Why is mumsnet so sexist?

[Lovefromjuliaxo]

Been on here a few months, and while it’s nice to see women sticking up for woman, it’s crazy how sexist some people are on here. I’ve seen threads telling a women to leave her partners name off the BC as revenge because he’s cheated, I’ve seen posts saying “not surprised about huw Edward’s, no men can control themselves” and other numerous anti male threads and posts.

im a female for reference.

curious to see peoples opinions

YABU- it’s not constantly sexist on here
YANBU- it is constantly sexist on here

Because “just leaving” is easier said and done when you have children and fully intertwined lives.

If misandry is so rife on here and you're so offended by it, why are you here?

@JHound

https://www.sec-ed.co.uk/content/best-practice/supporting-the-education-of-white-working-class-boys/

https://www.thebreaker.co.uk/why-are-white-working-class-boys-failing-academically/

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/nov/18/its-no-surprise-that-white-working-class-boys-do-badly-at-school?CMP=ShareiOSAppp_Other

Got the heads up from some MRA message board I guess. Maybe Reddit.

@JHound

Why do you find this hard to believe? I am a teacher and I cannot remember a time when this imbalance was not the case.
Nobody wants to invest in educational initiatives aimed at poor, white boys.
Jeremy Corbyn's sons attended the super selective London Grammar school for boys, Queen Elizabeth's.* About 92% of the current School pupil population are from Black, Asian and Minority Ethnic (BAME) backgrounds*. Like most grammar schools, poor white boys are very unlikely to gain places there. That statistic is duplicated all over the country.
It means that poor, white boys are unlikely to be represented in most professions and institutions. They have become a underclass. This is dangerous for lots of reasons. Exclusion of such groups is never a good idea.

@Lovefromjuliaxo

Mumsnet is not sexist. It's not a hive mind. Some posters may post sexist views. That is them, not MN.

Be more rigorous and don't generalise in your goady and totally mistaken thread title.

"It's women's fault for choosing bad men. Not said men's fault for being bad". Jog on incel/incel apologist.

It is women’s experiences which overwhelmingly include male harassment and violence which inform most here. No one starts out like that but we know how it goes..

I agree that the majority of violent and sexual crimes are committed by men. I also read about a lot of nasty partners and husbands in Mumsnet.

It's sad because pretty much all the men I know (DH, DF, FIL, DB and my male colleagues and friends) have been kind and respectful towards me so not all men are horrible.

Men also don’t usually kill, rape, threaten, intimidate, stalk etc

No one is saying they 'usually' do. People are saying that when these things do occur it's almost always men who are responsible. There is a difference between "most violent criminals are men" (statement of fact) and "most men are violent criminals" but the two keep being conflated because its easier to argue against the second than the first.

Where are the men campaigning for prostate cancer testing? For better mental health provision? Volunteering in youth organisations and schools to improve outcomes for boys and young men? Going to court to get better access to their children?Also speaking out against those violent men who commit more than 90% of violent crime. What are men DOING about all this?

Perhaps that is because the overwhelming majority of folk posting on those threads and saying "all men are like this" have also experienced years of being badly treated by the men in their lives, and have understandably become very cynical. Their reactions are due to their lived experiences. That in itself does not make their opinions sexist.

Urm. Asking women to do it for them?

@Fluufer "Urm. Asking women to do it for them?"

Indeed. It is usually at this point that the NAMALT-ers leave the discussion. Let's hope they don't this time.

i was merely quoting the PP who said 'most women' don't do these things, pointing out that most men don't do them either...a tiny fraction of either gender but agree more common by males (but still nothing close to 'most', far from it) precision in language matters.

I don't know. I'd wager that most (as in the majority, more than half) have in fact done one of those things. Intimidation and threatening behaviour is hardly unusual.

not my experience at all. but maybe that depends on region education class age nationality etc? none of the males in my friend groups / family have ever even been in a fight, let alone these egregious behaviours listed!

I didn't say fighting, and I didn't say all. Intimidating men are everywhere, whether you recognise it or not.

When they stop raping, murdering, enslaving, abusing and marginalising us, I imagine our attitudes towards them will begin to mellow. In the meantime, I have nothing but pity for women who feel the need to bleat about poor men and how hard-done-by they are. It's pathetic.

@HamptonPlace "not my experience at all. but maybe that depends on region education class age nationality etc? none of the males in my friend groups / family have ever even been in a fight, let alone these egregious behaviours listed"

The trouble is that we don't know what goes on behind closed doors. How often when it turns out a man has been abusing his partner do people say "I had no idea!"

I think people also see what they want to see... nobody likes to think of their dad or brother being horrid do they?

This ^^