Why do my in laws ALWAYS desecrate my toilet?!

[sydneyprescott]

In laws coming round this morning. So I’ve cleaned the downstairs bathroom.

Literally EVERY time they come, one or both of them take a massive stinky dump in our newly cleaned toilet. Can they not bloody go at home? For context they only live 10 mins away so it’s not like they have a big drive and then need to drop off a load

Where else are they supposed to go to the toilet? And why bother cleaning it before they come, why not after they've left?
Can't say I'd care that much if MIL had a poo in our toilet (perhaps she does) but I would be slightly irrated if the toilet wasn't clean but probably not enough to complain about it on MN.

Toilets are for shitting in and unfortunately shit stinks. If you feel they are doing it on purpose, just don’t scrub your loo until after they’ve visited? How come your loo is freshly cleaned before EVERY visit? Maybe they prefer your bathroom? 🤣 or resent you so make sure they do it in your house? Who knows. I’m assuming you know that neither of them have digestive issues?

I’d ask my parents but then again we have that sort of relationship where I can ask in a jokey tone, ‘’ Why are you always shitting in my loo every time you visit? Go at home!’’ 🤣 (This lets them know you’ve noticed and keeps it a bit more light hearted). Tell them that if they must go and they need to clean the loo of any marks afterwards, there is loo cleaner in there, and open the windows/shut the door when finished as the mess and smells aren’t nice.

Why can’t people communicate? Especially with their immediate family who they should be comfortable enough with.

@Teanbiscuits33 "‘’ Why are you always shitting in my loo every time you visit? Go at home!’’ 🤣 (This lets them know you’ve noticed and keeps it a bit more light hearted)."

Nobody would really say that to another person, would they? Letting them know you've noticed them using your loo as a....er, loo?

Oh yeah ofcourse. I was just thinking about using the brush obviously 😅..

If I thought someone I had a close relationship with was purposely timing their toilet trips to when they were visiting me and it was happening without fail every time, no matter how long the visits were, then yes, I’d ask in a light hearted way. Like I said, toilets are there to be used for their intended purpose, but since OP thinks they do this on purpose and unnecessarily then if I was her, and dependent on the relationship, I’d ask them. If it was my parents, for instance, my mum would joke back and say, ‘’ Well, that’s what I think of you!’’ 🤣. But other than that, all OP can really do is leave cleaner in there, let them know where it is and ask them to shut the door when they come out!

If they frequently visit for an hour or two each time then it’s understandable, but if they are using the loo every visit even if they’re only there for 5 -10 mins, then I would think it’s a habitual thing.

When you've got to go, you've got to go?

Some people naturally go several times a day. Maybe they're those people?

I've heard people say this before - that they choose when they poo. I've never understood this. I have to go when I have to go. I can't hold it in.

I can hold it. Most people can I think, unless they’ve got bowel conditions or something which I suppose OP wouldn’t necessarily know whether or not this was the case. For me though, thinking someone poos in my loo purposely to make my house smell for whatever reason would be the last thing I considered, but I have to admit if it was happening without fail at every single visit, regardless of the length of the visit (assuming no ibs etc), then I might wonder after a while if they timed it, especially because both parents do it so it’s less likely that one of them just has a bowel issue.

I’ve known people to not want to stink their own house out before now, or to use it as a passive aggressive signal. An ex friend once took a massive dump at the house of someone she secretly disliked just so she’d stink the bathroom out!

We don’t know how long the visits last though or any background information so can’t judge really.

She also used the word desecrate.

At home, 10 mins away, before they leave.

Er, it's a loo. It's only purpose is to be used for people's bodily functions. Why would anyone police this, FFS? Find something more interesting to think about, OP.

Given the hyperbolic language OP used, I'm pretty sure she would have gone into great detail if they actually did leave a mess.
OP hasn't been back once to confirm or deny whether they leave a mess.

Get some harpic loo cleaner tell them to use it after shiteing...it will kill the smell

I would feel very uncomfortable stinking out someone’s downstairs loo - never mind on a regular basis. But people have different opinions on it. I try to only poo at home or in my private hotel room en-suite loo etc if on holiday.

But I would guess the shitting is part of a larger pattern of behaviours with her PIL that annoys the OP.

Reply as previously.

I am a little puzzled by much on this thread. Not least how people manage to stink out a house by having a poo. I have smelled poo if I follow someone straight into the loo- but I don't think I've ever smelled it elsewhere in a house unless it's not been flushed and the door's been left open. And thankfully, I don't know anyone over the age of about 5 who would do that.Mind you-many Mumsnetters appear to be married to men with absolutely appalling habits!

Oh look, op started a thread about excrement then didn’t return.

I am shocked

I'm not and people fall for it every single time.

You're probably feeding them too much 💩

Clog it ahead of their visit with lots of TP?

Yes to this.

You're not unreasonable, OP.

Surely they would feel something a-brewing and not leave home until they had dealt with it? It would be different if they were in the car for a few hours.