DH constantly making lewd graphic comments

[CucumberSandcastle]

All the bloody time! If we are chatting about something ordinary or I ask him about what he wants to do tomorrow etc he will make an extremely lewd comment about what he wants to do to me - like I cannot wait to plough your you know what or lewd comments about sexualised stuff he wants to do to me etc. Not even remotely related to anything we are talking about- basically says the most shocking/highly graphic things he can think of with a guffaw. He has a habit for saying outlandish stuff so often that coming from anyone else would be highly shocking but as he says it all the time it’s become normal if that makes sense?

Its a huge bloody turn off 👎

He says in while laughing in an almost playful way but it’s constant!

(TMI I know but he says oh I just want to destroy your an$! or I want to plough your sloppy m!nge 🤮) It’s gross I know. I try to ignore him or just say WTF to him.

He’s a “zany” off the wall type of character and his weirdness initially attracted me to him but this is just too much.

He was close to being diagnosed with bipolar disorder (he didn’t attend his follow ups) and I’ve heard about hyper sexuality and it being one of the symptoms?

Mine does it too but I love it 😂 till I'm on my period then it makes me feel sick, I have to be super honest how it makes me feel

OP, him being sexually inappropriate verbally in front of your children is emotional abuse.

I strongly advise you to contact Women's aid.

Time he leaves.

Check his hard drive. He's obviously been watching too much porn.

It goes too far and is not "banter" when not both people enjoy it. You’ve told him you don’t enjoy it so why does he continue doing it? He sounds like a self-centred, immature twat.

Every bully says "Oh it’s only banter, haven’t you got a sense of humour?"

He sounds vile. I can’t imagine why you would want to be with him.

Utterly gross.

Well stop playing along and tell him what a revolting pig he is

Where are all these vile men coming from lately?
Were their fathers the same?

I'm not clear about the timeline but: you have children, he refused a follow up appointment for bipolar, and every time he talks to you it's revoltingly sexualised? You say he's lost his libido but this endless drizzle of sex talk means that something is going on.

This is absolutely not normal, sounds like both a MH problem and he's being a turd with it. None of the possible explanations justify his behaviour or make it safe and OK for you or for your children. It's quite disturbing.

You have children. You need to think about protecting them from all this, as well as yourself.

Your children deserve to not be exposed to this sort of unacceptable behaviour op, the longer you stay the more normalised it becomes and then you are equally to blame.

You need to take action here, sooner rather than later please.

What advice did you receive last time?

'You may want to destroy my anus Bob, but is it worth destroying our marriage over? Quite honestly if you don't stop this disgusting language about me I will seek to divorce you.
And if you say anything inappropriate in front of our children again you will be leaving the same day'

Well that's what I'd say if I wanted to stay with him (which I wouldn't btw, he sounds gross and immature)

It is interesting that he does this more when there is something serious to discuss. He doesn't want to take or share responsibility for your family by the sounds of it.

If anybody said sloppy minge to me I'm not sure I could ever be in the same room as them again

This sounds like bipolar and sounds like he’s not on the right medication. This is not normal. I would give him an ultimatum that he stops these comments and gets proper medical help now or you’re done. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.

Porn addled misogynistic prick.

Absolutely disgraceful way to speak to your partner.

A man would only say that once to me, it would be over.

This is so far beyond grim. (And there's no way he's got phrases like that without watching porn).

Everything would have slammed shut here long ago and he'd be out.🤮🤮🤮🤮

I couldn't stand that OP. He sounds like a horrible, suggestive , rude, filthy mouthed git .

That's sick that he says these things in front of your children , poor kids. You owe it to them as a mother to put a stop to this behavior, what if one of them repeated what he says to you , in school or to one of their friends ?!

It's going to go terribly well when your kids start telling their friends and teachers they're going to plough their sloppy minges, isn't it?

OP, this kind of behaviour is only associated with brain damage. Maybe somebody with bi-polar could be like it in the manic phase, but I've known a lot of highly manic patients (many in treatment for 'sex addiction') and none of them went around acting like Viz characters.

Since you asked, no, it's not normal and neither is it banter.

He evidently does use porn because that's where the violently misogynistic comments you're outlined come from.

It's very weird that you're putting up with it.

What’s the matter with you that you have to ask whether this is okay? It absolutely isn’t. Get your DC away from this revolting excuse for a man before they start mimicking him 🤮

"That will be £2.85 please."

"I want to plough..."

Gross 🤢

Reminds me of Luke in Married at First Sight, who wrote a 'love' letter that included the sentence "When you were cooking I wish I got down on my knees and terrorised your bumhole".

Have you tried telling him that you are utterly repulsed by this behaviour and if he doesn't stop you will divorce him?

How did this man ever make it to husband OP?

He should have been thrown back way before kids.

Well, we're all telling you this is NOT normal. And he clearly doesn't respect you or he wouldn't start his dirty talk when you discuss serious matters. Sounds like a teenager to me (an immature, rude one). How responsible is he in other domains ; does he work? Does he behave at work? With the children ?

What are you going to do when one of your kids repeats some of his inappropriate talk to others?

He is revolting
Some antidepressants can cause erratic behaviour/ hypomania which could be a factor so I'd tell him to see his GP
You might think he's a repressed catholic but I think he's a porn addict
It's absolutely not normal
What is his job? If he acted like this at work he would be sacked so I guess he can act normally ghere