Leaving an 8yo home alone

[Polkadotbabushka]

My niece told me today that when her mum drops her dad to work and picks him up… so twice a day, they leave her at home. It’s a 15 minute journey if no traffic so half an hour twice a day.

She is quite immature for her age and is apparently left with the tablet to keep her company!

When I approached my DH about it he said he knew as his sister had already told him it’s just easier.

I just couldn’t do that. My son is a year younger and actually more mature than her but I wouldn’t dream of it.

what do others think?

It's illegal. I think you need to act. This is not ok.

Thats not ok

Why not just put the child in the car?????

That is neglect. We were never left home alone until we were in our teens! And that was back in the 90s and early 2000s.

This is really irresponsible. What if they had a car accident or something happened to significantly delay them? Or a fire started at home or the child took ill? She's far too young to be left alone everyday.

There is no legal age

It’s not illegal but what if they got into a car accident or something and weren’t home in 15 minutes, would the kid even know what to do?

There is no legal min age to leave a child at home alone in England but it isn’t some thing I would do. That been said in middle
school areas children start walking to school by themsleves at the end of yr 4 and some of them will only be 8.

It is not illegal.

There's no legal age but 8 is ridiculous. Anything could happen.

I am glad it isn’t only me who was annoyed about it. There are other things they do that annoy me but nothing that massively amounts to neglect! My DH said it’s none of our business so we can’t intervene I just feel sad for her. She’s back to school tomorrow so it will be only once a week on a Saturday then.

I was shocked when google said no legal age!

Nope, at 8 throw them in a car, on a tablet if needs be.

All that's in my head is those boys that died in the house fire in London because they were left alone.

As PPs have said, there are no ages in British law about this and that's b/c different children can cope at different ages. Some 16s cannot be left alone.

However, most people do make an arrangement for primary aged children to be supervised.

For those saying what if DPs were in a car accident, surely that is an argument for sparing DC by leaving him/her at home?

Ideally, DNiece knows what to do. Maybe ask her more about this and encourage your SiL to give her lots of instructions?

It’s not illegal but half an hour twice a day is a lot.

I would find a way to check that your niece has a list of numbers to call if her parents aren’t back by X time, and that she knows not to answer the door and how to call emergency services.

I don’t think it’s necessarily neglect - some children might hate sitting in the car that long, and their parents might argue - assuming the child was sensible - they were better off playing at home, but if she’s just on her iPad (which isn’t optimal for an hour either) she may as well be in the car.

Accidents happen.

Not just to the child, she might be totally fine .. but some nut hits the car her parents are in and they're now dead...
What happens to the kid?
How long till she's panicking? Would she know what to do? How long till someone thinks about her and helps her?

This sounds over the top perhaps.. but it's what would be going through my mind.

I'd speak to the sister and say your niece has told you and she doesn't like being left on her own but didn't want to say to her mum and in future could she take her with her. The niece telling you is a little cry for help - try and tactfully explain this to her mum without making it sound like you think it's wrong - more that niece had told you and that she would rather go with her mum.

I think my concern is whether the child would know what to do in an emergency and if they have any means of calling someone. They might be occupied on their tablet, but do they have access to a phone? Know who to call if needed?

There's no legal age to be left alone, but it is illegal to leave a child in a situation that endangers them.

I think it's quite likely someone leaving an 8 year old alone while they drive off somewhere would be considered to be endangering them.

True but as it also says…

There is no legal age limit for leaving a child on their own, but it's an offence to leave a child alone if this puts them at risk. Parents/carers can be prosecuted for neglect if it is judged that they placed a child at risk by leaving them home alone.

https://www.nidirect.gov.uk › leav...
Leaving children at home alone | nidirect

Leaving an eight year old alone to handle an unpredictable emergency is ludicrous.

You can intervene just not with your sister. If you genuinely think the child is at risk you need to act.

I wouldn't leave my 8 year old at home alone. However my now 10 year old shows enough maturity to be left for very short periods. I can never imaging leaving my now 8 year old alone even when she hits 10. They are such different people.

8 is definitely too young to be left alone. If there was an accident no-one would know she was there alone. Totally inappropriate to do this.

School safeguarding team would be most unhappy to hear this...

That’s too young and I would be concerned this would become a more regular gig given the fact it is already twice a day.

No, it's not.

It's not ok but also, no one is going to do anything about it.
It would come under neglect if she hurts herself having been left alone but until then it's just a (poor) parenting decision. You commenting will get you called a busy body but they aren't likely to change their behaviour

The risk is more to the parents in the car than the child at home. If she has access to a phone / can use the tablet to contact someone then that is a bonus.

I wouldn’t mind my business tbh- bloody stupid people need telling.