puzzle…? If so, I’m failing badly.

Omg this made me howl 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Room 1:
The plan was that DH and I would have one room,

Room 2
DCs in another,

Room 3 and my sibling and their DP in the third.

Room 4 There’s also a small box room with a single bed, which was just going to be a spare in case anyone needed it.

Dp that’s in room 3 moves to box room.

It so obvious people. The siblings dp is scared of the monsters getting him and needs the 6 year old to protect him. That’s why an adult and child must sleep in the same room. Stay with it peeps.

You have to come back to all of us and explain how your siblings partner would end up sharing with your kids.
you and husband have a room
your kids have a room
your siblings partner has a room
then your sibling goes in the box room

we know for some reason you don’t want this box room used as a permanent room but how in that mix would a stranger end up in with your kids. You would just let your sibling use the box room before you would allow that.
Seems a waste of a box room tbh!

I agree with others that you are not making sense, op. There spare box room which was going to be used for emergencies could surely be used by sibling's partner unless it is the size of a cupboard with nowhere to put clothes.

Why can you not say brother or sister rather than sibling?

@jd206 - from your description we are all imagining these bedroom allocations. First sketch is your original plans. Second sketch is the new plan proposed by your sibling.

Why does one of your DCs (or both??) have to bunk up with your siblings DP? Why can't they just stay where they were originally allocated?

We're all VERY confused! Are you saying you have to put your kids in the same bed with your siblings DP so you can continue to have a 'just in case' empty spare room??? If so, why?! Just leave the arrangements as per the second sketch. No DC have to share with another adult, and nobody is without a bed.

If we're all misunderstanding your explanation, please clarify

Bonkers thread. Also massive safeguarding issue. Bizarre

This thread is so funny, please don't remove it!

Why not offer to share with dsis partner OP? That'd mean your dc can share with their dad and you get a change?

Sorry op you said there was a spare 4th room.... so sibling or her dp uses that to sleep in. Agree with others.... why does anyone have to bunk up with dc? I'm confused. Awaiting lightening bolt.....

*quoted wrong post argh!

Best post. Love the diagrams. Well done.

Your suggestion has a flaw. If the OPs goal was to have a spare bed, then she would be suggesting that her two kids share the double bed (originally reserved for sister and partner). And sisters partner takes a twin bed in a room on his own, hence leaving a spare twin bed as an emergency.

the fact she hasn’t suggested this means that the OPs motive was always to split up her kids. And the only way splitting up her kids now works is either:
option 1 - SisDP sharing with a kid (the OP is saying this)
1 - OP and DP (double)
2 - kid 1 and SisDP (twins)
3 - kid 2 (double)
4 - sister (single)

Option 2 - the OP and her DH ‘split up’. The IP also considered this but doesn’t want to do it
1 - OP and kid 1 (double)
2 - DP and kid 2 (twin)
3 - sisDP (double)
4 - sister (single)

what am i reading ?

@jd206
Im totally confused by your thread.
Who was meant to be in each room?
Who will be in each room if your sibling gets their way?

Is this one of those logic quizzy things. To test your problem solving ability?

This still doesn't make sense.

1 bedroom for you and your DP
1 for your DC
1 for your sister and her dp
1 spare box room

So now your sister is going in the box room, why can't her dp stay in the room they were going to have?

What are we all missing?

But they don’t have share with the DP? He has his original room, she has the spare box room, and your kids have their original?

Erm...

Why should your DC sleeping arrangements be disrupted?! You’re not even there yet

Put the DC in the spare bedroom 🤦‍♀️

good luck with that.

This is better than The Traitors when they all go nuts and vote off a Faithful. 🍿🍿🍿

Omg, that’s the only thing that makes sense. It also explains why op’s sibling suddenly decided that they didn’t want to share a bedroom with their partner. Having just come from a weekend away with couples who have children and where the bill was only split between the adults, (despite 40% of the bedrooms being needed for the children), I can understand the sibling’s furry!

Ooh, do we get to vote someone out?
OP's (presumably) sister
Sister's DP
Or the 6 year old?
Decisions, decisions!