Being woken up at 5 am when not going to work

[Eightiesprincess]

I'm very confused right now and wondering if I actually am being unreasonable. My Partner wakes up at 3 am for work (usually 2 alarms later ) goes downstairs then comes back up at 5am to get dressed and go in doing so walks into the bedroom bangs on the light and proceeds to have a conversation with me. This morning I suggested that there was an argument that he could have put the lamp on rather than the main light to which his reply was there is an argument that you could get up and use the day.
When I stated I was off work and on holiday he tore into me telling me I was entitled and ungrateful.
Am I ? I had simply planned to get up at 7 and start the day.

If you got this far. Thank you 🙏🏻

This is the bare minimum... he's very selfish. Yanbu

Some people who are natural early risers can be utter twats about it. Is he like that, OP? Thinks that 5am is like 8am to normal people and you've already had a lie in? Has he never met any normal people but somehow tricked you into living with him? You should set him straight - 5am is the middle of the night and he needs to treat it as sleeping time.

Thoughtless, selfish and inconsiderate anal pucker of a man.

@Eightiesprincess take the bulbs out of the main light!!

@Eightiesprincess my husband would never do that!! this is probably the reason he turns up to the office in suit trousers and non matching suit jacket!!! as well as odd shoes, both black!😄

You can do better than this selfish arsehole. I would dump him.

Ah. I see. So he's thinking you should be grateful to him for having a job that means he has to get up early? But he is resentful to you because he has a job that means he has to get up early. Ok....

If he’s resentful about his hours (we can only guess what his behaviour is really about, though), it’s on him to look for another job which would give him the option of laying in, if that’s what he secretly really wants. I’m guessing it’s not that, though, since he chooses to get up early on his days off and still has this attitude towards you.
He’s the selfish one, here.

He is a total dixkhead. Get rid of him. And until then remove the lightbulb. Selfish dick

This!!!

Why op?

Please ask yourself why you have come to the batshit conclusion that being in a relationship with someone so abhorrently selfish is better than being single. It is literally insane.

So essentially because he's back at work, and you're not, he's pissed off!! He's got to get up early, you don't, so he's annoyed!! Good God, how old is he?!! He's behaving utterly ridiculously. Any decent man, would have been quiet, knowing you don't have to get up. It's not as if you were planning on laying in bed until midday!

DH only gets up 45 mins before me but still lays his clothes out on the landing so he can creep out and get dressed. He lays them out so it looks like a person lying on the floor to scare me to death but that’s another issue 😂. But yes, your partner is very selfish especially getting up so early and expecting you to as well. Sounds like he’s jealous you’re not at work.

He is bieng really selfish. DP usually gets up for work an hour before I do. He puts his clothes in the bathroom the night before, gets dressed and brings me a drink just before he goes out, putting the lamp on.
I am back to work today while he is still on holiday, so I have done exactly the same for him.

So @Eightiesprincess what are you planning to do about it?

My husband starts work at a very early
hour. He gets his kit ready the night before and puts it in the bathroom, so he can shower and get changed without disturbing the rest of the household. In return, the rest of us are quiet and mindful when he goes to bed earlier than us. This is how a team should work.

Obviously you leave him! He's a total fool!

But if he didn’t wake you up how could he do his conquering hero, great provider act to prove why he is a superior human being. It doesn’t work without an audience.

He is trying to assert moral or actual superiority over you by implying you are lazy and he is better than you. He is an arse.

Yes, absolutely, it is a dominating action. Like a fuck you!

Your husband is quite literally mad. This is not normal behaviour. He has a very unusual view of how the world and sleep works.

He's being selfish. I'm back at work straight off the back of having the flu over Christmas but I have made sure my alarm only goes off once, only the little light on, tried to be as quiet as possible etc as my husband is still off work. I would expect the same from him if roles were reversed.

First post nails it.

On the positive side, you have your first New Year’s resolution: dump this selfish prick!

He doesn’t care about you at all. If he did, he wouldn’t act like this.