Uni flat dishes - who is in the wrong?

[Poiuytrewql]

DD is in her first year at a London Uni.

Her flatmates (and I’m sure DD) leave the sink full of dishes constantly. Not unsurprising. Student 1 made a bolognese and was going home for the weekend. The pan they washed got food bits and fat over the dishes that were left in the sink. Student 2 found this foul and printed off a note and stuck it to the door reprimanding this behaviour.

I believe my daughter is in the right but dh thinks she is not. Not sure if my bias for my child is clouding my judgement.

Who is in the wrong?

I don’t think Student 2 can get too worked up about someone washing up what they used, and in the process getting already dirty dishes a bit dirtier.

Well which one is your dd, 1 or 2?

The housemate who went home did their bit, and washed up their pan. They've done nothing wrong.

What were they supposed to do? Take everyone's dirty plates out the sink first? Or maybe wash up everyone's plates?

What was the reaction to the note and why was it written when the house mate had gone home? Surely someone washed up the plates before the housemate was back...

I think its to be expected if they are sharing a sink that some stuff will get on to the rest. Unless all students never leave any dishes in the sink whatsoever this will happen again in the future maybe from the other party this time. Either be forgiving both ways or agree to never leave any dishes moving forward otherwise no right to complain if your left dishes got stained :)

The student that cooked and then washed up her dirty pan is in the right.

The student who cba to wash her dishes, left them in the sink, and is now stropping that they are slightly dirtier than before is in the wrong.

You don't want bits of food on your dishes? Then wash them up and put them away like an adult.

Tell you dd and her mate to stop being scuzzy gits and wash the dishes after they've used them.

It's so fucking tedious having to deal with lazy housemates!

It seems perfectly simple to me. People who don't want bits of dirty dish water on their crockery need to not leave said crockery in the sink that several other people use.

I don’t miss these days!

Agree with PP that Student 1 did their part by cleaning up their pans before leaving. Not their fault everyone else left their shit in the sink.

They need to agree to wash up after eating. It’s annoying but it’s necessary when living with people making different meals constantly.

I wish more uni accommodations would supply dishwashers. Once I moved out of uni accom into flatshares we always had dishwashers and it was so peaceful!

This.

If food got on the dirty plates in the sink, that's a hint to wash your damned dishes and not leave them in the sink. If they're in the sink they will get crud on them when other things are washed. It's inevitable.

Students who leave their dirty dishes in the sink don't have the moral high ground

Perhaps student 1 could have emptied the sink, put the dirty dishes to one side. But no obligation to do that

Leaving dishes piled up in the sink is revolting. It means other people have to move them and probably wash them up before they can prepare their own food or wash their own dishes.
Your daughter (if she's a dish abandoner) and her friends are mingers.

I remember the passive aggressive notes!

I have no idea what the voting means though, as you haven't told us which student is your DD.

The person who left dishes in the sink is in the wrong. Leave them stacked up somewhere else if you don’t want to wash them immediately.
I get that the odd thing needs to soak sometimes but it sounds like this is more than just the one oven dish.

If I was Student 1 I would offer a very simple solution to Student 2: "don't leave your dirty dishes in the sink as by doing so you prevent anyone else from using the sink properly. And it's your problem if your dishes get a bit more manky. You were going to wash them anyway, but by leaving them, you just ensured they got more dirty. Oh, and I am not your Mum/cleaner."

The student who can find the time to write, print and put up an arsey note, but not to wash their plate, is in the wrong.

But the dishes were already dirty? Student 2 is in the wrong.

Student two can’t complain if the dishes they left blocking sink access got a bit dirtier from someone actually using the sink for its intended purpose of washing dishes. What was student one meant to do, wash the pan in the shower? Move everyone else’s dirty stuff?

Student two is doubly unreasonable for leaving a snotty note visible to the entire flat instead of talking to a person she has an issue with.

If student two has a problem with what happened then they need to either wash up immediately or leave their dirty dishes out of everyone else’s way.

They’re all being unreasonable.

People should wash up their dishes after a meal and not leave them in the sink.

And people should clear the sink plug of leftover bits of bolognese, no one wants to be seeing that.

Why not tell us which one is your DD and what you and your DH think is right/wrong?

All the student 1&2 stuff may be an attempt to write it neutrally but that almost always leaves out some nuance.

On the face of it, student 1 is in the right, but I would've thought most adults would think that. So if there's a debate in your house I'm wondering if there's more to it.

I don’t know which one is your dd but highly recommend staying well out of it! This must be an argument that’s had an almost all student households.

But in this case, student 2's dirty dishes were blocking access to the sink. You can't clean the plug when the sink is full of dishes.

Weren't the dishes in the sink dirty anyway?
Everyone should clean up after themselves but how can someone who left dirty dishes complain that they were dirtier?

Student 2 ibu