To think this Tesco worker was a bit OTT?

[Newfamilyhome]

Perhaps I've taken it the wrong way and he was trying to be helpful but it came across a bit condescending if I'm honest.

So, I've just popped into Tesco's for some oil for my car. For context, I top the oil up regularly (not a leak, the car just drinks the stuff) so I'm fully capable of doing it myself. I've messed around with cars for years and see it as a bit of a hobby. Anyway, went to the self scan and the man came over to take the tag off then asked me if the oil light had come on. I said yes and carried on scanning my shopping whilst he stood there and said "make sure you don't put it in whilst the engine is hot and under no circumstances do not put it in whilst the engine is on". I just nodded and said "yes thanks for your help". I was trying to be polite and hoped that he would take the hint that I didn't need any advice.

He then continued "Make sure you wait until the morning before you put it in otherwise the engine might overheat and you could crash into someone else killing them or yourself". I did start to get a bit irritated at this point and said "yes thank you, I top it up regularly so I know how to do it". His reply was "maybe you should ask your parents to do it for you". Not that it matters but I'm 30 years old!! He then asked me what car I had and told me to get rid of it immediately and buy something else 😂

I felt quite flustered by the end and just wanted to get out of the shop. I'm not sure why he felt the need to give me this unsolicited advice tbh, maybe because I'm a woman?

AIBU?

Essentially he is saying that even though he is not a mechanic and you have not asked his professional opinion about topping up car oil, he obviously must impart his wisdom because he is a man and you are merely a woman.

@CurbsideProphet I agree. I had to stop myself from laughing when he told me to ask my parents.

Sounds like peak Man-splaining to me!

Tedious old goat 🙄

Wow! this is some serious mansplaining 🤨🙄

What would us poor meek women do without these beacons of wisdom we have been blessed with

See this proper boils my piss.

I would have told him not to give car advice because he could get sued if his advice endangers someone 🤣

Pretend you're going back to your car to grab a notepad so you can write down his pearls of wisdom then just drive off.

I hate random mansplaining. I’m of the belief it should be called out in a polite way. I was in the gym and went to use the kettle bells. I set them all up and before I even got a chance to use them some young lad came over and told me how to swing and that I need to “pop my hip” and keep the control in my arms. He was right, but I said “I appreciate your helping me but I’ve been doing kettle bells for longer than you’ve been alive and I don’t need it, please don’t assume women are feckless with these things”. He did looked embarrassed and said “Oh sorry I didn’t know if you’d know what you were doing” 🙄

Yes, textbook mansplaining! It’s a wonder he didn’t offer to do it himself to make sure you didn’t endanger anyone!

So no leak but needs topping up? Is it making mayonnaise in your oil filter?

This reminds me of last summer when I was queueing to pay for fuel and the poor woman in front of me said “I’ve fucked up and put diesel in my petrol how can I fix it” and the man over the counter said “I’m sorry I can’t give you advice, I’m not allowed as I’d apparently be liable, but would you like a KitKat. Here I’m pointing at the KitKats. You should look very carefully at the KitKats, right here, see”. Next to the KitKats was a business card for the people who can come and sort the problem. Bless her she was so frazzled she didn’t clock on ant anll kept saying “I don’t WANT an KitKat” 🤣 and I picked a card up and gave it to her. The bloke told me afterwards he wasn’t even allowed to hand her a card or tell her they existed as the weren’t a Morrisons service, which is why he had to do the farcical KitKat pointing

Agree with all the above on it sounding like a typical man 😂 … but then the other side of me thinks this could possibly be someone with autism who perhaps just doesn’t understand the social norms 🤷🏻‍♀️ (my autistic cousin does stuff like this a lot and comes from a good place but his brain just can’t comprehend that someone doesn’t need to hear it!)

I had a bloke explain parking meters to me recently while I was getting a ticket on a meter I use daily.

Some blokes just can't help themselves.

I get the mansplaining, I had it with a washing machine repair man once. But maybe this Tesco guy was on the spectrum? Someone I work with is autistic and he always feels the need to lecture (when it's not wanted).

Yeah he sounds autistic, getting fixated on you and your car and being safe. But could also be mansplaining!

Patronising git. The 'Thanks for your advice, random man!' line on here from a while ago would be one way to reply.

Is your car a Peugeot? I have an older Peugeot and it needs oil every 3 to 4 weeks. I always seem to get the same guy when I’m paying who suggests I should buy a new car… Yip, if I could afford a new car, I’d buy one, but for the moment I’ll just keep buying oil!

Does he just do it to women? That's the acid test, I think.

@mumda nope, it's an Audi A5 and this particular model/year has issues with oil consumption. It's because the piston rings are too small. Pain in the arse, but I suck it up as I enjoy the car. As long as the oil is topped up when it needs to be and the car is serviced regularly it's fine, just costs a bit more with the oil.

@GreetingCeridwen he seems to do it to everyone .. if someone has a camera or laptop he will go on and on how a different make or model is better. It’s painful to watch but his brain can’t seem to stop him 😂 however don’t get me wrong I’ve met a lot of men who love to explain to women how to do things so this guy could just be one of them 🫠🫠🫠🫠

Hahaha, poor woman wondering why she was being pushed to KitKats during a car emergency 😂

Why didn’t he just tell her to call the AA?!

Could he have been neuro diverse? He sounds very alike my ND friend, it is meant in a caring, harmless way. He won't have picked up on your annoyance.

Thing is if a woman did this everyone would be calling her a busybody.

But when a man does it he’s ND.