To go off sick the rest of the year and then resign?

[sometimesiwantto]

I am having a hard time and feel like I’m being totally screwed over by everyone but the worst thing is I know it isn’t deliberate, it’s just sort of how things have worked out.

I have two children, one preschool and one toddler. They are lovely children but obviously since they are so young they are very demanding and I don’t get a break with them.

I work three days a week. On the three days I’m in work I take them to nursery and pick them up. I then have the evening ‘shift’ after nursery because DH just doesn’t get back until after 7, and they are usually in bed or close to it by that time. He also leaves in the morning before nursery opens so can’t take them. This is because of the distance. Our jobs are demanding and mine isn’t any less so because I’m part time. On Fridays DH works from home but there isn’t a dramatic difference in my stress levels to be honest.

We are arguing, stressed, think both thing the other has it worse. There are DIY things that need doing around the house DH complains he has no time to sort, likewise I complain I have no time to do any housework.

I keep feelings as if things have to change and I just don’t know what to do. Leaving work seems very short sighted but I don’t know how we’ll survive otherwise to be honest

Haven’t read the full thread but didn’t want to read and run.
Someone else has probably suggested putting your children in for an extra day of childcare so that one of your non working day becomes child free would help a great deal.
We have children close together in age, I work part time but every day and OH works 6 days a week, and when they were similar age to yours it was exhausting especially as one never slept all night.
Thing that saved my sanity was keeping them in childcare for a couple of hours longer then I worked, so I could go home, whizz the hoover around, chuck food on etc then pick them up so that after they had gone to bed the evening was a few hours peace and quiet to rest.

Haha let’s all do that … then where will the country be!

HI OP
I am really unsure if you are mentally unwell and need to speak to your GP for medication and referral to talking therapy (cring, overwhelm, short temper) or if you are just not really coping with life; with working, 2 small kids, unhelpful DH, domestic stuff etc
You dont really mention work which concerns me given your role as a teacher. Depending on what you teach and what year group this could really impact the children in your care. Ask your head teacher or deputy head for a chat and to be really honest with you. Is this a career you are A: Good at and B: want to continue in
My kids have had teachers leave during the year and I have been annoyed and complained and said that teachers should only leave during the year for valid reasons like severe illness as it really impacts on kids learning with things like GCSE;s, A Levels etc

Lots of others on here have offered suggestions which you bat away which is frustrating.
There is no magic wand and you will need to make some choices, either to stay stressed or to improve things.
Try a cleaner again
Declutter the unecessary so what you have is what you need

You say that one of your children wont be put down which makes it hard to get things done but children feed of adults so if they sense the stress they will behave accordingly
Do you have a friend or family member you can ask for some really honest advice and opinions from?
I am concerned that you also wont enjoy being a SAHM, I loved it but found myself unusual in the lack of complaining about it. However I also never truly stopped working and I worked clinically at weekends.
Your husband is also a factor with not just communication issues, you are suposed to be a team, highlight this to him and work as a team.
Stop being a martyr, stop doing all the pick ups and drop offs, he can easily do one way on a friday its only 30 minutes of his time

I dont want to be negative but currently your kids go to bed at 7 so you do have some evening time, in a few years your evening will be full of activities (sports, scouts etc) and therefore more pick ups and drop offs will be needed

I really hope you can make some decisions and that things improve for you and also for your family

I think clearly your mental health is suffering, sounds like you aren’t very well due to lives stresses.

Unfortunately it’s life, life is stressful juggling kids, the home, yourself, work but then that doesn’t help you. You need to sit down and really look at what can change to help. Leaving your part time job however demanding it is isn’t a long term solution. Yes you are removing one stress that in turn may lighten your load in other areas but in turn that will potentially cause other stresses. Decrease in income, and more everyday life stresses being a stay at home parent brings. It’s rewarding yes but can be lonely and also stressful in itself.

You need to discuss this with your employer be honest in how your mental health is being affected and maybe they can look at your hours. Going off sick will not help you I the long run.