Is it reasonable to ask a woman to change her profile picture?

[NewmanintownRob]

I have someone I am seeing and she has a picture of her and her deceased husband as her main profile picture on Facebook. I keep in touch with a lot of family and friends through Facebook, but I’m not obsessed by it. However, she has been a widow for four years and I am fully supportive of her sons and family and her deceased husband’s family. However, trying to friend her on Facebook and get her starting to learn more about my family is challenging. if she just simply had a picture of herself, it would be easier - her family and friends know about me and her, most of my family and friends know about me and her. I have a picture of her in my apartment and on my phone - she has no pictures of me in-home or on her phone. I’m trying to advance this to the next level and I’m starting to get worried that she isn’t wanting that. I am giving a time but it does make me a little uncomfortable. AIBU ?

She can't hear man

😂😂😂

Sorry wrong thread

Well at least we know where the terminal insecurity is coming from. I wonder if there's a suspicion that Mr Unalive is actually Mr Alive ? This is beginning to sound like a great plot for a Netflix series.... maybe Harlan Coben could write it?

Christ on a bike. No. Christ on a satanic penny farthing.

You weren't the mistress. You were the studmuffin. Used for sex. Which feels very odd as your sex god credentials dont present in your writing!

Mistress. Making love. Date. Never felt like this before. Stop romanticising everything!

@MildredSauce

Christ on a bike. No.

Christ on a satanic penny farthing.

😆 Haven't heard that before!

What?

The term "mistress" can only be applied to women. You are a man, so you cannot be a mistress.

Some people on here don't seem to understand the definitions of words.

Some people on here don't seem to understand the definitions of words

They also seem to make words up (such as "unalived")

Inspired by @mistressofthedarkside - read back in the thread for context!

The word you're looking for is 'cicisbeo'; the lover or 'gallant' of a married woman. Another term is 'The Other Man', witting or no.

The other word you're looking for is 'dead'.

"I would never want anyone to erase their past or to erase any memory of the unalive husband - yet there is a point where it takes it too far"

That decision ('too far') is not yours to make, it's hers. If you choose not to accept what feels right to her that is your decision.

In thinking about it, your attitude that you think you know what someone should feel and should do is another one of the reasons that I would never date if I was to lose my DH. No one has the right to impose their beliefs on me, especially as to how I choose to remember and celebrate my marriage to a wonderful man.

If you can't live with the way she is NOW, then it's time to call it quits.

Studmuffin has found a new trigger word to get him some mommy attention I think. He jumped the shark with widow. As is best with only partly formed puberty brains we notice without returning much interest and go back to talking amongst ourselves.

This spinet, I’m no musician, what does it sound like? It looks quite compact. How quickly could you ride round it on a satanic penny farthing?

Ffs! he mentions she’s a widow because it’s a big part of the dilemma / situation he finds himself in. He’s not a guy who’s jealous of new partners ex, but rather was asking the community for support navigating a new relationship with a woman who is a widow, ie. Her previous partner is not someone she might “get over”, but someone who will be ever present - he needs help dealing with that.

To all those who keep going on about how many times OP mentions “widow” are either thick, or being thick on purpose. It’s soooo damn obvious why he notes it, and it’s juvenile to pretend that you don’t know.

Seems to me some posters here just want to beat up on a man, any man, and this guy will do. Just stop now please, you sound f-ing pathetic.

And I voted he was being unreasonable with the question asked in the original post. So I’m not his biggest fan, but some people here are just being pathetic, or trolling for fun - maybe they should find a healthier hobby…?

You can also say ‘fucking’ here.

I know. But didn’t feel like it.

Is that alright with you?? Want to try troll me??

😆 bitter old bat. Genuinely love that. Has made my night. Hey @MistressoftheDarkSide i think I’ve taken my first tiny step towards gothdom!

🤣

@TheMamaLife why do you keep quoting yourself?

I thought I was just overtired. I wondered that too!

But not "dead", apparently.

????????

As has been said, a man isn't a mistress, and you said you're a man?

Also, unalive is a ridiculous word.. Just say dead!

.

I have been someone’s mistress once before and it is a weird feeling that I don’t want to experience again

I'm not surprised, given that you're a man.

😂