To decline to answer what school my child goes to?

[Icicle90]

I sometimes get strangers asking what primary school my son goes to if the topic comes up in conversation and I always prefer not to answer just from a safety and privacy POV. For example the hairdresser today asked and a few weeks ago, someone else that I don't know that well asked.
Is it weird to just say I prefer to keep his personal information private when someone asks?

What on earth do you think will happen? You’re in for a difficult road if you’re this precious about such an ordinary detail at this stage.

It’s very weird

Yeah it’s a bit weird to say “I prefer to keep his personal information private” when someone asks.

Obviously you’re not gonna reveal it to a random man on the street, but if it’s another woman who you’re already having a conversation with, I honestly can’t see the harm. Seems a bit precious.

But people on social media blank out their kids school jumper logos , I've seen it

Does he have an increased need for security?
Is he adopted?
There will be some circumstances where privacy is important.
If there is a reason for this concern then it makes sense to say this.
If you said this to me I would probably assume he was or had been in the care system.

Yeah because that’s a picture on the internet, that can be shared and distributed. Digital footprint and all.

But you do you OP.

He has special needs and I just don't want anyone knowing his business, it's a small town

Is your hairdresser a stranger on social media? No. Don’t be ridiculous, OP.

In my coubtry, city is is usually asked for your status in area or schools cos people are small minded, nosy.
Hairdresser would be ok, stranger probably not.

Oh I know someone who teaches at that school! Yes, she said that so many children are coming into school without xyz and it's soon disruptive. Does yours do that?

Oh - do you know x? Her son is in the same year as yours. Her kid is soooo advanced, is reading age ABC, what one is yours on?

Oh no!! How are you getting on with the head? So much bullying going on there. I'm not saying yours is a bully or that they aren't telling you they are having a horrific time in school but they just failed the ofsted report didnt they.

Just a few examples of what you open yourself up to.

I agree - bit precious

If it's a small town, there'll only be a limited number of options for primary schools so if someone was intent on foul play, they could find out easily enough. People are asking to make conversation and to get to know you - they're being friendly.

Like others if you were saying you wanted to keep his information private I would think your DS was adopted. It's worth remembering that a deflecting answer to a normal question will raise more eyebrows and be more memorable than a quick " He goes to St Elsewhere's".

😂😂 That’s so cringe. What do you think your hairdresser is going to do - kidnap your son? It comes across as a bit attention seeking or just being difficult for the sake of it. Children in the UK wear school uniforms which clearly display where they go anyway! Ridiculous.

People only ask to make small talk - I honestly don’t think anyone genuinely cares about the ‘business’ of a random primary school aged child.

I once disclosed my child's school, in small talk, to a tradesman, and it ended badly, so I'm sorry to admit that yes, now, I would try and keep my mouth shut in future.
I was victim to a shocking situation whereby the tradesman demanded money with menaces from me, and was extremely threatening towards me. He took me in his van to the cash machine, and made me withdraw the max amount and hand it over to him.
As you can imagine, the fact he knew where my child went to school gave him an edge over me, meaning I was more likely to comply with his demands.
So yes, OP, keep your life private.

My son goes to a special needs school and I understand that feeling. I felt it too but now I say it proudly, XYZ school, it’s a fantastic special needs school in ABC town. Own it and you and your son will feel more comfortable.

Your hairdresser doesn't give a rat's arse which school you son goes to. She was just making conversation to pass the time.

The same as when she asked if you have any nice holidays planned; she's not planning to lead the local burglar to your front door.

In a small town everyone knows anyway.

Don't be ridiculous.

Weird

It's hardly a state secret, is it?

@Changethetoner wow, that's awful, so sorry you had to go through that and yes I'm sure you wish you hadn't said what school your child went to but I'm sure you never imagined the man would be such a psycho!

I live in a small town and know what school most children go to without speaking to their parents. For primary the direction they're walking will tell you which school and secondary all the school blazers are different.

My hairdresser asked me today what secondary school my daughter wants to go to this morning. It's just small talk which she's doing hair, she doesn't actually care.

If you're not going to answer I would suggest finding ways to deflect while maintaining a friendly conversation.
'Oh gosh, I am not here to talk about the kids, this is the only time I get to talk about grown up things! Have you seen the new Netflix series...'
'Oh are you trying to choose a school for your child? How old are they?'

Yes, it's weird if you're doing it out of paranoia that someone will kidnap him.

People blur logo out on social media but not when walking down the street! That’s the difference OP!

I don’t think you need to tell people what school your child goes too if you don’t want too, it doesn’t exactly have anything to do with them