Dh has walked off and left me alone at 1am in the street. 2 miles from home

[Boopadoop90]

Just that really. We were out with friends, going back to theirs. Dh refused to back to theirs but I don't know why. The others left in a cab. I couldn't leave dh alone in the pub. I I said I'm going home. He said OK. Followed me out in a fit and angry, cos he felt obliged to follow me. He's walked home. I'm 2 miles away from homre and sitting in the cold shivering
He messaged me to ask if I got an uber home. I said no, he said good we've spent £x on uber tonight.

He's walked home and I'm sitting on the kerb, 2 miles away in the dark, cold.

Play stupid games
Win stupid prizes

You left the same venue at the same time and you said you’d walk home. He walked home but instead of walking with him or following, you decided to sit on the kerb for two hours as some sort of test. I think that’s pretty silly of you. You’re an adult. You could’ve walked close behind him or got a cab so you put yourself in this situation and now seem to be taking the line that he abandoned you and didn’t care about you.

Why are the majority of posters being so unkind to the OP? Do you always act in a logical and sensible manner when drunk or upset?

@Boopadoop90 you need to change your name to kerboflage 🙂

Hope talk with your other half goes well today.

Tbh, this is exactly the sort of thing I'd have done when I was 16-19 years old.

But the OP is 51. She has children.

Yes, I agree that she didn’t behave in the most appropriate manner but there are probably good reasons for that.
It took me longer than you @GreyCarpet to grow out of that type of behaviour (mid thirties for me) and maybe the OP just needs some support to do that too.

And some people just court drama their entire lives.

She coupd have left with her friends and left him to it.

She could have left and got an uber.

She could have left and walked home with him.

Instead, she dramatically announced on the Internet that she was cold and sleeping on kerb all night because she'd lost her real world audience.

If she's still being contrary and petulant in her 50s, it might just be a character trait 🤷🏻‍♀️

And, whilst it can helpful to support someone when they've behaved like a dick. Sometimes the thing that is most likely to make them wake up and do something about it is people holding up a mirror to their behaviour and pointing out that they were a dick.

Coddling people, "poor you"ing them and finding someone else to hold responsible for their behaviour just enables it.

She's not a child she's a fully grown woman.

Quite.

I'm 50. If I had any friends who behaved like that then, well, I wouldn't because they wouldn't be my friend.

I'm too old and dealt with enough of my own shit to be pleading with and cajoling another adult.

@downwindofyou "She's not a child she's a fully grown woman."

So at what age is it OK to leave a drunk person in a vulnerable position?

That’s blatantly not true. People can make positive changes at any age if they have the right support.

@Allelbowsandtoes I was quite pleased with that comment until I started worrying thatI had I mixed up buffoons and baboons. That would have been ruder!!!

I think this is very valid.

I'd expect the messages to be far less coherent if drunkenness and upset were to blame.

All she needed to do was book an uber when she walked out and said she was going home.

Oh , and OP I wouldn't have abandoned you. Just not my style. Often amongst the last left at somewhere but always go home with a friend or DH . Wouldn't leave someone alone. Glad you are home safe and sound though. Play loud music in the morning , That wlil wake your DH up.

Given its 4pm, I suspect that ship has sailed. And I'm not sure that advising someone who's engaging in dramatic dysfunctional behaviour to engage in more of it is a positive thing.

@stillis "but who knows how many times he’s dealt with all this over the many years together"

Indeed. I'm not saying that her dh/friends have no right to be furious, outraged, or to decide that they never want to have nothing more to do with the OP ever. AFTER they have made sure she is safely home.

There are some very random and petty people on this thread.

FFS! grow up!!

I'd have the hump with you if you get this bloody attention seeking after a few sherries!

Give your head a wobble!

How? Physically manhandle her into a taxi?
Do you think a taxi would take them both if she's stropping, resisting and telling him no?
Or do you think the police would end up being called?
Do you think they should have to stay outside in the dark and cold, watching to check she's safe from a distance of course!