To be upset with my boyfriend over this ?

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Hi I 25 f have been with my partner 37m for 4 years now. We’ve both been so busy at work apart from a couple days off at Christmas and it was our first weekend together.

This morning we were on the sofa watching telly and I went to hug him. He said ‘ergh great are you gonna hug me again and kiss me - it’s getting really annoying’ I got up made a tea and went upstairs to our bedroom I was upset. But didn’t show it.

I got a text from Royal Mail saying they’d delivered a gift I got for him. I purchased it last week because I wanted to treat him. It was a big bag of his favourite pick n mix. Anyway I went to get it as they’d left it outside and I came in and said that I’d got him these and he said ‘well it’s not even my birthday , have I had all my birthday presents now? , great’

This may be childish but I just burst into tears and quickly went back upstairs. He followed me up and saw me crying and said ‘Actually do you know what I can’t be bleeped to make you feel better I’m going out for a cigarette and a walk I need space from you, you’re a joke’

I’m really upset I don’t know what to think. He always says he loves me usually and that he’s so happy but now I feel like it’s a lie and I feel he’s secretly always annoyed at me or I get under his skin as he just completely changed today.

Also I never mention this to him but I also see no sign of a proposal . I thought after 4 years he would have thought about it but nothing. I never ask him about marriage or proposals but I have found myself thinking about it. He usually seems really happy with me. He is quite a cold man until you get to know him and then he has a softer side.

Any advice ? I feel sad 😭

thank you xx

You are young. He is a complete twat. Leave and find someone who is actually a nice guy. You deserve better

This man doesn’t like you at all. No person who loves and enjoys your company doesn’t act like this. The behaviour is common when someone is playing away. Best of luck.

Leave. If this is how he’s treating you now, like you are worthless and meaningless, imagine how it will escalate once he has you ‘trapped’ in a marriage? Vulnerable with a small baby?

Also worth thinking about: where do you think your low self-esteem has come from? I would be definitely pursuing counselling to work on boundaries and building healthy relationships after you’ve left him.

What are the logistics of leaving him? What do you need to sort out? Please start taking the steps you need. You’re so young, don’t waste any more time with this horrible man.

This will NOT get better, leave now! Don’t waste your love and affection on someone so undeserving.

Sounds like he might be trying to engineer a guilt free break up. Treating you like shit so you dump him.

This is my thought too.

I had no idea Pick n Mix could be bought online. Useful to know.

You want a proposal from THIS THING? U deserve better.

Lots of comments about this and that he doesn't like the OP much, as if it is something she needs to have been aware of a long time ago and given up on.

It is, but the behaviour is because he is a dreadful person, A terrible person. A decent person may be "not that into you" or perhaps not like someone very much, but wouldn't act in this way towards someone else. I can't stand one of my work colleagues but I'm not nasty to her. I just work out ways to avoid her, strategically book meetings and wfh days around her schedule!

This man is a rat and should be out on his arse now.

I personally think this is "mans talk". If this behaviour has just suddenly started, its his way of communicating that the relationship is over. For whatever reason, he just can't have a conversation with you and tell you it's over. He will instead display this behaviour towards you until you either flip and cause a scene or just walk away quietly. Either way, he gets the result he wants without actually telling you what he wants.
Typical form of male communication.

You deserve better. He's immature and it seems that he doesn't care about you or your feelings.You deserve better.

At close to 40 myself and many mistakes under my belt I'll tell you now LEAVE this is just the start! have some self respect and know your worth he doesn't love you it sounds like he barely tolerates you .
Don't be dragged back by the fake apologies and promises to do better he's show you who he really is so believe him , could you imagine subjecting a poor child in the future to this awful man ?

Get rid, he sounds like an ah you deserve better.

Hope you sat and ate all the sweets in front of him!

Believe him when he says he can’t be arsed with you.

It’s surprising to hear about long-running transportation services shutting down after so many years. Changes in the travel and transportation industry have clearly affected many companies. I recently read about Airways Transit Closingi and how the company ended its operations after more than five decades of service. It really shows how competitive the airport transport industry has become and how businesses must constantly adapt to survive.

My advice is that he's dating a younger woman to avoid commitment.

When you're his age you'll see how pathetic it is that he's such a waster and not moving forward in life.

Bin him before he bins you as its going that way. Xx