Skinny shaming is so accepted

[chickenbhunalambbhunaprawnbhunamuchroomrice]

I know a lot of people will disagree with me on this, but skinny shaming is so wildly accepted and tolerated due to slim people being at an advantage due to their body size. As if it's acceptable, because they're slim. I've been body shamed my whole life for being slim. Right from when I was at junior school, to now at 30 years old.

I was relentlessly bullied at school and college. I am not an anomaly, I am a 5'5 size 6-8 female with a normal BMI. I don't need to be shamed about my body. The only people who have ever shamed or bullied me about my weight have been fat or obese people. And I'll be honest I'm trying my hardest not to judge them for their eating habits and size, but when it's a running theme I am starting to think that only fat people have a problem with slim people.

'Skinny privilege' shouldn't be an excuse to exempt bullying and shameful behaviour.
Stop trying to normalise skinny shaming just because it's the 'more desirable' image. It's not our fault that agenda has been pushed so much.

AIBU to think that skinny shaming is just as bad as fat shaming, and that slim people aren't to an advantage on this? I don't believe in the whole 'well at least you're skinny and being shamed.' Interested to know others thoughts.

Bullying is wrong regardless.

No one should bully but yabu because fat people get it in the neck a magnitude of times more.
/ neither slim nor obese here

If youre happy with your body, ignore it

I am 49 and have always been slim (once I was out of my 20s this became harder to maintain without eating well and moving lots) but certainly as a teen/very young woman I was very slim, in fact skeletal looking in some pics of when I was a kid but it was absolutely my natural build.

I was bullied at school and then as a teen and young woman going into work received lots of snide comments regarding my weight (almost exclusively from other women).

So yes, skinny shaming is definitely a thing, definitely feels shit and isn't acceptable in the same way as fat shaming isn't acceptable.

How do you 'shame' someone for being the cultural ideal? What is there to be shamed about? Isn't that what we're all told to aspire to?

Fat people get WAAAAAY more hate than skinny people. WAAAAAY more. Even when someone is painfully thin due to eating disorders, or genetics, they will get sympathy rather than the hate fat people get.

It's not even remotely comparable.

YANBU.

It's sometimes your own family too, due to their own insecurities.

Getting told I "lost all my boobs" after going from obese to a healthy weight.

There remains a spectre of anorexia in pop culture and media but the biggest threat by a country mile, is the levels of obesity we're seeing.

YANBU. The responses show why it happens.

I understand fat shaming, but what is skinny shaming ? Is it people telling you you're too slim? Why would you feel shame for being slim? Or is it people think you're too slim/skinny?

This. I think being fat is the last taboo. Even when you are trying to access medical treatment,it affects medical professionals opinion of you,you are far less likely to be taken seriously.

Do fat people get it more though because it's much more common? Most people are fat are obese.

I've said multiple times that body shaming shouldn't be accepted, that goes for any weight. Just because fat people get it 'more' it doesn't discredit what thin people are subjected to.

Do you actually feel shame though? I don't, it doesn't matter what the comment is. At worst it's wrapped up as a snide/back handed compliment and I either shrug it off or sweetly say thank you. It's such a non issue. No slim person feels ashamed for being slim.

Well, that makes it okay then.

As I said above, perhaps fat shaming is seen as 'more' because most people are fat.

It's not a non issue.

I don’t think it’s ok to just tell OP that fat people have it worse so it’s not bad for her. This analogy doesn’t work. All bullying is bad. It’s not a competition. It is true that it happens and most people who are slim will tell you that they endure very frequent comments about what they look like and what they eat. It’s not socially acceptable to ask a larger person what they eat, so I do not agree that fat people have it worse 100% of the time - 2 things can be true at the same time. People who are thin are told to eat more and people who are fat are told to eat less.

I have lost weight and people have asked me about saggy skin, what I eat, my boobs, made comments about my face - none of which ever happened to me when I was fat in all honesty. I felt self conscious fat but no one commented on it that much

I hate the comparison of skinny shaming to fat shaming because - whilst neither is acceptable - one also comes with privilege. There is no 'fat privilege' and surely you must realise that you are allowed to eat in public and wear whatever clothes you want without the visceral attacks that larger people get.

