Niece ruined my phone case, DSis and BIL refusing to replace it

[losingweightandgainingconfidence]

This is possibly the pettiest thing to ever be posted on here but I need to know if I'm going insane.

I (F25) purchased myself a Rhode phone case - it's a phone case that holds your lip balm in the back of it. Absolutely a frivolous and silly purchase, but I'd had my eye on one for ages and wanted one. They're expensive, but I got it as a treat to myself for losing weight. (I've lost a large amount of weight this year and wanted to treat myself)

My niece (5) has been obsessed won't this phone case. She's into all things makeup and girlie, and loves it. over the weekend my DSis, BIL and DN came over for lunch. I'm sat in the lounge chatting to them all, and my niece is off colouring somewhere. I've obviously left my phone on the side somewhere, probably on charge. She walks in grinning from ear to ear, holding my phone.

She's written her name all over the case, she's drawn smiley faces and the like. It won't come off, I've tried soaking it and everything.

My DSis immediately blamed me, because I "know how much she likes it" and my BIL said I may as well give it to her now as she's made it her own. I've said that if that's the case, I expect a replacement. It's not cheap and while yes it may have been seen as a waste of money, I work and I bought myself a treat.

I'm beyond angry, because it's my personal properly. AIBU to expect them to replace it?

How much was it?

I wouldn’t give it to her no. That’s just rewarding very naughty behaviour. Whether I pushed for a replacement would depend on how much it was

It's £38 😅 stupid money, I know, but I bought it as a treat to myself. They're definitely not struggling for money, they're on very good salaries and very comfortable

They absolutely should replace it, and your niece should be taught not to intentionally ruin other people’s things! What was said to her?

It's about £40 isn't it?
I can see why it's annoying but she is a child and doesn't have a clue. As a parent, I would offer to replace but as an owner of the case, I wouldn't expect it.

Definitely don't give it to her. She should of course be told off to Not sure that you can expect them to replace it though.

They need to put their hands in their pocket as a lesson to keep their eye on their child when not at home

They laughed and said it's cute how obsessed she is, and that they love that she's a girlie girl

Try a magic eraser on it, they're good for shifting marks on hard surfaces.

But obviously they should offer to replace it, and you agree only if you can't clean the thing.

Return her Christmas present and wrap it up for Christmas

What pen did she use on the case?

Might be worth trying some other solvents and/or abrasive cleaners before you give up on it entirely:

Cif/another abrasive cleaner
A magic sponge
White spirit
Could try acetone.

They might not work, and it might damage the case. But it sounds like it is do or die at this point so I would try those before you give up.

If not, seems fair enough to expect a replacement to me.

I'd wrap it up and give her it with a lipbalm for Xmas.

She's 5! Definitely old enough to know better and they should replace it. Sounds like they don't discipline her though if their first reaction was to blame someone else for her bad behaviour and then look to reward her for it wtf.

You are not being unreasonable. 5 is old enough to understand not to mess with other people's things, and if she isn't capable of that then it's on her parents to watch her better. Then only correct response to your child damaging someone else's property I'd to be mortified and apologetic. 'Made it her own'??? Fuck that, do not reward bad behaviour by letting her have it. Her parents lack of adequate response demonstrated exactly why she had such poor behaviour in the first place.
Not unreasonable to want a replacement, depends how hard you want to push for it. But mainly I wouldn't have her in my house again like that. Visit them at theirs if they can't parent better than that.

Of course they should replace it! Absolutely don’t give it to her because she’s ‘made it her own’! Her parents are enabling her spoilt, brattish behaviour.

Definitely don't give it to her, she sounds like a spoilt little madam!

Nail varnish remover is good for removing pen marks.

I would absolutely replace it!

They’ll regret it when she escalates the behaviour at home. One day it’s your mobile case, next month she’s got into her mum’s make up bag.

I'd absolutely replace it!

She's used all sorts, white board pens, felt tips, gel pens which have scratched the surface. It looks like it's done for, I'll try scrubbing it again tonight but I can't see it working 🙃

Have you bought your neice a Christmas present yet? If not I'd wrap it up and give it her as she loves it. That way you'd save some money on buying her a gift and can put it to buying yourself another phone case. Also scrimp on present for SIL/BIL and put the saved money to a new phone case.

And then she'll be robbin banks

Oh she gets into mum's makeup all the time! Lipstick all over her face and dressing table, they laugh and say it's a girl thing

I also don't think it's petty - it's your property. I have two kids and I would replace it without question

Could you just keep it with writing on it

It's the parents response that would piss me off, not a 5yo being a bit of a pain. They clearly placate her day to day and let her run amok. Good luck to them when she's an entitled teen.

I'd gift her some pens and paper "this is what we draw on" for Christmas, and return any gifts for your sister/bil "I had to use the funds to replace the thing your dd damaged"