BiL explicit texts - WWYD

[Calmondeck]

I’m having a ‘did that just happen’ moment… have not disclosed this to my DP yet

Received a text from BiL asking for a chat. This is extremely unprecedented, we send the rare occasional birthday text or family photo.

I called worried something was wrong (DP is overseas on a work trip). BiL didn’t accept the call and asked if we could text instead.

He rapidly disclosed a hidden obsession with male on male oral sex and suddenly started sending me explicit images of random men, complete with commentary about what he’d do with them. His texting went on for 1.5 hrs.

I woke up today vaguely wondering whether it was a scam, but feeling certain it wasn’t.

This morning I got a perfunctory “I appreciate the safe space last night. Kindly clear the chat. No need to raise this with DP or (his wife’s name)”.

My mind is spinning. Any advice?

Is it usual for gay or bisexual people to send explicit pornographic images to other people (note, all three were women) whilst struggling with their sexuality? Absolutely not, and no well meaning adult would send such images to another adult without first gaining consent to do so.

What world do you live in where that's acceptable behaviour?

He needed a safe space so badly, that he had to simultaneously text three separate females with gay porn?

What’s sad is a man sending explicit hard core gay porn to his wife’s friends and family and then latterly claiming that communication as a one way safe space.

Then asking they keep that communication secret creating distance between them and his wife and them and their partners and expressing anger that people chose not to follow his wishes. That is manipulation.

He may or may not be gay or bisexual he is definitely a manipulative arsehole

And on that note, women are not human shields for men's fetishes.

Stop the drama? He sent her pornographic images!!! ⛳⛳⛳ Save your sympathy for someone who deserves it.

Are you bored or something ? Posting purposely inflammatory messages

Whilst unsettling, is it possible he was telling you these things as he is a bit confused and feels he needs to off load? Perhaps he is comfortable sharing these thoughts, confidentially, with you.

I think you probably haven’t read the other posts from the OP, this isn’t a confused guy, this is a man who gets off by sharing his sexual fantasies with most likely non-consenting women.

I call it Daily Mail Style. She’s just missed out the price of the OP’s house.

Wanted to check in to see how you all are @Calmondeck ?