… for married couples, to ask what age you stopped having sex?

[Thowawayname]

To give some context, I’m early-mid 40s, married almost 20 years, one DD just started at Uni. I’d say we’ve always had a good relationship, no financial issues and very comfortable, good careers , so I feel very very fortunate in the grand scheme of things.

My question for married or long term couples is what age you stopped having sex?

And adding more detail…

I had some health issues a few years ago, early onset menopause and now really have close to zero libido. HRT is not an option.

I continue to have sex with DH, but we’ve never really discussed my libido issue. I enjoy the closeness. I also know what he likes, and I like pleasing him if that makes sense. I deliberately take the initiative too sometimes, and do make an effort … you know what I mean :) But at the end of the day, it feels like a job, like gardening (which I don’t enjoy), or cooking ( which I don’t enjoy) or emptying the dishwasher!!

I guess that bottom line is I’d be happy to not have sex again, not just DH, but with anyone.

I can’t really ask many people this in RL. My only sibling is 12 years older than me, and she’s still very active, or so she says.

I have some upcoming sessions with a recommended therapist with expertise in this area. This has helped me in other situations in the past. So I’m not especially asking for advice here, just the age question really.

Apologies for the long rambling post.

I am nearly 52 husband nearly 56, still active, mainly once a week, my issue is I go to bed at 10 and he wants to stay up and have a drink watch some TV, but we go away 4 times a year and are more active then

Well then they are one with VERY outdated knowledge.

Yes this is what I use

A what?

How rude.

After about 5 years, I found I no longer needed full on HRT, but I did suffer with vaginal dryness, vulva soreness and itching, so have continued on with vaginal oestrogen (Vagifem). I’m 66 in a few months and there are no plans to stop this. Even for systemic HRT, I’m pretty sure it can be continued. if you see someone with greater knowledge of it. If you need it, ask for a second opinion. I know of a woman in her 70s still taking it.

@winfongdown

@Scarletjay
My g.p is also a gynacolasist.

A what

Come on. You know what they meant. I do question why people who can use MN don't also use an online dictionary but there you go.

Why?

@StrikeAlways I now of many women in their 70s still taking it and I will be one too.

know

If I’d needed to continue, I would be too 👍

I’m 70. Lost interest in sex with husband. Definitely menopause played a part but also DH’s behaviour. Then he died 6 years ago and I rediscovered my libido big time! Now having the best sex ever.

Me too. Not depressing at all, it’s liberating. I don’t plan on ever having it again and I feel I’ve had more than enough sex to last a couple of lifetimes.

Didn’t realise thread is a bit old (ish).

I had a hysterectomy in my 40`s and was put on HRT (estrogen only). That was 25 years ago and I'm still on it. Every 5 years I attempt to stop using it but after a few weeks all the awful menopause symptoms return, the worst being brain fog and hot flushes. My partner and I still enjoy sex on a weekly basis.