DD being petulant over DGP visit (18yo)

[Norzilla]

So I invited DGP over ( 78yo ) for Christmas this year. They went to DB last year. If they don't come here they will be alone this year. DD is outraged to have them here despite no real reason for it. She is 18yo at uni locally and still at home.
Tonight I had a huge row, explained DGP might only live another 15 years and least she can be is kind and empathetic to me and them. Much stropping ensued! DGP have their own room but will use the bathroom. I told her she was being rude and a brat. AIBU?

But if your and your DPs wishes make your dh and dc unhappy, sod 'em?

@DoreenonTill8

so OP should just acquiesce and put her wishes on the back burner once again for her others wishes to take precedence?

If 3 people would prefer one thing and 1 the other then majority rules would say you go with the 3

OP should just go to DB'S alone

@MartinCrieffsLemon

agreed.OP you leave your husband and kids home to do the cooking and cleaning up etc and you go to your brothers and have fun 🎄🥂🍸 woop!

I agree, but I’m not sure OP will be happy with that.

All the usual MN excuses in one go! The daughter is being a brat who doesn't get to say who her parents invite to their house. If we need a 'reason' or 'backstory ', she's an immature, ungrateful, petulant brat. Reasons enough there?

A phrase sadly underused!

Well you sound fucking delightful 😂😂

Thank you, you're very kind!

Your child is a brat. There is no excuse; is this how you're going to explain / forgive her life choices going forward?

I do find it amusing that so many feel that dc should rule the household or DH.
In other threads where a partner dictates for 18 years all say stand up for yourself/ controlling / arse hole. Yet here I am having untold vitriol from keyboard warriors because I want to have all my family including DGP and DB under the same roof for xmas as it has not happened for such a long time.
I am done posting as quite frankly it makes me feel like cr*p

Dd is behaving like a selfish brat. They can do this.. testing their muscle and testing your boundaries. Put a stop to it right now. Show dd who the bigger bitch in the house. You are. She finds some respect and good manners or looses some of the nice things she undoubtedly enjoys living at home with you like free phone bill or home cooked meals and laundry etc...

I see you’ve come back to the thread op and are unwilling to at least compromise on the view that as someone with possible autism she is finding the idea overwhelming.

That doesn’t mean that the plan should be completely thrown out but she’s certainly not a ‘brat’ as some have insisted. You show a very low understanding of autism from this post alone - there is no such thing as ‘high functioning autism’ to start with. If you approach her possibly additional needs from a place of anger, contention and a simple ‘well she has to learn’, you may find this is a start of a very slippery slope of miscommunication and arguments between you both.

Up to you how much of what I’ve said you take on board, but it comes from a place of personal experience both as an undiagnosed ND child/adult and as a parent of ND children.

As for this, both calling a possible autistic person a brat and the use of the word bitch in this context reflects very poorly on you. Neither the op nor her daughter are dogs in need of training, have some more respect for women at the very least.

This. Quite concerning to see all the nasty hate directed at her, and not once has op said 'hang on, don't call my daughter a bitch/brat/etc' but to use a mn trope 'you don't seem to like her very much' so am not surprised you haven't!

This original thread started as DD being “petulant”. Actually what I think you are saying is that she is echoing/copying what your DH is thinking and doing. Be really careful not to locate a problem which exists between you and DH in your daughter.