To not like being called by forename by kids

[BreakingDad77]

I don't know but somehow it feels odd when sons friends year 6 age range calling me by my forename. I haven't said anything but part of me feels I would prefer Mr surname or "sons name - dad".

They're usually arseholes.

Are you calling the dc by their 'proper name'? As in to the dc friends...
"Welcome to my home Master Till8? Would you like a beverage?

The kids don’t know me in a professional setting and I am not a leadership figure in their life (teacher etc.) so I would expect to be addressed by my first name.

I teach at the school where both my DC went, and their friends never knew what to call me when at our house. I'd say "call me <firstname>" and of course they never did.

what do you want them to call you? 'so & so's dad?' its your name! tell the friend what you want to be called! you need to get over yourself... otherwise eventually all his friends will just call you 'asshole' something else!.

Yeah this is weird unless they're talking about you when you're not there. And Mr such and such is way too formal for children. First name is totally normal and appropriate.

my DD is a TA and she's called 'Miss Accident' because the kids can't get their tongues round her actual name!

Loving the resurgence of Balonz references this week.

It may be a need for status. But it’s not linked to being a teacher. I’m one. My DD’s friends - who at secondary went to the school I taught at - called me by my first name outside school. Same with all my teacher friends.

I was a teacher Mrs X was my work name. At home I was known by my first name. If I knew a child in both places they could remember which name applied.

I'm in my mid 70s and and perfectly happy with my grandchildren's friends calling me by my first name.

My children's friends always called me by my first name. I would have hated for them to call me Mrs Smith (not my name) or Johns mum, which sounds ridiculous.

My next door neighbour, when my children were growing up, always referred to herself as aunty Joan; something that I hated and strongly discouraged my children from calling her, which they never did.

Perhaps you're still of the same mindset as my old fashioned neighbour and think children should show 'respect' by calling adult acquaintances aunty or uncle.

Very odd.

If that's what you want, then let the kids know.

It's not difficult

What are they supposed to call you?!

It did seem strange at first when their friends called me by my first name (I come from a time when you’d never have done that). But as the friends got older they didn’t call me anything at all (just a quick hello then back to their socialising).

I think it's pretty standard to use the first name now if you know it, but it's also situational - for example, if you're a teacher at your children's school, or the local GP, they're probably going to go on calling you "Mr. Lastname" until you invite them to use your first name. If they've just met you through your son/their friend, how do they even know your first name? If it's really important to you, have your son introduce you as "my Dad, Mr. Lastname" (potentially a little awkward in some demographics) or just "this is my dad - Dad, this is my new friend Trevor". Trevor will likely address you as Mr. Yourkidslastname as he won't know what else to use. Which could be an issue itself if you don't have the same last name as your child(red).

It would literally never even occur to me to suggest that my children call anyone other than their school teachers "Mr X" or "Mrs Y" nits not 1955!!!

I think this is a pretty old fashioned opinion.

I've had to be called Mrs. X by my DCs friends - they all call me by my real name. I mean I don't call them Miss Smith and Master Jones do I ?

Gosh that really is quite informal. Usually a school principal will do it because it reinforces distance - and sometimes having someone who isn’t unkind but inspires a respect is useful in a school. Same as calling teachers Sir or Miss.

Growing up I definitely would have said “Hello Mrs Harris” to a friends mum or “ Mrs Manning would it be ok, please, to borrow your phone to call my mum ?” ( yup no mobiles in early 90’s! ) I never felt subjugated it uncomfortable or any other nonsense.

I don’t especially mind but have to say I really ( REALLY) double took when my first Dc was in nursery and a little friend aged about 2.5 addressed me by my first name. His mum didn’t react at all and I realised that’s how it’s going to be as a mum now. As I say I didn’t mind, but would have preferred to be asked ( is it ok if Tony calls you {Anna?}) and was taken aback not to be. They even ask on many phone calls ( to telephone company etc) “ is it alright if I call you {Roberta}?” And my bank and gp surgery always use my (and everyone’s) surname so it’s not that outlandish or archaic.

I had a few of my mums friends that I called Aunty and Uncle, I thought it was really common. I was born in the 80's so I wonder if it still is now?

When I was about 9 years old, back in 1966, I called a friend's mum by her forename. I don't know what the hell got into me because it really was unheard of back then. She "reported" me to my parents who gave me a massive telling off. Flash forward to the the mid 80's when my own son was about the same age and all of his friends called me, and other mums, by their forename. So, things changed at least 40 years ago and you are being very old fashioned indeed. I also think you will embarrass your son if you insist on this. Are you married? Do his friends call your wife "Mrs"? Is this just a male thing?

I have never had a friend of my children call me Mrs …I would actually find it really bizarre! Friends daughter has a boyfriend that insists in calling her Mrs blah blah and she finds it infuriating! She has told him so many times what her preference is .

A lot of cultures do this. It’s to signal that an that an adult is closer than an acquaintance but without calling them by their first name.

I think, again, so long as everyone asks “ is it ok if I call you/you call me x?” It’s quite a nice tradition.

Only in the UK.. 😩 Our principle came to say hello today and the children waved happily and said hi, using her nickname.

There is not a single person in my country who anyone would call anything else than their first name.

This always confuses my students! I teach a musical instrument, on the project I deliver in primary schools all the project teachers are first name. All my private students call me by my first name. I have a few left over that I now teach privately who I initially taught at a grammar school where they had to use my surname and I don’t think they know what to call me! All my kids’ friends (4-7) it’s immediately first name.