SIL getting upset over something I said to my DOG

[Poitoi]

I recently spent a day with SIL, brother and their wedding planner. I am best woman and have quite a lot of responsibilities. It was intense but productive - we actually had a laugh.

Anyway, we went to my parents’ house after the day of planning. Here SIL heard me fussing over my dog who I hadn’t seen at all that day. At some point I said something along the lines of “Oh I missed you. A day without you is a day wasted in my book” to my dog. Obviously over the top and non-serious, I was just being silly with my dog.

Brother has since told me that SIL was really offended by this comment and is hurt. I just find that ridiculous. I told SIL on the way to my parents I had had a lovely time. I think dog people will see I was just being ott. My dog was being all snuggly and excited to see me so I just played into it.

AIBU?

SiL needs to get a grip for being offended by a comment someone made to their dog that was never for their ears anyway.

Imagine hearing someone talk nice to their dog, and you feel the need to confront them? Ridiculous.

YABU and ridiculous

You obviously did want to be with your dog so I'm not sure why you agreed to be best woman if giving up a Saturday was too much for you

I am not a dog person and I absolutely wouldn't bat an eyelid at you saying that if I was your SIL. It wouldn't even register as being in any way linked to the day we'd just had or you expressing any view on the time we'd had together.

It's just one of those silly things people say to animals but don't mean literally, isn't it? Like "oh you're my baby", nobody takes that as you actually thinking you gave birth to Rover.

Nonsense, she said it in front of the SIL, so it wasn’t just for the dogs ears only

The SIL did not confront her, read the post before you post such nonsense

That is how I have read it too.
But a lot of MN folks fucking hate dogs and their owners even more. I am not surprised at the hate OP is getting.

Thays not the same as saying it was a wasted day.

More nonsense, I love dogs but still think the OP was in the wrong here, why are you presuming people who are commenting are dog haters….it has nothing to do with the innocent dog, he/she had no part to play in this….ridiculous comment

I love dogs and I think she's a self centred person who is playing faux pretence thar she wasn't being a bitch
Hope that helps

I could have the best day of my life and I would still come home and say to my dog that a day without him is a day wasted. It‘s really not that deep

I think your SiL is being ridiculous, OP. But since you (I assume) love your brother, I think the apology text is a good idea.

Yes, your SIL is being a little over sensitive and I could imagine saying something similar to any of my 3 dogs. But as someone with 2 SILs who I love very much and get on really well with but who can also be a mixture of dramatic, emotional, reactionary and precious, especially when drink is involved, I would call or send a quick text acknowledging the lovely day you had and apologising in case the daft doggy speak upset her. The long term relationship is more important than your principles here.

Lots more of I me and my.

OP says she was at her parent's house. Her SiL overheard her talking to her dog. Or was she meant to whisk her dog away to a different room so SiL could not over hear?

Where did OP say she purposely talked to her dog in front of her SiL? Oh, nowhere. The real scenario here is dog probably walked into the room and OP spoke to them.

I take my dog to cafes. I sit there and tell her she is the most beautiful thing in my eyes, is it reasonable for anyone hearing me to think that means I am saying they are ugly? Because that is how the SiL in this scenario is coming across.

It's a mean comment to make in fro t of someone you spent the day with.
I I.agine the dog doesn't understand or gaf
But SIL does.

Nah, SiL is being a bitch. My own sis is the same. Makes everything about her... even comments aimed at the dog.

Agree, she just can’t accept that she may have caused offence, it’s coming across in all her posts, sounds like a very unlikeable woman

You’ve hurt her feelings and probably ruined what was supposed to be a nice day. You now know this. Whether you meant it or not.

But instead of being empathetic, and understanding her point of view and apologising, you’ve doubled down and slated her as having ‘main character energy’ (which is ironic).

Why be that bitchy and stubborn? This woman is going to be part of your family. I feel sorry for her.

Op has made everything about her. She drank wine and did arts and crafts that she likes and therefore whatever she does and says is fine regardless of how other people feel.

She can. She just doesn't care.

I am talking from my perspective…

Her SiL is jealous of dog. FFS.

Another irrelevant comparison.

Oh don’t be ridiculous, there is a reason people like you love your dogs so much, you can’t get along with humans, and dogs don’t confront you on your nasty behaviour

I know a very difficult woman, sounds very much like you, she has no friends left as has fallen out with everyone so has now got herself a couple of dogs

You keep saying things like obviously and clearly but it’s obvious to you because you know what you intended, you don’t seem to realise that it can come over differently to other people. I would have taken that specific phrase as passive aggressive too, as it’s a rather odd thing to say.

Well I shared those details because posters were saying I obviously don’t like SIL and didn’t have a
goof time. Not true.

Drinking wine, picking wedding linens are objectively fun. Even more so for me as it aligns with my interests