Privacy on my break at work

[GreenwichMeanieTime]

Where I work we have a large staff canteen as we can’t really go out and get food. It sits a lot of people and is noisy, but it also has a quiet area that is kind of sectioned off to the rest. I often go and sit there in my lunch to read my book, or do my emails or go on my phone and surf the net for things I’m researching e.g. holidays. If there’s space I’ll usually sit there.

Nearly every time I do this, someone from my team will come along and sit next to me, and say something like “ oh, you are being antisocial” and they proceed to talk for the remaining hour about work, what’s going on, Janet in accounts, this customer or that manager and their personal problems. I was in work on Friday and it happened again. I was feeling a bit ill after Boxing Day, went for some quiet time and 2 of my colleagues came along and sat with me and never shut up the whole hour.

Now, to get to this area you literally have to go through the whole canteen and go round a bit cordoned off to get to it. If you go there it’s because you want some privacy.

Now I like my work colleagues but I don’t want to talk about work in my lunch break. I’ve got things to do which if I get them done and off my list, my life outside is a lot easier. Also, my work is quite stressful, and I need a break. I need to eat and do something else for a while. On Friday I literally felt like crying when I heard the clatter of trays on the table. They totally ignore that I am reading a book. I go back to my desk feeling like I’ve had no break.

I’ve tried to fudge my lunch break a bit, going early or late, and it’s made a bit of difference but now a couple of them are saying to let them know when I am going so we can have lunch together. Like I said, the talk is all about the company or work gossip. There is one day when they are not in and it was bliss, but then someone from another dept. came and sat next to me and never shut up once and talks so much that I’m late back because I can’t get an opening to say I’ve got to go.

AIBU for wanting a quiet lunch and if so any ideas for getting a break?

Make your own do not disturb sign draw some pretty flowers on it and point at it if anyone comes near make sure you smile while you’re doing it

Not unreasonable at all. Some people want space to unwind during their breaks. I'd get some big headphones and just pop them on (no sound required) while I ate as a big leave me alone sign, and if someone sits down just smile and nod and carry on listening to your "music" "podcast" or silence or whatever. You have a right to your owns space and quiet time.

Introverts don't owe extroverts entertainment. Don't feel bad about it, just take back your time. You don't have to socialise in your breaks if that's not what you want.

Tell them you need the alone time to relax. Tell them you’ll join them on Friday’s.

I never eat in the canteen. Not interested in anything that is said in there. Eat at my desk and shut my office door. The odd interruption but on the whole respectful. I get on really well with my colleagues but I just want to read my book at lunchtime.

Go sit in your car, or get some really obvious headphones and just wear them, point at them and shrug if people try talking to you

She doesn't have a car.

I feel your pain

I sit in my car for this very reason. It’s bliss