That makes me feel sad! Is this the new "be kind"

[10milliondollars]

Is this now a thing?

I've had a couple of disagreements recently with adults who like to push the boundaries when they don't get their own way - their response has been that makes me feel sad - is it me or is it such a weird thing to say to another adult you have a difference of opinion with - both adults had no right to their demands and I said I would not do what they wanted. Most people feel sad when they don't get their own way - but they don't lay the guilt on other people.

I think these people are being manipulative - AIBU.

Tell them to man the fuck up. Such a childish response.

Just respond, "I'm glad you feel despite our differences of opinion you're comfortable enough to express your feelings"

Leave it at that. They're entitled to their feelings as much as their opinion. You aren't responsible for either.

Oh this with bells on. That whole post you have quoted makes my skin crawl.We need a bit more resilience not all this ' naming feelings'.

That's what my son said to me earlier, clearly copied it from the teacher.

Maybe just say "well it's a good job you're an adult, and you're old enough to know, that's not going to make another adult change their mind!"

Trying to think of the appropriate rebuttal.

Is it:
"I'm sorry you feel that way"

Or is it:
"Okay, thanks for sharing that"

😅

Adults are becoming more and more childrenlike. We have a life of comfort so no wonder…

« I bet you do. »

« Ok. »

« Do you need a hug? »

Yes, you have misunderstood. As per the OP, this is about people using "that makes me sad" to manipulate others when they won't give them want they want.
What you are describing, though, is completely appropriate. This isn't about genuine emotions, but fake ones used for manipulation, because when somebody does that, their "sadness" is phoney.

Edit; posted by mistake. Apologies.

When they are being obviously manipulative;
"Would you like a tissue?"

My reply "aww sorry to hear that, however, its not my responsibility to make you better"

Absolutely. It's when the words are used to manipulate people that it becomes a problem, or used in an inappropriate setting like the workplace or when you're with people you don't know.

Me too!

@XChrome you're right, I did misunderstand and I'm quite reassured by your post thank you.

Having said that, I'm pretty sure a good number of comments here have also mis understood and are literally saying that the phrase 'I am sad' in any context is immature and over sharing. This is more alarming as I'm definitely on the side of appropriate sharing of emotions when needed.

My 2 and a half year old tells me this whenever I say no to her, she learned it at nursery alongside “kind hands” and “not a kind friend” and many other wise proclamations.

The rebuttals are getting better and better! 😂 Am noting more and more down!

"I can give you the name of a good grief therapist."

"I have antidepressants in my purse if you're interested."

"Will it go from sadness to PTSD the next time I see you?"

Yes, there have been some posts like that. They are best ignored, are probably bullies or at least wannabe bullies.

😂😂😂😂

Bollocks, it's nothing to do with "being uncomfortable with emotions" - it's recognising manipulative, dishonest therapy-speak. And if you want to bring nationality into it, as a PP pointed out, this is US therapy crap. You're also assuming everyone responding is British - nope!

And we have a right to be disinterested in their manipulative feelings.

I'm thinking, "that sounds like a you problem" seems an appropriate answer.

This reminds me of friends' 3 year old hitting my 2 year old with a stick. Friend said "that makes me feel sad". 3 y o completely unaffected.
So I took the stick away, and said "No hitting".
It's immature and manipulative.
Also I think I might laugh if an adult said that in all seriousness.

"That makes me feel sad"

"Don't talk to me like I'm a three year old. If you have an objection, say what it is."