Does everyone feel like this a lot as they get older?

[Hunkkp]

Or is it not that common and I need help?!

I don’t know how to explain it well, but I am basically quite often a mildly angry, frustrated and irritated woman. I can be perfectly pleasant and believe that’s how I come across most of the time as describe me as positive and upbeat and kind…. But inside I’m rarely these things!!!

Honestly, so many things make me angry inside. Bad service, traffic, the weather! I’m a miserable git. I didn’t used to be so pessimistic. Is this just life?

Same! Got Graves after cancer treatment - could have been the radioactive tracer dye, could have been the stress... 18 months carbimazole for me.

I was surprised when the Endo's said it really could be triggered by stress - apparently there was a big outbreak after WWII...

This sounds like perimenopause, it definitely was like that for me! Strangely, I still haven’t gone through the menopause and I feel less like it now, but I also stopped having hot flashes so I’m it is linked.

When i was a younger woman, we all used to say, there is no one worse to be around than middle aged women.

As the middle aged women were often angry, nasty and horrible to the younger women.

Because the middle aged women were losing their youth.

I remember older women being horrifically cruel to me, when I was in my twenties.

Now I'm 40 myself, I really try not to be nasty or cruel to women who are younger and prettier than me. So the cycle doesn't keep going

Yes but I’m not even mid 30s
I said to a friend that I’m usually very happy in myself and then someone will come along and spoil my mood. Eg I could be having a nice time shopping and then someone will barge past me and knock me out of the way or be incredibly rude.
So to sum up I blame other people for it 😂

Yes I am very easily irritated despite being on HRT. Got irritated with an elderly woman yesterday who was driving for ages at 10mph and then felt bad afterwards for getting annoyed. Constantly irritated at work clients who are so entitled and do nothing to help themselves. Irritated at my dog ( even though I adore him ) as he follows me everywhere and won't give me a minutes peace. Got really irritated with a much younger friend earlier in the week who I felt was bragging about a new house she wanted to buy and was a bit rude to her but found her so irritating and actually don't even care now if the friendship has ended because she constantly irritated me with her perfect life being thrust at me , Sorry I know how horrible I sounds. I think we just reach an age where we just don't want to be bothered by all this stuff. I just want a quiet life away from other people !

I think part of the anger and frustration is because women coming into their forties know that they are losing their looks and youth.

So they feel bad about themselves, and they get angry at everything.

I went thru a grumpy phase but I think that was due to the strain of raising children.

Now that kids are mostly grown & I'm truly older (age 55+) I am almost relentlessly positive, optimistic, resilient, content & cheerful all the time.

I am outwardly like this, for example my work clients feedback that I am lovely, helpful, reassuring etc but inside I'm just irritated ! At least I suppose I am hiding it most of the time when I really need to !

I have very little patience around men (unless they are my gay friends) but I am lovely and happy around women. I see so much unacceptable behaviour from men around me that I just can't stand most of them anymore.

I recently turned 41 and this is me 100%

I had quite a few health issue over the last 18 months, which put life in perspective a bit, and I think that hasn't helped. My hormones are fine but I'm being treated as if in peri and take HRT patches.

I wouldn't say I'm angry as such. It's more I have no tolerance for stupidity or triviality anymore. I find myself feeling irritated by things that I think are childish or pointless. I've become absolutely happy to speak up for myself, which I never did or could have done in my 30s. I'd say it's a self-assuredness that has led me to just let my emotions flow. Sure I can mask some of it, but I'm far less likely to now than I did 10 years ago.

I have a friend who has just sold her very successful company to travel the world, she's 43 but looks about 25, has a partner who adores her, kids are grown up left home with good jobs, and she's still a very angry and frustrated person 😂

And this is the kind of crap that mature women are sick of.

Fuckssake.

Total opposite. I've come into my 40s having lost all my excess weight last year, and I look and feel better than ever. I no longer have the need to settle for disrespect like I felt I did before. I'm more confident about how I feel and look than I've ever been, and know my worth. That's why my tolerance for rubbish has waned.

Jeez, no! Women aren't angry because they are past it. It's much more likely because we get wiser and have more experience and we view others less naively.

Not at all but my 55 year old male partner is a major grump and that's not menopause! Its very hard to live with tbh

"Crap" "fuck sake".

That's very angry language.

You're definitely fitting the stereotype of what we were saying. That mature women are angry.

But not because we are apparently no longer pretty according to men!

Some middle aged women are definitely angry that their looks are fading.

And that they are not as pretty as younger woman.

They've told me in real life.

It wasn't because you were young and pretty. It wasn't resentment. It was because they couldn't tolerate your zest for what they considered mundanity. By 40+ you've got a life behind you, and the thought crosses your mind that people in their 20s don't have a clue and should just quit whining about their favourite lipstick no longer being stocked. Certainly I never resent younger, prettier women. Perhaps it's because I'm more attractive now than I was in my 20s, and get far more male attention now, owing to a massive weight loss and changes I've made.

You have a very weird and shallow friendship group in that case.

Yep. I call people out for pushing in the bus queue most days now. Also a red mist decends on anyone holding up the bus needlessly because of them not having the right fare or their pass out ready. I get so worked up. I'm 40.

HRT really made a massive difference for me

It definitely was because I was young and pretty.

When I was young, older women at work made my life a misery. They were vicious to me. They would isolate me

One woman who talked to them, but wasnt wasn't involved in the bullying of me, pulled me aside and said to me:

"I'm really sorry for what you're going through. They're jealous of your looks. They have said that to me."

52 - husband with cancer, in laws with dementia. I'm raging constantly. I'm trying not to but life has become harder.

And you're fitting another stereotype perfectly. The "you're all just jealous" one.

Enjoy whatever it is you're imagining women in their 40s and 50s are jealous of. I truly hope it lasts longer than your dismissal of those of us who have "lost our looks".