Who is bu regarding lifts?

[Nostalgianostalgic]

There are two people. Gordon and Billy.

Billy is giving Gordon a lift regularly. That's fine and Billy doesn't mind at all under the circumstances. Without going into it all it's a reasonably arrangement.

But when Billy goes to pick Gordon up Billy texts Gordon just as he's leaving to say "on way". It's a 2 minute drive away.

When Billy arrives, he's having to wait several minutes for Gordon to come out to the car and is getting annoyed.

Gordon says that Billy should text again to say that he's there, but Billy thinks as he's helping Gordon, that Gordon should be ready and waiting at the door.

Who is bu?

I’m wondering more about the posters on other late threads who say they’re ‘time blind’ or can’t cope with being early because of issues like ADHD or anxiety & maybe wouldn’t be capable of getting ready to go at the first text.

But the first text isn't a 'get ready' message. It's a 'get out of the door' message. You don't start to get ready when you know your lift is 2min away. You should be ready, shoes on, bag and coat by the front door, and just checking the news headlines or your e-mail or something while you wait for the text.

I know! And that’s exactly what I’d be doing. Just speculating.

Billy needs to drive off if Gordon isn’t there. Gordon will then learn.

A similar scenario ensued once when I got sick of waiting for my then teenage DD to get in the car. Every morning I’d go and get the car out of the garage at the same time and end up sat for 15 minutes whilst she faffed in the house. I spoke to her about it. I got cross. Nothing worked.
until one morning after 15 minutes I simply left without her and she had to walk.
seemed to have the desired effect. Never waited for her again.

The reasonable person would go outside to wait on the roadside for the car as soon as they received the text saying he was on his way.

If I were Billy I'd be telling Gordon that I'm fed up with waiting around and that if he's not at the roadside I'll be driving on without him.

If they have an arranged time, then instead on texting to say on way. Billy should just text- I'm ready/here// be outside when he's leaving. Pre-emt the faff

Gordon is an ungrateful idiot who does not recognise when he is onto a good thing. Billy is a wuss for putting up with it.

If the texting arrangement doesn’t work for Gordon, he can always get the bus and he’ll be able to track its arrival probably.

GIAM as Jilted John would say.

I'm assuming Billy is picking Gordon up to give him a lift to a joint hobby/sport or something similar?
If Billy picks him up at the same time every week then Gordon knows full well what time to be ready for!
I'd be telling Gordon that he needs to be outside waiting.

Billy needs to grow some bullocks and tell Gordon he needs to be waiting for him outside or lifts will stop

Are you going to show Billy this thread, OP?

This 100%

This would do my head in, Billy needs to text Gordon when he leaves his house saying "I'm outside yours now"
If it only takes 2 mins to get there by the time Gormless Gordon has read it and got out of his house, Billy should just be arriving....
If someone is offering you a lift you have the good grace to be stood waiting to see their car pull up and get out of your house immediately.

"Gordon is a Moron" as the song goes"

If anyone is inconvenienced, it should be Gordon waiting outside or standing by the door ready to go.

That's what I used to do when being given a daily lift to work, no texting, no beeping, no knocking as I was always ready to go.

The poster who mentions what her DH has previously done for his work mate is exactly why I wouldn't want to be in this situation.
Being beholden for all your working life because someone gave you a reference, good grief!!

People are so entitled.

Also, my DSIS is bad at time keeping, unless it's something that would cost her money or big inconvenience.
Always on time for holidays, flights, doctors etc. It's a lack of respect for other people's time.

A friend had this with a close friend in his 80s. It was the start of dementia - he became increasingly paranoid and entitled, with delusions of grandeur. He had been a lovely man. Sad.

Billy should just tell Gordon that unless he is ready at the agreed time, he won't pick him up anymore and he won't be texting when he is outside.

Then it's up to Gordon what he chooses to do

Billy should text and say on my way 5 mins before he leaves

Then be late so Gordon is left waiting

This thread got med thinking...

It seems that if people get something for free, get a lift, borrow something, or otherwise have a favour done for them, it often seems to trigger a feeling of something, I can't quite determine. As if it shouldn't have to cost the recipient anything at all. No time, inconvience, either. I've been baffled when people want to borrow something quite expensive, but seem to think picking it up and returning it is too much hassle, and the owner should arrange for them to not have to go out of their way for that. People receiving a lift, but not wanting to waste time waiting for the driver to get there. Needing a favour, but becoming discouraged when it doesn't work out exactly how they wanted it with no trouble for themselves. Receiving something they'd like for free, but wanting the giver to either deliver it personally or paying for shipping costs. Yet when people pay a lot of money for something, they feel more comfortable also going out of their way to pick it up, or otherwise putting in the relevant work. I can't exactly pin down what it is - maybe it feels like the thing you're receiving is worth more if you pay for it, so going out of your way seems more fair? I don't think people are thinking this through or doing it out of malice, I think it's some sort of automatic reaction.

Gordon is BU but Billy should just start texting three minutes earlier.

Gordon is a moron

Gordon should be at the door ready to step out. Its just good manners. Who the fuck does he think he is?!

I think Gordon maybe in for a shock when Billy stops the lifts.

Is breá liom d'ainm úsáideora:-)

Who gives a shit!

Gordon. I had a Gordon and stopped giving lifts in the end as it was making me late. Same time every day. She was supposed to meet me at the entrance to the estate but more often than not I ended up outside her door texting here before I turned the car in the cul de sac. She would reply coming then I'd still be sitting there. After 5 minutes I rang the doorbell one day and she replied "can you not because it makes the dog bark and wakes my mum!!!!!" Soon put an end to that!