To think having children isn’t an accomplishment?

[RealGreyLemur]

It feels like society places so much emphasis on having kids as if it’s some grand achievement, but I don’t see it that way. AIBU to think that having kids shouldn’t be treated as an accomplishment in itself?

Having kids isn’t a notable accomplishment but raising them well is.

100% this

Yep this

👏👏👏

No it's not an accomplishment.

All it means is you've had sex that resulted in a pregnancy.

But as the PP said, raising them well definitely is.

An accomplishment is something that has been achieved successfully. I think raising kids well counts.

Agree with PP.

Yep!

Whilst it is a miracle for some. It amusing me how people make out birth is a miracle, that's a hell of a lot of billions of miracles.

Bringing up children well is an achievement, any old idiot who is fertile can knock feral ones out.

No it's not.
Alot of people that's all they do, and all they say about themselves.
More to life much more.
If you don't do anything else but have children it's pretty boring.

It’s a huge accomplishment for the human body. Possibly one of the greatest feats it can perform. And women deserve recognition for doing this Labour. It also, in a lot of cases ( but not in all, obviously) means a couple have began building a successful, stable, relationship in which they love and support each other. This is also an achievement that can be celebrated.

Not all accomplishments have to be bourne of rare talent or be original. Not all have to be capitalist pursuits.

I've spoken to adults who are otherwise content, healthy and employed who have one or both parents ashamed of them because they aren't doing the job the parents dreamed off.

It's a milestone which people celebrate. Just like a birthday or getting married. People make a fuss, not because it's an impressive achievement, but just because it's usually a lovely thing to have a new baby in your family. Do you get snarky about people celebrating their 21st birthday for example? I'm sure not.

Being a decent parent is an achievement as a pp said but just having a baby or inpregnating someone isn't necessarily. Still nice to celebrate it

No, it’s not any sort of achievement to bear and give birth, Good rearing can be an achievement though.🙂

I remember seeing part of a documentary years ago about the human body. I think it was by Michael Mosley and was called something like ‘how I was made’ or ‘what made me’ or something. Anyway, when they went in to what actually has to happen, stage by stage for a healthy a baby to be conceived, grown and born it honestly DID seem a little miraculous that any of us actually exist. And that’s just one baby. Thousands of years of your ancestors managing to do this over and over in order to pass in their DNA? That’s a lot of efffort, a lot of work, a lot of luck. And I’m not one to get caught up in the sentimentality of babies and childbirth - I had complex caesarians with both mine. Both labours were complete shit shows!

I don’t think it’s an achievement that other people need to celebrate (rather like I don’t need to GAF about you getting on the property ladder or having a promotion), but I’m pleased for myself.

Absolutely this, as just about anyone can have kids (of course excluding those who have had fatality issues). But raising them well requires a lot of time and effort.

The question is poorly worded, surely you are not referring uniquely to the actual birthing of babies?
Because the act of having and raising children is a huge burden , physical emotional, monetary and is a huge benefit to society. So in this sense yes it is an accomplishment.
It may not be something everyone chooses to do and that is perfectly acceptable. However people should respect and recognize that those who do assume this responsibility make an irreplaceable contribution to society .

I think building a stable family unit is an accomplishment. Working on a relationship, employment, achieving a position that allows you to plan and have a child, raise it, and keep everything afloat is an achievement that doesn’t come without sacrifice and discipline and a bit of good luck.

That’s what people aim for, I think.

The bloke with the names of 6kids tattooed up his arms, all of them adopted out, has less to celebrate.

Whilst it may seem miraculous it clearly isn't seeing there are billions of people on the planet now and have existed.

Why can’t it be an achievement?

I don’t have kids, having kids sounds hard so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to see having kids as an achievement.

Just like I don’t get why anyone would want to run a marathon, seems a waste of time to me but I also recognise that’s it’s hard to do and so I would consider it an achievement.

I have had several losses in pregnancy, one due an abnormality that wasn't compatible with life.
So for me having managed to have 2 healthy children after this feels like a huge accomplishment!
But that's just me and my circumstances! And I am very grateful for my 2 human beings that are all okay physically etc.

I had complex caesarians with both mine. Both labours were complete shit shows!

@Icannoteven If you look back at history the fact you and your children are alive is a miracle in itself.

Going through multiple rounds of invasive fertility treatment, that then results in a baby is an incredible medical achievement...

But otherwise, no, I agree, it's the bringing them up that's the challenge.

Just out of curiosity OP, do you have children yourself?