To think parents nowadays are just weak

[Alberta56]

Not sure is it just me but I feel like most parents are just soft and incapabble to discipline their own kids. I constantly see topics here and not only about small kids doing what they want - screaming, tantrums, wanting stuff and parents are just so helpless. When I go on the tube kids screaming putting their dirty feet on the seats. At home kids not wanting to eat and parents act like they own a restaurant immediately cooking something else. What's wrong with saying NO, or ""keep quiet" or " you eat whats available or "you go and play alone while mommy reads a book for 1 h". Why are parents constantly trying to keep kids entertained and spend a fortune on stupid activities. Worst thing is that I see young colleagues 18/ 19 years old coming to work and are just incapable of being a human - constantly late, all the time have to think about their feelings and emotions can't even complain to HR when they're not doing their job properly....I just don't get it really. I'm about to be a mom myself and if I need i will discipline my kid with firm approach non of that " let them express themselves" cr@p.

My point was that mine did. They were perfectly happy to play for a bit while I did something else or lay on the sofa. And they certainly didn’t need a snack or a drink every few minutes.

I think people’s expectations of what small children can do are very low these days.

I can't believe you are bragging about laying on the sofa while toddlers play alone.
That sounds incredibly lazy to me.

What’s lazy about it? Mine was happy for long periods if he had drawing or painting materials, completely engrossed. Was I lazy because I encouraged it? Time was when they played alone most of the time without adult intervention and were none the worse for it.

You’d leave a two year old unattended with paints while you napped?

Never happened.

Maybe it's the way the post was written, but the image of a parent laying on the sofa for long stretches while a 2 year old amuses themselves just doesn't seem right. At that age most kids want interaction, it's how they learn.

No, you’re right, it never happened. Because I never mentioned napping. You made that up.

Ok I assumed you napped on the sofa. But you’d lay on the sofa leaving them unsupervised with paint?

Pahahahaha if there's paint involved I'm literally on damage limitation.
Your standards would have to be very very low to allow a toddler to be unsupervised with paint 😂😂😂

I could see them so they weren’t unsupervised. You made that up too.

TBH I don't ever remember my parents "playing" with me as a child. Nor was it so totally expected to do so when mine were young. I. Do remember having to occupy myself in my mums days off while she did housework

I'm not sure all this having to spend so much time " playing' with kids is a good thing They don't seem to be able to occupy the themselves at all

Maybe I had a trustworthy toddler rather than low standards.

Oh yep all those untrustworthy toddlers 😂😂😂
Maybe you stay in fantasy land and the rest of us in the real world will give our 2 year olds some attention

That really isnt supervising a two year old with paint. Your reflexes can’t be that fast.

That’s watching from a distance.

It’s supervising. All toddlers aren’t the same. Who knew?

Maybe it is location or people’s snap perceptions but I don’t see half the things that people talk about on MN. I don’t see tons of kids misbehaving and their parents just leaving them to it. Yes, you have the few odd ones that don’t discipline their children, but I see more parents shouting at their kids and telling them off for very minor things where they aren’t mature enough or old enough to understand and/or do a certain behaviour. I still see way more adults who should know better misbehaving and getting a pass and excuses made for them than children who are still learning and developing.

Well clearly yours must have had outstanding motor skills and impulse control for you to have watched them painting from the comfort of a sofa!

But at least you’ve finally admitted that not all children are the same

I never said they were. Your facility for making stuff up is outstanding.

Yeah OP I was all “kids are too loud and I will do this and do that when I’m a parent”. Now I am a parent and I realise how fucking hard it is and I have a lot more empathy!

You basically have no idea yet. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you know how to be a better parent when you’ll just have to muddle through like the rest of us.

Exactly this.

Yes, kids learn from the ‘serve and return’ they get when interacting with a parent. But it is also incredibly beneficial for them to play without constant attention. It’s how they learn to be self-sufficient, creative and resilient.

My kids aren’t tiny any more, but from what I see of (many) families with small children these days the kids are constantly entertained, either through constant attention from the parent or a screen.

They never learn to amuse themselves, which is why I think there are the people on this thread who simply can’t believe a 2yo is capable of playing by themselves.

Honestly. It’s not only possible, it’s normal. It’s just we’ve stopped letting them do it. And rather than being neglectful, it actually benefits them.

One of the things that brought me the most joy when my DC1 was little was watching her totally engrossed in something that I wasn’t involved in.

Of course they get engrossed in things. I think though there is a difference between this and a 2 year old playing with paint while a parent lies back on the sofa. Honestly that's just ridiculous.

Is everything outside your experience ridiculous? My toddler wasn’t playing with paint, he was painting supervised from the other side of the room. Incidentally, he’s got a Fine Art degree now.

Given that your son was 2 something like 20 years ago, I'm thinking it's more likely that you are slightly misremembering things than him knocking out works of art unsupervised.
Will check in with my parents though, maybe I did make my solo debut age 25 months and forgot. I've got a music degree, incidentally.

Parents today are full of excuses as to why their offspring is badly behaved. The purpose of having children is to transform babies into fully-functioning adults ready to make their own way in the world.

I didn’t say he was knocking out works of art unsupervised. I said he painted under supervision. The lack of comprehension on this thread is rivalled only by the capacity for invention. We’ve moved from playing with paint to creating works of art in two posts.