To not understand how this means a man can get a female passport?

[Brla]

A close friend of DH recently came out as trans. He’s had surgery abroad (FFS I think it’s called) and has set up an Instagram account with videos of the process and many, many, many outfits and make up videos. He has two sons and was married for 14 years before this.

I don’t really have an opinion as such on being trans. I think it’s likely that it’s a genuine feeling that I just can’t understand as I haven’t experienced it and don’t think it’s necessarily just a mental illness.

I don’t understand though that this person has not had his genitals removed or changed (not sure how you would express it) and yet has still got a new passport now saying F. Am I being thick for being unable to get my head around this? He still has a penis so surely that means he is male? How can he have had a passport issued as female?! Do you literally just need to apply and say you’re now presenting as female?

@EmpressaurusKitty as a patient would that actually happen though?

Check your local hospital's policy - my local hospitals policy says that if you ask for someone else (I e. an actual woman) you should be treated the same as a racist. Those are the words used, in the policy. And the staff aren't allowed to discuss it with you unless they want to risk a disciplinary against them and being reported to the police for a hate crime. Seriously.

The wants of the man in female nurses uniform outweigh the wants of the women patients.

The bin sounds great. I would not “refuse”
that destination on any grounds. 😂
I love a pun. Can you tell?

@hagchic adams apple is still very much there… not sure what shaving is? Is that another procedure? He still sounds like a man but perhaps when that changes it will be easier to see him as a women. Hard when he’s still speaking with a very deep voice!

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2022/03/17/hospital-told-police-patient-not-raped-alleged-attacker-transgender/

You might want to read this if you believe that.

A hospital told the police that a patient could not have been raped because her alleged attacker was trans, the House of Lords has heard.
The attack took place a year ago and the woman reported it but when officers contacted the hospital, which has not been named, they were told “that there was no male in the hospital, therefore the rape could not have happened”.

Surely a passport is used as a means of identification. So if this person was involved in something horrible when abroad and needed to be identified would it not cause confusion? I confess to finding a lot of this stuff confusing though.

@Heatherbell1978 this is the sort of thing that confused me too

Yes, I'd imagine they are very careful which countries they travel to.

Surely a passport needs your sex on it for security searches at airports?

Look up autogynophilia (AGP). A man's sexual arousal at the thought of himself as a woman. It explains why he wants to say he's a woman, wants other people to say he's a woman, likes wearing all those different "feminine" outfits, and has no intention of losing his penis and balls. He needs those for the masturbation driven by AGP. Losing them and having plastic surgery to create a non functional facsimile of a vagina is the last thing he wants. He's typical in getting just facial feminisation surgery to look more feminine, though it rarely makes them look like actual women.

It isn't "being born in the wrong body" at all. AGP explains why middle aged men suddenly decide they're women and spend fortunes on dresses, wigs and makeup, often after years of marriage and fatherhood, but have absolutely no intention of losing their male genitals.

Again, not your circus.

It's the circus of all women and girls.

The people searching you can change theirs if they like too:

https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/spanish-soldiers-have-exposed-the-flaw-in-the-countrys-gender-self-id-law/

As i said it's a shit show.

Helen Joyce speaks with amazing calm and clarity on this issue. Her book is well worth reading but if that doesn't appeal then here is a link to one of the many interviews she has done.

https://www.mattellison.co.uk/airport-scanners-a-major-fear-for-trans-travelers/#:~:text=For%20trans%20women%2C%20the%20alarm,think%20shouldn't%20be%20there.&text=Some%20trans%20people%20choose%20to,helps%20them%20feel%20more%20comfortable.

His voice will not change. He can pretend by speaking in a falsetto, but it will be fake.
OP, why not read up on AGPs. You may be quite horrified. Also, where’s his wife in all of this?

Also, read about Transwidows.

@Brla You asked about this; Adam's apple shaving, also known as a tracheal shave or chondrolaryngoplasty, is a surgical procedure that reduces the size of the thyroid cartilage to make the Adam's apple less noticeable. It's often performed as part of facial feminization surgery (FFS) to help alter features associated with male faces.

100% this.

Yes because of all these changes , in health care we now ask,,,"was you registered man/ woman at birth?" 🙄

@Soontobe60 she is supporting him. Dh thinks she may have known this for a few years though. She seems quite accepting of it! I don’t think I could be.

It's not always AGP.

Quite often it's internalised homophobia ie he's gay and thinks only women should fancy men therefore he must be a woman.

In younger people it's common amongst those with autism, they feel different and it's an explanation.

Many potential reasons. All rather regressive.

OP, one hospital denied a patient life saving treatment for this.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2023/08/06/teresa-steele-same-sex-care-denied-surgery-nhs-london-hca/

Dr Az Hakeem has worked with people who have gender dysphoria and has identified different groups among them - as mentioned above it can be AGP, it can be internalised homophobia, trauma, autism and other reasons.

He uses a pyschotherapy exploratory approach and people who have worked with him have different outcomes to those dealing with affirmative approaches.

https://www.transgendertrend.com/interview-az-hakeem/

And another used it as an example of transphobia. www.brightonandhovenews.org/2019/12/09/hospital-apologises-to-rape-victim-for-branding-her-request-for-same-sex-breast-screening-medic-as-transphobic/