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Original poster

I know his secret but how do I play this?

1000 replies

Waffletots · 08/12/2024 14:53

I have been married for five years to who I thought was a wonderful man, we have a child and one on the way.
Last night I received a text from his female coworker telling me that “she’s sorry to be that person…. But has been sleeping with me for nearly a year, he told me he would leave you” apparently she feels bad because another coworker “let slip” that my husband and I are expecting again in a few weeks time.
Now I haven’t even confronted my husband about this, it’s been easy as he left for work early this morning and will arrive home around 6pm. I feel sick at the thought of seeing him, could she be lying? I honestly haven’t seen any signs, he’s mentioned this woman a few times and mentioned she’s the office flirt but I didn’t think anything of it.
What should I do?! I’m scared to speak to my friends and family about this, what if she’s lying?!

OP posts:
No33 · 08/12/2024 17:19

Op Im so so so sorry.

Very glad you're going staying with your brother.

MoleAndBadger · 08/12/2024 17:19

So sorry. I'm glad you've got family to come and stay.

Onceachunkymonkey · 08/12/2024 17:19

Waffletots · 08/12/2024 17:17

Thanks everyone for all of your input, a few minutes after she sent the last message she did indeed send (a lot) of screenshots including messages from an app I don’t recognise, emails, many selfies of them in various places and a few of them they look like they’re lying down in bed looking very pleased with themselves.
I’m heartbroken, I don’t know how he could do this to our family. I’ve been such a fool for toddling along like life was perfect when all this time he’s been sticking his penis is another woman and not thinking about us! I hate him for this, truly. I’ve called my brother and sister in law to stay with me tonight, they will be here before he arrives home, I didn’t tell them much but it was clear I was upset.
I plan to have a bag packed for him and forward him all the messages when I hear him pull up outside. For me, the trust is gone and it’s over for good, I could never go back now after such a betrayal.

Sorry op, good for him to be gone tonight. You can take time to think this through.

OdeToBarney · 08/12/2024 17:19

Ah, shit. I'm so sorry OP.

SmileEachDay · 08/12/2024 17:19

I’m glad you have sister and BIL on the way OP.
He’s a cunt. Forwarding messages is a good idea - means he can’t deny anything.

You don’t need to decide anything logistical beyond the next couple of hours.

toucheee · 08/12/2024 17:19

stripeyshutters · 08/12/2024 15:59

Why are you arsing about on here when you should be getting down to the truth of this?

inspector gadget GIF

Is this how you imagine OP?

Ladylalaboo1 · 08/12/2024 17:20

So sorry op. Cannot believe how truly awful this must be for you, but just surround yourself with support and help from others and know you are strong and you will get through this. ♥️

DollieBantrysPantry · 08/12/2024 17:20

So sorry OP, really pleased your brother and sister in law are coming to be with you and support you

MovingBird123 · 08/12/2024 17:20

Take care to spit on everything as you put it in his bag.

So much easier said than done, but I hope you can just focus on yourself and little ones over the next few weeks. Wishing you a safe, easy labour surrounded by supportive people. xxx

WhatDaHell · 08/12/2024 17:20

Waffletots · 08/12/2024 17:17

Thanks everyone for all of your input, a few minutes after she sent the last message she did indeed send (a lot) of screenshots including messages from an app I don’t recognise, emails, many selfies of them in various places and a few of them they look like they’re lying down in bed looking very pleased with themselves.
I’m heartbroken, I don’t know how he could do this to our family. I’ve been such a fool for toddling along like life was perfect when all this time he’s been sticking his penis is another woman and not thinking about us! I hate him for this, truly. I’ve called my brother and sister in law to stay with me tonight, they will be here before he arrives home, I didn’t tell them much but it was clear I was upset.
I plan to have a bag packed for him and forward him all the messages when I hear him pull up outside. For me, the trust is gone and it’s over for good, I could never go back now after such a betrayal.

He's an absolute monster.

Your plan sounds good, I'm glad you're having family with you. He's a nasty, selfish arsehole and it's unforgivable what he's done.

Stay strong 💐

MamaBobo · 08/12/2024 17:20

What an utter bastard he’s been. You have been incredibly strong, you’ve been very calm and considered all afternoon while this unfolded. At least now you know. Let your family support you and help you over the next few days. Sending hugs.

Readnotscroll · 08/12/2024 17:20

So sorry OP, you and your children deserve so much more xxx

JackieQueen · 08/12/2024 17:20

Oh sweetheart I'm so sorry, stay strong for yourself and your little ones and get as much support as you can 💐💜

Imhelendawson · 08/12/2024 17:20

MounjaroUser · 08/12/2024 14:56

I think he was putting ideas in your head about her being the office flirt, so that when he was found out he could blame her.

Yes and in my experience of cheating men, they always seem to mention in conversation the woman in question.

PondWarrior · 08/12/2024 17:21

I’m so sorry. I think you’ve done everything right today. You deserve much much better. Sending strength for getting through his inevitable BS this evening.

Darraghbegone · 08/12/2024 17:21

I’m so sorry to hear this. I’d speak in detail to your brother and parents before he comes home. x

Mrsbloggz · 08/12/2024 17:21

I'm so sorry OP, please make sure you have support.

2025willbemytime · 08/12/2024 17:21

I am so sorry @Waffletots . You are doing amazingly. Let your brother and SIL look after you and remember we have your back too.

My H had an affair and I still can't believe it.

TequilaNights · 08/12/2024 17:21

I'm so sorry OP.

My next message would be, are you with him now?

adriftinadenofvipers · 08/12/2024 17:21

Glad that you are going to have loved family members there for support. You've got this x

Comingupriver · 08/12/2024 17:21

It’s good you’ve to family. Take their support and don’t let him fool you or guilt you into forgiveness.

MrsSchrute · 08/12/2024 17:21

I'm so sorry OP, there is no excuse for his actions and you owe him nothing.
Hold your head high, there is nothing for you to feel ashamed or embarrassed about, he is the one who should feel ashamed.
You believed your husband and trusted him, that is exactly what you should do in a marriage.
Don't take his shame upon you.
This to SHALL pass, brighter days are coming.

2025willbemytime · 08/12/2024 17:22

You are no fool. That's him.

Motherbear44 · 08/12/2024 17:22

You have not been ‘a fool’. He has been an absolute ae and fooled you. He has done it. I ‘m glad that family are supportive. Maybe SIL could be your birth partner.

Keep telling yourself that you are not at fault.

Tetchypants · 08/12/2024 17:22

Please let your brother punch him in the face before you boot him out. What an absolute bastard.

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