When you see me doing this I'm really ..

[VictorianMother]

I live on a busy road. When I leave my home I wave at the front window to make it look like I'm saying bye to someone but there's no one home. I think I'm trying to deter possibly burglars from thinking no one is home.

I'm sure I'm tricking no one 😆

When I'm taking my time washing or drying my hands in a public loo, I'm really waiting for someone to come in the main door so I can hook my foot or elbow on the door to exit so I don't have to touch the handle.

When I'm on a phone call in my garden it's because I don't want to speak to my neighbour who monopolises the conversation and will talk for an hour about her dog. I'm not on a call but talking to myself. Sometimes i laugh whilst on "the call".

My husband thinks I've lost it.

I have a few more....

Are there things you do that you're covering for other things?

Well you’re certainly busy with your foibles and quirks.
in comparison I’m more prosaic, no hidden depths,funny waves or hooked elbow

If you live on a busy road, surely potential burglars will be impeded in trying to get through your door or in a window by lots of passersby? Or bored by your monologuing neighbour as they case the joint? And why not just pull your sleeve down so you don’t need to touch the door handle of public loos?

All good points

But I mean, go for it! Put a cardboard cut out Darth Vader in the kitchen window, develop an invisible friend who lives in your garden to fend off the neighbour and bring a she-wee fin order to avoid public loos?

More good points 😁

Possibly thinking using a she wee browsing the knicker section after a M&S coffee may be frowned upon, but these days, who knows.

Since I was a child, I've snapped chocolate bars, poked cakes, squashed packets of biscuits & crisps in supermarkets. I don't do it regularly, but when the urge happens, I just can't stop myself. It's like a compulsion

When I lived alone, I used to cheerily call “see ya, Holly- call me if you want anything from the shops” as I locked the front door behind me.

Holly was my pet rabbit.

😂😂😂

Ohhhh naughty. Hav3 you ever been caught

Maybe I'll get a pet rabbit. It can watch from the window with Darth Vadar

On the rare occasion I hafe a day off and I walk back into my house after the school run and I know no-one else is in, I shout "hello I'm back" to the empty space and take absolute pleasure in the silence.

I always find snapped chocolate.

Imagine if you heard a "hello" back😬

No, I haven't. And all the while I've been doing it, I've never thought it an odd thing to do, until I told OH, and I realised it is actually very odd. He just laughed & wasn't shocked😂

It’s the Bread gropers that give me the heave ho. They molest the Bread and move on afther their fingers have probed the sourdough and poked the baguette

I often do the same in a public loo and with a mobile phone, not talking but pretend texting - I just do a random text in notes and then remove it.

Bread gropers 😆

Maybe you live near me🤭

So you don't have to touch the handle?

When I'm looking at my phone in public I really don't want to say hello to someone I've just seen

Why 'pretend' text?

Oh God no, I never do that. I get incensed when I see people doing that😡

Yup. I do this. I'm glad it's not just me. Why don't I just say hi, I don't know.

When I'm taking my time washing or drying my hands in a public loo, I'm really waiting for someone to come in the main door so I can hook my foot or elbow on the door to exit so I don't have to touch the handle

Tissue or sleeve, you daft hayporth.

I should mention. I only do it when no tissue or sleeve available