To not go to a wedding of a man I've never met?

[Youthiswastedontheyoung]

Adult niece (in-law). Never met fiance.
I'm more than happy for my husband and daughter to attend (and quite rightly so), but personally feel one shouldn't attend a wedding/invite someone to a wedding of someone whom they have never met.
AIBU?

You're not attending a strangers wedding! Why are you so focused on the partner, when you've been invited to attend your niece's wedding?

Honestly, the amount of posts on here about people NOT being invited to a wedding. The etiquette is that you invite guests spouses/long term partners.
Loads of people get married and have people in their lives they don't see as a couple. Or add plus ones to invites who could end up being strangers to both of them. If you don't want to go, don't. But that is a rubbish, bizarre excuse!

It's not a strangers wedding, it's your niece's.

I find this very odd. If you don't want to go, don't go, it's an invitation not a summons and all that. But really weird take.

Has your husband met the groom? If not why is it ok for him to attend and not you? It would be perfectly normal for you to be invited as his wife by the way, even if you had never met the niece either.

is she the daughter of your husband's brother or sister?

Is it actually your relationship with them that's causing your hesitation @Youthiswastedontheyoung?

But your niece will?

@ForGreyKoala Surely each wedding guest incurs expense? So in essence I'm expecting them to pay for a stranger?

its kind of one of these social engagements where it doesn't really matter if you do or don't know the person well. they have though enough of their uncle and his family to extend an invitation to their wedding... and i assume there will be other family members there that you do know, like your husbands brother, the father of said neice? it's a chance for family to get together... your response is very odd

Again, OP, that was your choice for your wedding. Other people’s idea of ‘perfect’ is two guests or 200. This couple don’t need to consult you on whether their guest list meets your approval.

If you simply don’t want to go, own that!

I had not met all of DH aunts and uncles before our wedding, and he hadn't met mine. He also invited friends that I hadn't met, I did the same.

Also been to several weddings where I only knew one half of the couple

@thursdaymurderclub Husband's sister. I know her a little.

Oh my word you're obtuse.

Go or don't go, but only go if you can bebe pleasant about it. And not bang on abou how the groom is a stranger or how surprised you are to be there

It's not a stranger, it's the relatives of the man you married. Honestly we moan about people being antisocial nowadays and staying at home too much and now you have in-laws inviting you to a special day and you think that's strange? Some people want very intimate weddings as you did but others want lots of people, and see it as a day in bringing together family from near and far. It might be a good way to get to know his family more.

How does you husband feel about your attitude towards it?

Just don't go, I don't see the big fuss or the need for a thread about it. You've made up your mind.

You don't seem to understand how invitations work. Someone chooses who they invite, those chosen people then choose if they go. There is no ancient formula or algorithm behind it. You have been invited by someone, go or don't go. No one here cares.

yeah.. there's a drip feed here!

@thursdaymurderclub Not really. Husband and I married later in life.

It's surely their choice, to pay for their family (whoever that entails) rather than you're expectation.
Personally I think it would be more strange to invite your DH without you!

But it's completely normal for people to be invited to a wedding and to be told to please bring a 'plus 1' who may have not ever met either the bride or groom?! How can you not have come across that? My brother is getting married next year and he and his fiancé have told my daughter, (his only niece), to please bring a friend so she won't be on her own. They've never met her friend, but so what? They want my daughter to be comfortable and to have company her own age. It's really not that weird!!

I e attended quite a few where I've not known either, usually as a plus one.

Oh my God you can't say that! Are you neurodivergent by any chance OP?

My wedding had 2 people, me and DH. A couple of witnesses but only because we had to. Why would I want 17 other people there, I'm not marrying them?

(This is just as batshit as your response btw)

@TheFormidableMrsC I've never met the guy!!!!

You're only expected to attend as a guest.

You don't need to have sex with him.

Don't be too harsh on the OP, perhaps it wasn't made clear in the Invitation?

@Eminybob Because I knew them all well. They were not people I'd never met before.