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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

He left me in city centre…

881 replies

Craics90 · 15/12/2024 02:32

Went in to City Centre today for DH’s birthday. A few of his friends had also arranged to go in today. I asked if he’d prefer to go out with said friends and he repeatedly said no.

Queue 4pm when he began acting like a total arse to me. We went to the usual Christmas market, had some food, waded our way through the crowds to get anywhere and went on a bar crawl.

He’s useless with directions so I usually guide us between bars etc. I asked him multiple times where he wanted to go next and he kept saying that he didn’t mind.

Went to his favourite bar, queued for 40 mins to get inside, got one drink. Whilst standing basically the toilet door, people slamming in to us spilling drink down my back I asked if he wanted to maybe go somewhere more local where we could actually get to the bar and have a dance?

He stormed out of the bar rambling on that I should have stayed at home, even though I spent weeks planning the night and booking in to his favourite restaurant which he made me cancel last night costing me 80£ for late cancellation!

I tried calling him and he told me to F off and said he didn’t care how I got home because I’m not his problem. Therefore, leaving me stranded in the city. Every taxi I stopped was booked and I had to call my elderly dad to come and get me. I felt like such a dick.

Obviously DH had this planned so he could go off and meet friends instead of just saying in the first place. I am so hurt.

He has just came home bashing the door with three others trying to get in and I haven’t opened it. First of all I was asleep and they woke me with the banging, but second of all - bringing people back here when he knows I would be in bed?

AIBU for not opening the door?

OP posts:
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Ewock · 21/12/2024 20:26

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Wow trying to find the right words to express how unreasonable and let's face it, stupid you are.
As a friend of mine puts it: there's no talking to stupid

ICantBelieveItsNotButtercunt · 21/12/2024 20:36

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🤣🤣🤣 I don’t think you’re a woman working in his office, you must be in the kitchen, finishing your wife duties, surely?

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 21/12/2024 20:38

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AndMaEth · 21/12/2024 20:53

Basically he is a coward, he is annoyed at his own cowardice that he didn’t have the balls to just say he wanted to go out with his mates. So he let it boil up to this. It’s manipulative and A horrible trait in anyone, I’d be dumping him and moving on.

Over40Overdating · 21/12/2024 21:05

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Mamalifehasjustbegun · 21/12/2024 21:11

Craics90 · 15/12/2024 10:02

@Missmarymack2 I’ll never get an apology because he never apologies. He turns it all on me. I wasn’t keen on queuing for 40 minutes either, but as it’s what’s he wanted to do that’s what I did.

I’m sorry but the fact that he never apologises and turns everything on you sounds like narcissistic behaviour. If it’s just when he’s drinking, then that could be the problem. Sounds like you don’t have a family? If so then I would get out before it gets complicated.

JoBoJoBo · 21/12/2024 21:31

ZekeZeke · 15/12/2024 07:16

Were you both drunk?
No excuse for his carry on but I'm wondering are we hearing the full story.
You haven't replied which makes me think you fell asleep after your OP.

Yes we only have 1 side of the story.If you were both drunk maybe you behaved badly too.I have friends who when drunk behave badly but blame others and have lack of insight into their behaviour .Why did you not get a bus home ?

RampantIvy · 21/12/2024 22:12

JoBoJoBo · 21/12/2024 21:31

Yes we only have 1 side of the story.If you were both drunk maybe you behaved badly too.I have friends who when drunk behave badly but blame others and have lack of insight into their behaviour .Why did you not get a bus home ?

Read the OP's updates.

rightinthedavinamccalls · 21/12/2024 22:14

I see the thread has been hijacked by the menz. They are sooooo obvious😆

ThePoshUns · 21/12/2024 22:22

rightinthedavinamccalls · 21/12/2024 22:14

I see the thread has been hijacked by the menz. They are sooooo obvious😆

Innit? 🙄

Over40Overdating · 21/12/2024 22:47

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rightinthedavinamccalls · 21/12/2024 23:09

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Absolutely. The funniest bit for me was this - Why did you not get a bus home?

Yes not getting the bus was the problem 😂

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 21/12/2024 23:12

JoBoJoBo · 21/12/2024 21:31

Yes we only have 1 side of the story.If you were both drunk maybe you behaved badly too.I have friends who when drunk behave badly but blame others and have lack of insight into their behaviour .Why did you not get a bus home ?

How many lightweights do you know that get drunk on 2 glasses of wine?

Why are you ignoring all the other shit??

sammyjoanne · 21/12/2024 23:16

Im glad you have done what you have done and hes gone. What he did just plain sucks and totally disrespected you. I really really wish you and family have the best christmas you can do, and your new year is a really truely amazing one of self love, self care, and surrounded by people who love you and support you.

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 21/12/2024 23:24

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JoBoJoBo · 21/12/2024 23:26

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 21/12/2024 23:12

How many lightweights do you know that get drunk on 2 glasses of wine?

Why are you ignoring all the other shit??

We only have her word that she had 2 glasses

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 21/12/2024 23:26

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wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 21/12/2024 23:29

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WisdomOverGold · 21/12/2024 23:54

Here we go again with "he's showing abusive behavior but I keep tolerating him". I'm so sorry OP. I thought the question at the end would be "Where can I get the best divorce lawyer?"

Craics90 · 22/12/2024 00:09

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@EJC69 ah love, thank you for coming on and giving me the wake up call that I needed.

I’ll be sure to book myself in to some couples counselling.

Ps, I said my da was elderly - not frail. Jesus.

OP posts:
Craics90 · 22/12/2024 00:11

@JoBoJoBo ah you’re right Jo. I’d 12 Guinnes in me and a half bottle of Jameson.

Would you like a video update of my next outing?

OP posts:
Imbusytodaysorry · 22/12/2024 00:16

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IdylicDay · 22/12/2024 00:17

WisdomOverGold · 21/12/2024 23:54

Here we go again with "he's showing abusive behavior but I keep tolerating him". I'm so sorry OP. I thought the question at the end would be "Where can I get the best divorce lawyer?"

@WisdomOverGold You haven't even bothered to read the OP's latest posts/updates on this thread before replying, have you.

wigsonthegreenandhatsforthelifting · 22/12/2024 00:18

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Craics90 · 22/12/2024 00:21

Can any of my lovely Dubs on here tell me how we recreate the Harry Potter scene where we just stand on the road and the bus appears? 🤞🏼

Lord save us there’s many a gobshite on here tonight girls.

I hope to Jesus you girls never find yourselves in a situation of being in bed and having strange drunk and drugged up men in your home.

Stay safe and stay grounded my loves.

Absolute legends. 💚💚💚💚💚

OP posts: