To think sex noises sound ridiculous

[PeachyKeane]

I'm in a hotel bedroom peacefully having a cup of tea. Or was.... the couple in the room next door have just started having noisy sex. And the walls are thin. Lots of huffing, puffing, moaning and groaning.

AIBU to think sex noises sound utterly ridiculous 🙄

Some people can be a bit over the top, but I can't think of anything worse than silent sex. At least they are enjoying themselves. They should try to keep the noise down in a hotel, though, as that's it's a bit selfish if others are trying to sleep or if there are children.

Bang on the wall and say they are putting you off your tea.

Record it on your phone and play it back on full volume after they’ve finished and are having a cup of tea!

It’s not pleasant if you’re not involved,I agree! Do you think it’s all faked and forced?

Or perhaps you’ve got it wrong and they’re just trying to move their heavy suitcase. Or maybe she’s got a stomachache. 😄

Yeah it's ridiculous when in a hotel. It's a choice to make noise. If you know ppl can hear you then be quiet or you're just being weird

Maybe they’re just wrestling?

I agree, it sounds silly out of context, ie when you just hear the sound.

I own a holiday cottage attached to my house. I sometimes hear guests shagging and I can't bear it. Especially when I see them.later on the driveway! We've just got a hot tub and I'm dreading hearing them.having sex in that.
( before I get the comments about the hot tub it's an eco friendly one for two.people and the water is changed (and recycled) after every stay)

My late husband used to fast forward the sex scenes in tv shows (Game of Thrones became a mini-series, lol). But that made it worse, it’s ridiculous watching folk have sex in fast forward 🫨

I do wonder what people consider an acceptable/preferred level of noise.

Some revel in the 'enthusiasm'; louder suggests more enjoyment (or maybe just better at faking it), while quiet is seen by many (on MN) as offputting and weird.

I guess each to their own. What is the universal 'standard'? Are we talking slightly-louder-than-speech "oh yeah, that's good", or swearing with 'vigour'?

Put a scorecard under their door after.
Enthusiasm 8/10
Faking potential 9/10
Female intuition on enjoyment 3/10
Duration 5/10

Is this what is known as aural sex?

Play "Relax"

As you pass their door to go down to breakfast - slide a note under it saying "So obvious you faked that!!!"

I love sex noises. Better than hearing arguments. Doesn't it put you in the mood?

I mean it depends on the noise … full on porn moaning then yes it sounds silly, but I think some noise is normal.

Are you silent or do you just not get any?

I'd rather hear people having a shag than arguing or kids screaming or playing crap music at ten million decibels. We're nothing but mammals after all, at least most humans don't make sex noises like tortoises. THAT would be annoying.

It's a choice to be loud when in a place you know people can hear.

It doesn't bother me at all

This is why I can't work out why people love sex scenes in films and TV sounds like a hoover underwater or a monkey with haemorrhoids

This is the most British post ever

Its usually the woman making the noise as well

I think for lots of people when you have kids/roomates/live with parents etc staying in a hotel gives them the opportunity to let loose in a way they can't at home. Everyone needs to let loose sometimes.

I used to live next door to loud shaggers, but it was only ever the woman i heard which ked me to donder why? Are women conditioned to make more noise?