To wonder if obesity is unattractive to most men?

[FlippertyFlopperty]

Since I've put on weight I barely get any attention from men. It's so unattractive isn't it? I'm feeling like I'll be single forever.

Does anyone have any experience of successfully meeting a significant other and being overweight?

I think when you get to a very unhealthy weight (whether you are male or female) you are perceived as less attractive. This is not really surprising, we have evolved to seek out a healthy partner as a way to increase the chance of healthy offspring.

However within the healthy range there are plenty of men who prefer curvier/heavily built women - you don't have to be a size 8.

Are you, yourself, attracted to obese men?

I think this is what matters when it comes to being physically attractive is physical proportions.

If you are proportionate or an hourglass shape this is more attractive than, say, a woman with skinny arms and legs but a big belly, or very large hips and legs and a small top half. I am not trying to offend anyone.

Me ex SIL was big but she had a lovely face and was very attractive. She didn't carry any weight on her face - didn't have a double chin - which I think also makes a difference how you are viewed when it comes to being overweight.

The images that someone put on here earlier all had hourglass figures and faces with no double chins. And they are attractive,.

I am a size 18/20 now and about 4 stones overweight. I am also in my 60's and struggle to lose weight.

Each to their won I suppose. Just my POV.

Apols for poor grammar

This. I know its an old saw but loving yourself as you are is the important thing

Exactly. I am a man and I find all of the women in the pictures that were posted earlier extremely attractive. Fabulous figures but all exuding confidence too. If you've got it, flaunt it.

This is good advice @Thatsmefatty .

Society is far too aggressively geared towards belittling weight but there are far worse traits than being cuddly. A couple of my dearest friends struggle with weight. They are magnificent people. I can’t sing their praises highly enough in terms of how giving and strong they are for those around them. I also know a handful of small-minded, small waisted types who are so self-absorbed they probably wouldn’t help a toddler across a road safely.

Just keep it in perspective when judging yourself.

I would say that many people are not particularly attracted to truly obese people.
It’s not just men.
BUT obviously many/most overweight people have happy? Loving marriages etc.
In my opinion it’s much more about confidence, how you feel about yourself and how you project yourself.
If you believe you’re attractive, then lots and lots of other people will believe it too.

Says more about them than you 99. Why would you want to make yourself more attractive for male approval? Do it for yourself, hold your head up and be proud to be a woman. These men should be lucky you even acknowledge them in passing.
A lot of men don't worry about making themselves more presentable for women, imo it is mainly men who have b.o and look as if they need a good wash, clean clothles and a decent razor.

Obviously a lot of people don't find obesity attractive in men or women Some do however. I am a bit surprised at the OPs surprise.

Men will shag anything but might be more fussy over who they commit to.

No men won't 'shag anything'
Most men still need a visual stimulus to get aroused, and for a lot of men an obese body won't provide this. Additionally, having sex with a woman who is obese can be awkward and difficult. Woman on top can be uncomfortable, from behind can be mechanically impossible depending on the size of the bum/thighs and likewise with missionary depending on the belly.

I’m a definite “larger lady” and encounter precisely zero of those issues.

My DP’s ex wife was 26 stone (I’m not quite that size), and they have my DSs together, so evidently managed.

I’m size 18-20 and my DP is tall and skinny. We met a couple of years ago and and while I don’t think he was particularly looking for a fat lass he certainly seems to find me attractive.

He has commented about being concerned for my health on occasion, but tbh he’s had his own health issues lately, so I think he realises he may not be quite the shining example of good health that he seemed to think he was! He insists it isn’t anything to do with attraction, which is just as well, as I’ve pointed out my stretch marks don’t look any better without the padding behind them, my magnificent boobs lose their bountiful bounce and my face will look 10 years older if I lose weight, so I’m quite happy as I am.

Oh and no issues with sex thanks; I’m surprisingly bendy for a big girl, and he doesn’t have any trouble getting where he needs to be.

I’m not that confident going on top but I never have been tbh, big or small. I don’t know quite how big your arse needs to be for it to impede access from behind, but I can tell you 18-20 ain’t it.

🙄

Remind me if that Titania McGrath tweet,

‘If you only date people you are attracted to, you need to ask yourself why you are so shallow and bigoted’

I think there will be more women that find obese men unattractive than there are men that find obese women unattractive. Some men are in to a larger woman as they prefer curves. There may also be something about not feeling the need to have the perfect body themselves.
Obesity can look very different on people too, I've known obese women who have very pretty faces, dress well and are confident and fairly fit. I've seen them get male attention. I've also known obese women who struggle with their mobility and wear plain baggy clothing, they don't get much attention.

I’m v turned off by gym rats and people who play a lot of sport so having a compatible lifestyle matters more to me than having the fittest body. Taking care of your body is attractive though.

I like men with a bit of chonk on them but I don't think it works both ways. Men tend to be shallow and see themselves as better looking than they actually are, in general I would say.