Pissed off at sister's snobby comment

[Ontherocksthisyear]

This happened a couple weeks ago, but it has really annoyed me the more I think about it. I haven't come out and said its annoyed me, but I wish I had at the time. It's also not the first comment like this she has made.

Anyway, I have just finished a masters. Not that it maybe matters but I did this while being a mum to my DD, being pregnant with my DS (I had terrible nausea all throughout my pregnancy). This master also included placements, so it wasn't just a case of sitting at home writing essays. So I was massively proud of myself and hugely relieved when I finally finished and got my degree.

Anyway, I was out for my birthday lunch with my family and told my sister that I had finished and passed my course, she congratulated me. We were then discussing which uni her son was thinking of going to, I mentioned the one I had just got my degree from (not the best uni in the world granted, but not bad either). Bare in mind my nephew wants to stay fairly local because of health issues, so it's either the one in his city, or the one I mentioned (neighbouring city), or another uni in a neighbouring city.

When i mentioned this my sister screwed up her face and said pretty bluntly 'it's not a very good uni is it', I then said 'well it depends on what you study, it is great for certain sciences and the programme i was on is one of the best in country' she then screwed up her face again as if she thought I was talking a load of shit and reiterated how it wasn't a good uni.

Anyway, I am quite annoyed. I understand she wants the best for her son... but she knows I have literally just got a degree from here. I mean, I literally just told her and she congratulated me. Is this rude of her?

Don't you think at postgrad level people are bringing their actual experiences from the workplace into the picture, and that is often far more valuable than academic study??

She is saying she's slumming it. She thinks that people with 2iis are beneath her and literally says they're a "nuisance".

Do you know the way there's a tit in every class??

Oh my god! You are so up your own arse!

The people with a 2:2 undergraduate degree are aiming high and trying to excel by studying for a Masters degree.

You sound insufferable. Do you say these things in front of your fellow students?

But if you are going to just get a degree going to a prestigious university such as a red brick matters more.

Most people would travel to a good uni to get a good degree. Where you get a masters or phd is often more about where you are working and living at the time so there is less snobbery about it.

Still rude though.

Depends on what the degree is!!

Given her DS has only a choice of 3 universities to go to, which of the other 2 does she feel is better for what he wants to study

I mean even if it is 3rd on her list, unless they live in Oxford or Cambridge what ever he chooses isn’t going to be all that great given the selection restrictions

Congratulations, that's one heck of an achievement!

I'm curious where your sister got her degree and master's from...?

Also, the snobbery around Russell Group Unis can be a bit misplaced.

The rankings are done on research not quality of teaching. So often undergrads are taught by post-grad students who really don't want to be teaching, it's a means to an end.

If you are studying a theoretical academic subject; wanting to work in research etc; aiming for law, or a grad scheme at an accountancy firm it is probably the better bet as there is still a lot of 'kudos' from those unis (rightly or wrongly).

However for applied subjects such as nursing, medicine, psychology, dentistry strong industry links and placements, and the opportunity to be taught byand work alongside experienced practitioners is more important. Lecturers and teaching staff who have made an active decision to come into that role and support the next generation of professionals can have a hugely positive impact.

I did my undergrad English degree at one of the most sought after Russell Group Unis. It was mediocre in my opinion. I then did postgrad teaching qualification, masters and a further professional qualification at a uni that people sneer at. It was far far better in my opinion, at least in my field ( teaching then a related role that straddles education and health).

Tbh I tend to rate the industry view as the most credible as they are the people who will employ our kids. In DS’s case the industry he’s interested in also rate all 4 units he’s applied for over and above Oxbridge, Imperial or in fact Queen Mary’s (which he did consider). I’ve found the international reviews very useful and not too London centric at all but maybe it depends on the course? DS’s is relatively new and quite niche so not offered in lots of places and not mentioned by the Times review for example, which might make the difference? Regardless, I think course trumps institution every time.

Come off it. The snobbery is dripping off that poster. I doubt that there will be any echoing silences when OP is there as I'm sure she is super keen to share her superior wisdom.

No, it...really doesn't. As a senior manager, it makes no difference when hiring. My DH has mainly left working in university as a lecturer now, but sometimes still supervises PhD students and gives recommendations to employers. He says it makes absolutely no difference whatsoever.

It's entirely a made up concept. Very, very few people actually care - the ones who do are usually just ignorant snobs.

Does your sister have any qualifications at anything like the same level as you? If not I suspect a touch of the green eyed monster!

“None taken”

Yes, super rude!

congratulations on your degree, that’s an amazing achievement when pregnant and looking after a child. Don’t let your sister’s snootiness dull the shine of you having done so brilliantly.

I went to a Russell Group Uni. I only found this out 20 years later when I looked it up after reading countless pretentious posts on here about them. I have never met anyone in real life that has ever gave a shit whether my degree is from a RG university or not. Your sister is a knob.

She was very rude, where did she get her Masters by the way?

There can be good eg masters courses at colleges that aren’t so great so would not deliver good undergraduate courses. If she said congratulations and chatted about it I’d say she just meant for someone starting out

You went to uni to gain a masters in a chosen subject and succeeded in getting it, to me it wouldn't matter which uni you went to. Well done.

She doesn't have a master, funnily enough. Not that it matters. Although she is a lawyer and I think she likes to be top dog in the family.

Your sister is very rude .

Wow, huge congratulations on gaining your masters. A masters is a masters whether it's from the OU, Oxford or Birkbeck. You have worked so hard so don't let your sister's screwed up dish detract from your achievement.

This in spades. I guess maybe if you’re looking to intern at a big law or engineering firm where places are super competitive it might make a difference? In fact sometimes there’s an inverted snobbery going on, I have several friends working in creative industries who consider an RG degree a black mark!

Definitely jealous. Keep an eye on her.

Very possible! Perhaps there are certain niches where it matters, I can imagine it in certain areas like...I don't know, finance? And you're definitely right! Some of my actor friends take the right royal piss out of me for going to Oxford. Despite being in totally different industries. 😂 I don't mind it though, it's all a bit silly!

She doesn't have a master, funnily enough. Not that it matters.

I thought this would be the case, she’s jealous, make sure you include all your initials when you sign your Christmas card to her.

She’s jealous of you! Well done you.