Boyfriend has just unveiled an awful mustache?

[Celia24]

My boyfriend has a nice short beard with I suppose a mustache included but you don't really notice it.

He asked me a while ago how I'd feel about a mustache and I said I wouldn't be crazy about it and wouldn't really find it attractive.

Well today he told me he had a surprise for me for November. He's just sent me a photo - he's shaved off his beard and fashioned this god awful mustache. I dont like it and it immediately gives me the ick.

He's clearly looking for a compliment but I bloody hate it. AIBU?

I could cry I've reacted so badly looking at it!

Is it for Movember? ie just for raising money for charity this month then he’ll shave it off?

Is he doing a silly one for Movember?

The thing is he hasn't SAID what it's for.

I feel like he's trialling it with me to keep it

I loathe it

Sounds like he's doing it for Movember? Is he being sponsored especially if it's an objectively horrible one? Can't you just say "oh that's hilarious, no one else will beat that, how much have you raised so far?" If it's not, you've told him it's horrible in an innocent misunderstanding kind of way...

This is what it will be, OP.
don’t worry.

The worry I have is he said he fancied having one and I told him straight I don't find them attractive.

This was last month

It's ok you are allowed not to like them.

Let's say I ask and he says he might keep it beyond November. What then?

I told him I found them unattractive so this is quite a big deal to me if so.

Don't talk about how unnattractive the moustache is. Talk about how sexy men with clean shaven upper lips/a beard/whatever he had before are. Or how nice it is to kiss men with stubbly faces etc. Honey rather than vinegar

Its truly awful.

The sides are turned down like a sad face.

Play him at his own game and photoshop a photo onto a selfie and send it to him with -

'Oh darling, I've been wanting to show you mine ...'

I get what you're saying I find moustaches repulsive.

He’s a Movember Dickhead.

It’s not for charity, it’s for attention.

Oh God you have my sympathies. DH doesn't deliberately grow a moustache but the hair on his upper lip grows back wayyy darker and thicker than the rest of his stubble, and he's quite hairy anyway... so a couple of days without shaving and he has a noticeable 'tache. I find it repulsive and happily tell him so. If he actually did it deliberately and insisted on keeping it I would honestly consider leaving him and we've been married five years. I'm not superficial at all, I'm no model and nor is he but deliberately doing something you know makes you deeply unattractive to your partner is in itself deeply unattractive!

If he’s told you that it’s for November I’d just reply something like “Oh. See you in December then!”

That should make your feelings clear enough. 😂

You need to be honest. That doesn't mean you need to be cruel, but genuine feedback might prevent him being considered a knob by 99% of people he meets.

What would you want him to do/say if he hated your haircut?

If it's for charity, offer to make a donation if it goes on November 30th. Either way, be honest.

So many men look awful with beards or just a moustache, he may not realise it is anything abnormal.

There will be lots of blokes at work doing Movember and I’m dreading it. They all look so creepy and i can’t look at them

How would you react if he told you he found your hair/nails/shoes/lipstick/hairy or shaved vulva unattractive? I bet you'd rightfully tell him to do one. You don't own his appearance and he is free to do whatever he feels like doing with it whether you like it or not.
I'd be traumatised if my partner shaved his beard but I certainly wouldn't throw a hissy fit over it. After all, he is still the man I love with or without facial hair.

@Icedbear he actually asked me to grow my hair a bit longer recently and I decided I would skip my next appointment just to indulge him until Christmas.

I don't think I'll bother now!

I told him how unattractive it was last month. I even told him I declined a date with another guy online before we met because I couldn't get past the mustache. And now he gets one?

He will soon think about changing it when he realises you aren't interested in kissing or anything else while those caterpillars are crawling over his face....

@Catza but we're all attracted to certain things. Are we all just supposed to change our preferences to suit the other person?

I personally am not impressed he's done it when he knows I hate them. I don't find it attractive and that IS a problem (sexually).

He once told me he didn't like a particular hairstyle

You can do whatever the hell you like, except telling another person how to look. Your choices are either to stop objectifying him or find someone else to date.