To think this reaction is self absorbed.

[Mrsmozza123]

So. Everyone is fine but.
I went to check on my 4 year DS while he was sleeping. He'd taken his duvet out of the cover got inside the duvet cover and wrapped himself in it. I found him tangled and for a terrible split second I thought he could have strangled or suffocated. He was fine, a bit hot but definitely breathing and moving. Thank goodness.
I called my DH for help a few times and he shouted back "Yes?".
Eventually once I knew DS was safe I went downstairs to tell DH what had happened. I was really shaken.
DH seemed more concerned that i was having a go at him for not coming upstairs. I really wasn't.
I was expecting him to hug me or say thank goodness he's OK, to share my concern.

Instead he was saying "well you didn't sound very panicked, how was it supposed to know you needed me?"
And
"Sounds like you've just come downstairs to have a go at me"
I just walked off, I've had a little cup of tea and a cry on my own because I can't sleep.

OP I absolutely understand you .
It sounds like quite a scene where your 4 year old had got themselves in an absolute state tangled up in their duvet cover .
To have red marks on their neck ? shows just how tangled they were !
I think I’d have had a temporary panic if I’d found the same happened to one of my 3 children.
I think you sorted it fairly calmly by the sounds of things because if you’d really shouted or panicked then surely your husband would have come running up ?
You told husband, he feels guilty, has turned this around on you .
He has completely minimised your feelings .
All husband needed to do was say “ oh god what a fright “
I myself can be completely rational, completely calm about all sorts of things that would really be difficult for many others …but if I’m a bit unwell 🤧 I get very teary indeed .
Hope you’re ok now xx
Also maybe think about one of those duvets you get , think they’re called coverless duvets ?
they wash and dry very quickly and no more tangled up child

i commented without getting this far in the thread oops .
my comment was very supportive of you .
glad you’ve had some understanding xx
I have been in similar situations where all feelings are minimised and someone had “ checked out “ and that’s tough xx