Will we lose our home ? Should I lose a husband

[Derrygirl09]

Hi everyone 👋
I'll try and keep this short , we bought our first house 3 years ago , since then , me and my husband had a separation of 9 months , things had been bad tbh and I never would have bought a home with him but we found ourselves in need of somewhere new to live and had the means to buy a home , anyway , we decided to work through our issues and things have been going well since Christmas... Today I found letters he has hidden from me from land and property and turns out he has never paid the rates , like ever 🥺, we agreed that he would be responsible for them and he's told me numerous times they were paid for , we now owe 1000s and we honestly don't have the money., he's ignored the last letter that would have given him the option to pay off in installments, he's been working overtime every weekend for 5 months and I also buy all food , all school meals , all kids clothes ect I worked out he should have few hundred left at the end of the month after the bills he pays NOT Inc overtime ,and now he tells me NOW he tells me he couldn't afford it 😡 have I a right to be livid , and what will happen to the home now ? Is this unforgivable to you ?

I should add I never actually left the home in those 9 months I couldn't find anywhere I could afford

I’d be fucking fuming! 😡

It's not going to get any better. Get out now whilst you're young enough to enjoy a life.

Wtf? Lying bastard. What a shock.

Call them and explain, beg them for a chance to begin a payment plan.

Lose the husband.

He is clearly lying re not being able to afford it. The money is either funding gambling or drugs or something along those lines. He has put the roof over your head in jeopardy through utter stupidity and negligence and that should be a deal breaker.

Does what you owe on rates outweigh your equity in the house?

Do you have any idea where the money has gone?

Sorry for the stupid question what are rates?

YANBU but what is he spending his money on?

Rates are from before council tax - how many years are we going back 20 or more for sure edit guess you are not in England

Are you in Northern Ireland?

What are rates? What is it he hasn’t been paying?

https://www.stepchange.org/debt-info/rates-arrears.aspx

You should still be able to arrange a payment plan to pay off the debt. I’m not in uk but our rates are very reasonable about payment plans and happy to accept a very small amount each week as it’s working towards paying it off.

I agree with this approach. If you haven’t already, call them tomorrow morning and explain the whole situation. Don’t wait, or bury your head in the sand.
Speak to DH about where the money has gone. Insist he logs into his bank account to show you. Definitely sever ties with him asap.

Def call them, tell them you've discovered they've not been paid. You want to arrange payment by installments, set it up to come our of his account.

Whilst that's ongoing, put the house on the market to get rid of it and him, sadly you'll be joint and several for the rates, so you'll have to cough up half unless you can twist his arm and he agrees it's on him.

Get shut of him, find a new place and live your best life. What an AH he is.

Depends, it sounds like he is working every hour...so if there genuinely is extra cash floating around where is it going? What is the breakdown of income/costs for both of you?

Can you sell up? Is there equity? Children to consider?

If the LPS hasn't started debt recovery proceedings, contact them tomorrow and discuss a payment plan. If they have started debt recovery proceedings you will need to pay the full amount before the hearing date or it will go to court. Take out a loan if necessary. Check to see if you are or would have been entitled to rate relief during the past 3 years. Has the mortgage definitely been getting paid?

Hi I'm new to this so don't know how to reply individually, im in Derry , what I pay is more than what he's responsible for , he earns more than me without the extra overtime money , hes always worked hard and always been skint apparently, never understood were money goes , it's been left to him because that's what we decided, i thought it was easier for him to pay mortgage and rates and I'd take care of monthly club costs for kids , any holidays , school meals , uniforms , Christmas , food , electric, TV licence ect he's bad with money so I just told him to set up direct debits , I don't think that is it being left up to him he had 2 jobs , mortgage and insurance, rates , I pay off the kitchen , I pay off Argos card , I pay off the sofa , I paid the plumber ect ect ect ! Yes the mortgage is paid , he's also quite bit older than me and just said he wanted to be responsible for that .. I let him because tbh that's much easier than what I pay , I've constantly have money for clubs and swimming and electric and food every week, we've never had a joint bank account, like I said he's bad with money so I thankfully made the right decision to keep our bank accounts separate,believe me I got the short straw, but it's not even he's paying more or I am tbh it's not saying anything about it that's the real issue , I would have cut back to make the rates as much as I could have ,I would have sorted it tbh like I always do 😡

Apparently there's a huge amount of unpaid rates in NI this year.They will take you to court and that creates additional expenses so I'd contact them asap.

Rates are the equivalent of Council Tax in the U.K. I believe

Okay, if you're in Northern Ireland you don't go to prison for not paying Rates, whereas in England not paying Council Tax can land you in prison. So there's that at least.

Can you call tomorrow and ask to set up a payment plan? Or call a debt charity for advice?

Your DH will need to hand over access to his bank statements though, as a priority.