Of course, no one should be made to feel less or othered, but being slim/skinny in this day and age is far, far easier than being fat. There is no comparison.

I’m experiencing this after losing some weight. I was always very slim until I got pregnant. I lost it all a few years later and gained and have lost it all again and more now over the course of the summer and I’m about at my adult lightest and have noticed comments and looks from men, women at work and some family. Some very personal and rather rude as though there’s something wrong with me. I wouldn’t dream of being that outspoken to anyone in the manner it’s been relayed to me. I think maybe as they don’t see it as being a stigma then it’s ok to have a free for all about it 🤷🏻‍♀️ I just respond with ‘oh you think so!’ then remain silent and walk away.

Shaming anyone for something like being underweight, or low end of healthy, or being overweight or obese is stupid and cruel. It's not a competition between which is worse.

I'm obese, I've had things shouted at me in the street from men driving past, many many times. It's not any better than women making snide comments about you being too slim, and doesn't stop me being able to empathise with you for being bullied.

I think this is very much true across the population, fat people definitely get a harder time. But on an individual level people can absolutely be relentlessly criticized for being skinny to a level that can match fat-hate. I've watched it happen to women where something about their extreme skinniness seems to mean that a near endless stream of people feel entitled to comment in a negative way - literally all day everyday with multiple shop workers, strangers in the street, teachers, even 'friends' being catty. It was eye opening. So on an individual level it's impossible to say who has it worse as its down to that person's environment.

You're right.
It's not seen as something that should upset you.
You're slim which is desirable therefore other people's nasty comments shouldn't bother you.

But when someone is saying something that they intend in a snide way then of course it hurts!

I'm fat as fuck and I would never make spiteful comments about or to a slim person . It's rude.

If you hate being fat so much that it causes you to lash out at slim people then put down the fork and shut your mouth.

That way you can neither chew nor make nasty comments. 😁

What's skinny shaming? During PE in the changing rooms having a group of girls hide your clothes so you're standing there in your underwear having taken off your PE kit, and then laughing at your 'twiglet legs.'
Choosing to have a salad for lunch in the canteen at school, being told I was 'making others feel uncomfortable by my lifestyle choices.'
Being told I look like a roadmap with visible 'speed bumps' when people were seeing my collar bones through my skin, when I was actually having chemotherapy at 23 due to cancer.
Being told at the age of 12 I would never succeed in being a gymnast as I don't have the 'structure' to take the injuries.
Being called a rake.
Being told my pregnancy wasn't a 'proper pregnancy' and I must've been 'starving my unborn baby' due to the fact I had a small bump. She came out at 7lb 4oz.
Being told I would be blown away by the wind.
Scoffed at and having an audience when I ate a cookie at a work place as everyone thought I either don't eat, or only eat leaves.
Being accused of being bulimic, when in actual fact me puking in the toilet was due to me just having had a round of chemo.

I could go on forever. But there's a few. But these are all fine and acceptable, as 'at least I was slim.' So many on here have proven my point already.

May I add, at all stages in life I have always been a healthy weight, never had an underweight or low BMI.

There isnt much of you, you need to eat a burger, I prefer women with a more "womanly figure", assuming you are on heroin etc. It's hardly complimentary.

Honestly, I don't understand how you can't understand it. Look at the horrible articles about Kate Moss, she gets the blame for eating disorders.

I felt it most early 20s from other women, almost like a way to single me out as "not a proper woman" so comments like -

Seriously love you need to put some weight on

Skinny Cow (said in a jovial yet sneery way)

God I can see your ribs

You've got nothing for him to grab on to

Do you ever eat?

And I can see that the skinny thing can come with a privilege but this almost makes it acceptable to do. As if it's treatment from some other women you have to suck up because you are thinner.

I've commented above as to why I felt shame.

Fucking hell.
Anyone who thinks any of that is acceptable is a grade A cunt.

I'm sorry you have been treated like that.