Is this enough for Christmas??

[FootballGrump]

Every year, “Father Christmas” brings our children one gift. One gift only… it could be a scooter or a lego set or a Tonybox or similar, they are still young and their taste is not extravagant.
Both sets of grandparents also get one gift per child that goes under the tree, typically something smaller (a dolly, a toy car etc).
In total, each child will have 3 or max 4 gifts to open on Christmas day. One “main” gift plus 2-3 smaller ones from close relatives. Plus a stocking full of bits and bobs.

We think this is ample and our children are delighted with it. Most people these days seem to spoil their children way more so I guess my AIBU is regarding what to do now my eldest is aware enough to start comparing with friends.
Some friends have hinted they think we don’t give our children enough toys.
I disagree, I think they are very fortunate and I already feel they don’t have enough respect for their toys (breaking things, losing the small parts, not putting stuff away). I remember being really attached to my toys and treasuring them, I would like to see more of that in our household.

Just do what makes your kids happy. Don’t worry about others. I adore giving my kids stuff they love so I buy more than you.

You just need to keep it fun and joyful. No sanctimony, no lectures, no virtue-signalling about wooden toys and no repeating of that hideous twee poem about buying four things: something you wear, read, want, need etc.

Yes mean in presents but not all presents have to be toys or Xmas tat. Skin care, clothes, subscriptions, days/out experiences .

i do find myself holding back on purchases in last 3 mths to add to the Xmas pile.

The point of Xmas is excess- your kids get less than a normal birthday. And even less than what I get🙄

You do you….

”the point of Christmas is excess”
🤯
how sad

Sounds crap. Not much to get excited about. Just because my children receive lots of lovely things on Christmas, it doesn't mean they are spoilt.

They are fantastic kids who truly appreciate everything they have and know that not everyone is so fortunate.

I hate this narrative that fortunate children are spoilt children. It doesn't have to be that way at all. It's called parenting.

I think it sounds fine.
When my kids started comparing we told them that Santa sends us a bill so we’ve set him a budget! They understand that some families and other relatives have more money than us.

For me it seems quite a little and not very magical.

But that's personal, everyone does this different I suppose. We do everything from Santa, the magic in there faces when they see there piled and there stockings at end of the bed.

I couldn't imagine only giving 1 gift.

As a child we weren't well off but my mam filled the tree with bits and bobs and not even expensive stuff but it was just so exciting unwrapping, and we had 1/2 main gifts and then lots of bits, crafts arts games etc.

My kids are spoilt with Xmas I can't lie but they have only asked for 3/4 things each and they are small. I just love the magic of Xmas eve nothing, and then Xmas morning bang santas dropped a delivery off!

I think maybe you could add some nice family board games, arts/craft sets for them and some fun things.

But I will add to my comment that I don't have much (any) real consideration of the environmental side of things.

Each year we pick from the giving tree in our local town and buy for the children there, we donate as much as we can to the charity and always drop some food into food back - but that's just a little tradition.

I do think you sound slightly OTT with some of your points. Even with extra gifts and stuff you can still be a good person and teach good values

I have DS14 and DD9. I try and be fair to both and spend roughly the same amount on them however my DS is increasingly into more expensive hobbies as I assume tends to happen as they get bigger. So in an effort to be fair, his presents probably cost around £150-£200, especially when talking about PlayStation 5 accessories and games. So he won’t get as many physical presents to open. My DD however, will get more presents to open on Christmas Day, but it will cost roughly the same amount. They both also get stockings and one item each from “Santa” under the tree which will be the gift they’ve asked for in their letters to Santa

They are only little once. You say you can afford it so get to the shops now! Get clothes etc they might need. It’s magical to see their faces Christmas morning. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t!!!

Quality over quantity, much better than loads of shite that will not be appreciated or looked after. Kids who are given everything end up utterly miserable because they expect it for the rest of their lives, and when they don't get it, feel like its a everyone else's fault for not loving them enough to buy them a shit ton of crap.

This. I’m really surprised by some of the comments on this thread tbh; not to mention where on earth are people getting the money for these mountain of gifts. We’re meant to be in a COL crisis!

One of my favourite Christmas presents was a second hand keyboard. Loved playing that thing. Another best was, quite some years later, my beginners guitar and amp. The starter sets are relatively inexpensive, but I've still got that guitar 25 years later (still got the keyboard too) and the guitar was a big part of me getting to know my husband. We met the new years eve after that Christmas (millennium eve) and found out he lived just round the corner. He played the guitar, i was learning, and we'd hang out and talk music and play. I sometimes wonder, if I didn't get the guitar for Christmas if we'd have hit it off. It was our main shared interest and main excuse to spend time together.
You don't need lots. You just need at least one thing that you really enjoy. And sometimes those things aren't expensive.

Ha! No, it doesn't!

Seems a bit joyless to me and yes as they get older they notice that they get materially less than their friends.
We don't buy toys outside of their birthdays and Christmas but do spoil them at Christmas with lots of little bits that we think they'd like.
I understand your kids don't know any different so probably is normal for them .

Them being wrapped was part of what made it special for me. The paper was completely different to the presents under the tree. It wasn't even like any paper I'd seen in the shops. It had really vintage designs and even the texture was different. As far as I was concerned, that PROVED they were from the North pole. It was North pole paper as far as I was concerned.
Turns out it was the kind you buy by the sheet from the market. But to me, it was absolutely magical. And my mum was always very careful to makesure I wouldn't find even a scrap of it in the house

Anyone else, when you see the enormous piles on social media, wonders where they're going to fit it all in the house?

Better to have a few nice presents that they really want than a mountain of tat that'll end up on a beach in Ghana by next year. Truly magical that is.

Social media has a lot to answer for. We only know what other people do in so much depth because of it otherwise it would be a quick chat in the playground. I never had a stocking. We just didn’t do them. We put out a pillowcase for FC to fill with presents from our relatives. He was a delivery service. My little young brain didn’t see anything strange about this at all. I was perfectly happy.

Whhhaaaaat?

Where's the fun in that?!

I think if that is what they are used to they won't know any different and be really happy and grateful for what they get. Every family is different and it's not all about getting lots of presents..