To just … not have toys?

[giveupontoys]

Obviously we’ll have to have some, but my DS(4) just doesn’t seem to play with them.

Christmas presents included a toy ice cream van and he just gets everything out and then it ends up discarded and thrown everywhere, so bits get lost and it’s unusable. This is the same as everything we get.

He has a few toy trucks / cars type things but doesn’t really seem to play with them.

I know people will say not to let him or to discipline him but he just ignores us … doesn’t solve anything.

I don’t know what to do really. It kind of seems pointless having toys if they end up unusable but on the other hand he has to have some things.

If he doesn’t play with his toys what does he do to occupy himself?

A toy ice cream van? Would never pass my door.
Decent toys not sh*t please.

What does he play with ? What does he do when you’re at home and he’s entertaining himself ? Does he just run around or sit or what ?

Are the toys age appropriate? I found people saw say ‘for age 3+’ and assumed that was the age it was suitable for, when it was the safety age. Often such toys are actually for children a year or two older.

Also curious as to what they do if he they don't play with toys.
Maybe they need some encouragement?

What does he actually enjoy? I’d make that a starting point.

My 4 year old isn’t into anything imaginative. A toy ice cream van would be a waste of time as he just isn’t going to sit and make up scenes with it. He wouldn’t know what to do with it really.

Lego sets, colouring books, stacking cubes for counting/making 3D shapes, air fix quick build cars and more Lego have been hits this year. Things he can do things with basically.

Sounds like he doesn’t like cars/trucks type of toys. Try asking him what toys he would like. You also need to accept that play is going to be messy.

Well it isn't in your house so totally irrelevant.

OP do you have any other concerns about him?

My ds never really did imaginative play so something like the ice cream truck wouldn't work. He did do 're-enactment' though so he would play scenes from Fireman Sam for example. Have you got Lego?

It’s hard to say to be honest, we aren’t usually in the house for long periods for partly this reason!

He climbs, mostly.

What play things (including arts and crafts, books, musical instruments, teddy bears etc) does he have? What does he enjoy doing?

This would be some sort of neglect, surely? To have no stimulating, educational or fun toys in the home?! Children literally learn and grow directly through play. Invite friends over, play with him yourself, play with cooking materials, books, art stuff, digging in the garden. Blocks, stickers, throwing balls. Build something, destroy something, get a pet ant farm, a water and sand table, dressing up clothes. Christ how depressing and limiting it would be to have no toys!

What about construction toys? Like giant Jenga, Lego, stickle bricks and magnatiles...my kids have got the most use out of toys like that rather than toys that are so specific that they can only be played in one way.

He's old enough to do board games now like guess who, connect four and snakes and ladders...does he do them?

Developmentally dc benefit from having toys, so I think you'd be unreasonable.

Are the toys really unusable with a few bits missing or do you just have a very fixed idea of how they should be played with? It's let the DC get on with it, I imagine they will find creative ways to play.

He has a variety of vehicles: planes and cars and helicopters and tractors and fire engines and so on. A wooden train set that’s never played with a paw patrol tower (likewise)

He has a lot of outdoor toys too including a big trampoline.

How are you not in the house much? Understandable on a school or nursery day but weekends and holidays, he must be at home sometimes? What does he do then? Eg chat with you whilst you’re making dinner, or ‘helping’ outside in the garden, pets, watch tv, drawing, puzzles? If you left him in his room for 10 mins what would he do then?

What do you mean by "He climbs, mostly"? Climbs what? Trees?

You must spend at least a few hours at home each day. What does he do then?

The vehicles all sound like the same type of toy. Maybe that's not his thing? What about dolls, or a toy kitchen, or Duplo, or playdo, or paints, or a xylophone, or jigsaws?

Thanks, sorry lots of replies appeared as I was typing.

He is at home sometimes @NewNameNoelle , but he is at preschool four days a week and he does have a lot of activities and I plan things for him as he just isn’t very good at home.

He has bricks and Lego but doesn’t really play with them, just empties them on the floor. But I have seen him play imaginatively in other contexts.

Plenty of books, we are a fairly bookish household.

All I can say is he’s never shown any interest or enthusiasm for those @ManchesterGirl2 . He did have a toy kitchen once but just kept emptying all the contents out then walking away and it was so stressful.

How odd. A toy ice cream van could be anything from a Le Toy Van handmade wooden toy to Lego to cheap plastic tat. Why assume it’s shit?

letoyvan.co.uk/products/dolls-house-ice-cream-van-fsc-100

Has preschool given any feedback as to what he does there?

Fair enough, I was worried he'd not been offered those options. I think it's reasonable not to keep buying stuff he's not into, as long as he has other things to entertain him.

Do you play with him OP?

He does a lot of outdoor activities at preschool but he also enjoys playing with the train set (he has an identical one at home but ignores it.)