Has afternoon tea food for a child changed significantly?

[DeepBalonz]

I’ve just moved back to the UK. DS (4) has a play date with the neighbour’s son. As a 90s kid I was given fish fingers and beans, dinosaurs and peas etc as tea at friends’ houses.

Is that kind of food still the done thing or has it all gone a bit posh along with most other things?

Too early for dinner but still a decent time since lunch so fruit and peanut butter probably won’t be enough.

It's high tea not afternoon tea (different things as I understand it), but a small hot meal late in the afternoon is pretty standard at the nurseries around us. I like it as it allows more variety and veg than cold snacks.

I don't think its too much at all?

Check for allergies - peanut butter would be a no for my allergic child

I have never heard of a cooked meal for a snack on a play date?

We usually offer fruit, toast, cheese cubes, dried pretzels or similar. I would usually just cut up a few things on a small platter for them to share depending on what they like and how long they are here.
Play dates more like 2 hrs max for my 4 year old though and parent still comes too

So it seems that a couple of fish fingers and a spoon of beans is 'tiny' when served for a school lunch

who has said this?

By healthy eater I mean healthy appetite

I’m doing the mum a favour re pick up hence long-ish play date.

When it's just us, we have more food cooked from scratch. But when the boy's friends come round, it's nuggies and pizza, 100%. Always play it safe when other kids are concerned! 😅

OP 6 hours is a really long playdate for 4 year olds. Is it a playdate or are you babysitting? If the latter, feed them what you want within reason.
Cross posted with your update - you're doing her a favour, the kids eat whatever you fancy IMO.

Us, too! I'd be grateful for anything served mine, but if the friend's parent served a meal, something hot/cooked especially so. I forgot about the couple slices of left-over home made pizza I added to our snack plate (sliced into pieces of a couple bites each). 😋

For a 6pm pick-up, I would do pizza, sandwiches or fish fingers together with some cut up veggies. Maybe a few fries if fish fingers. Most small children will eat before then or at least around that time, and so would be hungry by then.

Surely that’s a lot for just afternoon snack?!? I assumed you meant dinner too. I’d give some fruit, biscuits cheese, houmous carrots.. that sort of thing is snack. I’d never consider a fish finger a snack!?

It's all breadsticks, hummus and cucumber or possibly pom bears at 3:30. Fwiw my child has never managed hummus and would bite your hand off if you offered fish fingers and beans whatever time of day.
Why don't you do hot chocolate and some berries on the side if you want something warm.

A cup of hot milk and a biscuit when they come in for a heat. Then some picky plate snacks a couple of hours later - cracker and cheese with some berries/cucumber sticks.

As others have said just do your thing. 12-6pm is a long playdate, you need something to break ot up. I am guessing your friend is working, I am sure she would be grateful for anything you feed her DC. My suggestionis pancakes, more substantial than just fruit and crackers, warm but possibly won't spoil their appetite ( also contain eggs so not totally empty calories).

😂 So true! 🤗

No I wouldn't give them that as it is too much and mine would not eat a dinner afterwards.

Ask his mum. But honestly mine would have fruit, cheese, crackers or a yogurt.

They will have had a lunch, they will have dinner why are you fitting in another meal.

Please check with his mum but if mine had more than half a toastie then that would be it.

It is concerning how normalised over feeding is on this thread. They have tiny stomachs at that age and you should be able to see their ribs.

Something fun like waffles or Crumpets with cheese or marmite. Or tea cakes are nice. Glass of milk or hot chocolate as it's autumn. If a friend is round you can have treats surely. Fishfingers would be more like supper (you did ask!).

Some of these snacks people are describing are far more substantial than a couple of fishfingers.
Lack of understanding of calories might have more to do with childhood obesity than fishfingers at snack time...

Build your own crumpet pizza would be my go to for this. Put some crumpets out, grated cheeses, sliced baby tomatoes, sweet corn, slices of mini pepperoni and let them make it them selves. A few minutes under the grill and they are good to go.

Sadly there is a very high number of obese children it isn't funny and yes there's a lot of over feeding going on.

Children who are a healthy weight at this age have their ribs visible. We are in a situation where we can't buy clothing for healthy children due to the growing need to facilitate over weight children.

Threads like these clearly show there is a huge issue in people having a clue what is an appropriate amount of food for a young child.

I suppose it depends on how active the children are. The OPs child sounds quite busy?
Being a child of the 70s, my favourite house to go and play in was devoted to Mr Kipling. They used to have a huge spread just for afternoon tea (jam tarts, Battenberg, Fondant Fancies) plus hula hoops and skips. I would get as much as I could down my neck and was still skinny as a rake. Good old days. I miss Mr K..

I'd serve nuggets or something similar. They're there to play and be given something you know they will eat. A lot of kids would not go near cottage pie. I'm not cooking up a storm that will in all likelihood go to waste. We all know what kids should be eating but in reality we all know what kids are like.

If it isn’t their main meal, but just a snack, I’d cut up various fruits and let them make fruit skewers.

if I had them in, I would offer alternatively houmous and veggie sticks and cheese (assuming not allergic).

Best plan however is to ask the other parents what they would normally give/would they be happy with what you are offering.

Just some sandwiches, biscuit and a warm drink then rather than a double dinner.

Tomato soup and cubes of cheese.