DD demanding chocolate when she's on her period

[Homeymum2]

My 14 yo DD insists that all her friends parents buy them chocolates and pamper them when they are cycling -

I'm being told I'm a terrible mum and badgered for chocolates

Am I an outlier to not cater to this?

There's actually absolutely nothing wrong with taking it easy, eating chocolate and resting more than usual a couple of days a month. You can do that regardless of whether you have a period or not, as it happens, but if you happen to be dealing with cramps, even more reason to step back from the cult of productivity for the day.

@MrsSunshine2b increased sugar intake does impact periods negatively, actually.

Thank you for this.
Sadly ‘MrsSunshine2b’ isn’t preparing her DD for the real world, and getting on with normal day to day activities during her period is hardly “sacrificing her health”. What an exaggeration. Absolutely ridiculous.
I too had very painful heavy periods which led to a hysterectomy after being diagnosed with adenomyosis. However life didn’t stop during my period, I had a living to earn, bills to pay, children to care for and a home to run… in other words real life.
Women don’t want to be seen as the weaker sex, so why they bleat and make a big deal over theirs and their DD’s monthly period is bizarre.

100% correct, and sugar highs and lows increase PMS too

OK well that's good to know. I still crave chocolate on my period and still feel absolutely no guilt about eating it and relaxing on day 1. And @LifeReallyIsTooShort if you think resting for one day a month, when you are in severe pain, makes you weak, then I feel really sorry for you.

I think if she was miserable and needed cheering up in ANY situation I’d buy her chocolate, although not if she demanded it. And I hope she’d do the same for me (she does, we do it for each other) but as another poster said, periods are a normal part of life for a girl, whether we like it or not, she needs to deal with them, and if like my own daughter they are extremely heavy/painful then you should seek medical assistance.

Many young people are not educated and brought up with the coping mechanisms for real life these days. Statistics show that the current generation is the most stressed and anxious when compared with other past generations because they are not supported to build an inner strength and adopt a ‘can do’ attitude to ‘get up and get on with it’.
What happens in the future when they have responsibilities and need to stand on their own two feet? bills to pay, a home to run, the necessity to hold down a full time job so they can pay their way in life, is their employer going to be sympathetic when a female employee takes to their bed to watch Netflix with a bar of galaxy and a hot water bottle for two days every month? They might pretend to be, but in reality repeated sick leave in todays climate leads very quickly unemployment, employers find a way of letting people go without giving the real reason.
Do your DD a favour, for her sake raise her to have inner strength, a positive belief system and a strong mind to face real life rather than a ‘poor me’ attitude, and I honestly do mean this in the nicest possible way.

At no point did I say that I'd keep her in bed with Netflix. However, if she wants to get home from school and curl up on the couch and eat chocolate instead of going out then that's absolutely fine by me.

If you want to teach yours to burn themselves out then go for it.

Well back in the 1980s I had to take time off work (and leave the office mid way through the day) because the first two days of my period was so unbearable and the pain had me on the floor doubled over in agony. I’m of the ‘boomer’ generation.

@BunnyLake that speaks to the fact that in the past “women’s issues” weren’t taken seriously. No woman should have to endure that on a regular basis.

My step daughter was really struggling in a similar way last year, I strongly encouraged that she go to the doctor with her mum and if her mum wasn’t able, I’d go with her. I was never asked to go and she seems to have had a better time of it since, so I can only assume they did go. Not my business what was said, but I’m glad she’s had a better time of it since.

I think sone chocolate treat is one thing

being pampered is another

doesn’t she have her own pocket money though?

I used to have period pain so bad I'd often pass out with pain. I had all the investigations, including a laproscopy, and they couldn't find anything. Labour was less painful than some of my periods, and I was induced, which is supposed to be worse. Since having my baby though, they've not been anywhere near as bad. The only explanation I got from a midwife was that sometimes the muscles that cause the contractions are really strong and can cause a lot of pain, and maybe they got stretched out by pregnancy. I don't know why that would be as I don't have strong muscles anywhere else. There's not always a good reason.

No I never went to the doctor for it, it wouldn’t have occurred to me back then as I assumed I had no choice but to endure it (no googling for advice back then). I only got relief from it when I had a full hysterectomy at forty nine.

Actually I have just remembered that sometime in 90s I did go and see a doctor and I was eventually told I had some big fibroids. They couldn’t remove them though (I can’t remember if I was told they were the cause). I guess they must have got removed in the hysterectomy but that was done early 2011. Finally I was free from periods 🙏🏼

Well I don't have a daughter, but if I did I would pamper her when she is struggling.

Sometimes it's okay not to be okay! Plenty of time to be on your own two feet dealing with the trials and tribulations of this shit world.