Neighbour won’t change Wi-Fi password

[bluestoneboys]

Backstory - I get on pretty well with my neighbour, kids same age etc and my son used to go to school with them and loves to go over and hang out on occasion, while he was over there, neighbour let him use the Wi-Fi and he memorised the password (they know his history etc and that he has a brain like a sponge and a photographic memory)
now I can’t keep him off the Wi-Fi (at home he’s only ever had access to my personal hotspot so that I can completely limit access)
eventually I plan on getting him an iPad (probably for Christmas) so that I can download apps that can keep him safe as he’s permanently screaming at me when I say no YouTube etc as I don’t think it is appropriate for an 8yo
Now I’ve sussed out that he’s been hooked up to her Wi-Fi for about 2 weeks and has been sneaking time on his laptop overnight which fills me with anxiety about what he’s possibly doing on there. But she’s said she can’t change the password as that is too complicated etc
obv I know he’s my responsibility but given everything else he’s got going on and neighbour is aware I found it quite odd that she couldn’t change it in an effort to 1) stop him freeloading off her and 2) keep him safe
as of today I’ve now removed his laptop from him completely as it’s the only option I have currently to stop him, but he’s been flat out screaming and shouting for an hour now because his laptop is ‘very special’ to him as it’s where he stores all his work for homeschooling and also pictures of his pets (especially ones who have died) and he can get quite sentimental and sees this as a bit of an attack from me now
AIBU to ask her to change it to something he doesn’t know or was I out of line?

Changing the password is a massive PITA. We have so many devices connected to it that would have to be reconnected.

I am amazed that you are blaming your neighbours for the fact that your child is screaming at you.

What? No you can't expect that. I had to change our WiFi password and it was a total pain in the arse as everything on the network also had to be set up again. No way would I do that because my neighbour can't enforce boundaries with their own children.

Completely agree with others that YABU. There is no way that I would be changing my network configuration to fix someone else's parenting issue. In my house I would have 30-odd devices to reconfigure! However it is possible to block wifi connections on the laptop depending on the operating system it uses. I've posted a link to such an article here...
https://www.wikihow.com/Block-a-WiFi-Network-on-PC-or-Mac#:~:text=Type%20netsh%20wlan%20add%20filter,network%20you%20want%20to%20block.
Depending on the hardware your neighbour uses, it's possible they could block just your son's laptop without changing the password but that won't work if he then gets access to a different device and they also might not know how to do this.

He’s screaming at you because he has a dopamine addiction. He doesn’t need a laptop.

Did you have a laptop at eight? I didn’t. Nor a phone or tablet, or access to YouTube. He does not need it.

Surely you can set screen time limits on the devices? A certain amount of time on the thing as a whole, then individual time limits for apps etc

If I were your neighbour I would understand, perhaps you know someone who can help change the devices for her?

Depends on the router. Google Home you can do from an app, same with EE and AFAIK the BT group services as a whole. I'd just ask and see in case it was easy.

I'd absolutely block the WiFi otherwise. It's not good practice to use other people's WiFi like that especially with underage kids, you don't know what controls are on it, what other devices are on it etc etc

Set up proper parental controls in your router that are not dependant on what wifi is being used.

This is your parenting issue not the neighbours stop blaming them and parent your child

@bluestoneboys "given everything else he’s got going on"

What did you mean when you wrote this? You also mention "his history".

Suggest just state the true context instead of expecting people to guess..
you might get the same answers but you've got no chance of getting any sensible, helpful answers if you don't

the screaming is a bigger deal.given his emotional pet cemetry angle and hijack wifi on sly.....he surely has a comprehension of right\wrong. when it falls in his corner.
i know its hard but hes not really hard done by or excessive punished when knowingly breaking rules. tust broken=consequences.
thts just tough.
maybe calmly explain hes your precious thing and there is nothing you wont do to keep him sfe.however if wants trusted with device nd use of he has to keep his end of the deal.then there is nothing to fight about.

I wouldn't know how to change mine but even if I did i wouldn't

If I change my password I need to log in again to

My phone
Tablet x 2
Kindle
4 smart plugs
3 Alexas
2 Firesticks
Smart meter

Plus any of my family or friends who automatically connect when they come in would need to update too

So no there's not a chance in hell I'd change my password just because your child won't do what he's told

Yes you’re being unreasonable.

tape your sons laptop or any device off him when you don’t want him to use it.

simple.

If they changed it I suspect next time he was playing there he'd come back with the new password.

Your neighbours password isn't the real issue here.

You are being ridiculous. I thought your ds was about 14 but then I saw he is only 8? Do your job as a parent and limit his access to his laptop, however 'special' he says it is.

Take the charger and let him keep his laptop......agree to a full charge of either once or twice a week. That way it's up to him to limit his usage.....once that batteries gone its gone until the next agreed charging day.

I’m surprised how many people think YABU. If this happened to me, I’d change the password no problem because I wouldn't like a young child to have access to god know what dodgy websites via my WiFi and I’m a responsible person.

Just block the channel on all devices

iCloud it’s not router dependent, or even internet connection dependent.

i can set timers for any app/internet connection on any or all of dd’s devices- laptop, phone, anything else she may use with her iCloud account.

all you do is set up a child account linked to your iCloud. It also automatically restricts everything age related, so an 11 year old couldn’t access Snapchat and other apps where you need to be 12.

it makes no difference whether she’s on WiFi, 4g, or not connected at all, it will still shut down when it’s supposed to.

This. And you know it. Your son’s behaviour is unacceptable and that needs dealing with. At 15 this will be a significant issue.

Go on his device, find the wifi he is connected to, and click on forget this network.

Ah a reverse!! Of course it is! Surely noone would be this self important! @bluestoneboys as above ignore your batshit neighbours entitled demands, it's on her to parent her child.
Hopefully the child doesn't actually have such unfettered access to the Internet.

He's 8. That laptop is yours, not his. He is allowed access to it at certain times, for certain reasons. Otherwise it stays where you store it (and he cannot get to it).

Do not buy him an iPad.

Show your neighbour this link