..To be mortified at the treatment of rape victims at the Edinburgh Rape Crisis Centre?

[TorghunKhan]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/clynyky7kj9o

No women only spaces for 16 months. Basically women, RAPED women - were told they could not definitely see a woman to help them with such an awful crime, they might have to see a man in a dress, and if they objected they were to be 're eductaed' by the man in charge - a man who himself applied for, and got!! a job which was supposed to be only filled by a woman.

It's shameful, disgusting, but whats worse is how many people put up with it!! Who thought this was ok?! why did nobody do anything, or say anything FOR YEARS

Which you appear to have done without demonstrating empathy or understanding for female victims whilst at the same time demanding it for your son.

Hypocritical at best

You're the mother of a raped son.

This is an issue concerning women who have been raped.

Women. Not men. WOMEN.

You'd think

It's not a topic I know anything about.

Nope not upset. A Mumsnet thread is not upsetting. Seeing your child denied much needed support because of gender is upsetting.

All you male apologist who want males to be allowed into female rape centres please read of Aruna an Indian rape victim who would react in terror to male voices even while in a coma and hang your heads in shame.

Female rape victims can have a visceral reaction to males and are deserving of male free spaces to recover.

Males need their own facilities. Not ours.

www.thehindu.com/opinion/letters/Aruna-Shanbaug/article59872104.ece/amp/

In that case, you're unnecessarily upsetting other rape victims.

Have you stopped to think that there are actual female rape victims on this thread that are finding your comments upsetting?

@Saind3rs

Nope not upset. A Mumsnet thread is not upsetting.

Im finding your "what about the menz " rhetoric on a thread about females traumatised by males in rape centres to be very upsetting. It's really not the place. Shame on you.

Of course women should have access to women’s only spaces and women only staff, and that should of course be available to them all day, every day. Equally of course men who have been raped should access to a space and counselling service all day every day. A victim is a victim. It’s absolutely wrong that raped women have to campaign for this. It’s also wrong that raped men should have to either, 2 wrongs won’t make a right, a victim is a victim. A suitable service for anyone that needs it, but separate male and female buildings, that’s what is needed and should be obvious to those in power.

Exactly this!

Yes utterly appalling. Just shows the sheer contempt Wadhwa has for women however it's the other women employees that went along with this I can't get my head around.

I know a couple maybe were just out of a certain captured university and had limited experience but where is the humanity and compassion? Just because they didn't subscribe to a ridiculous ideology that everyone is now seeing for what it actually is. I see the resident TWAW posters are staying particularly quiet 🙄

This post was started about a female issue though?

Females are disadvantaged and denied many things because of their sex. Hence this post.

What are you hoping to achieve by constantly pushing your sons issues on a post that is about an issue affecting women?

A lot of this has been covered in numerous threads on FWR.

At the time MW was appointed many women put in formal complaints to the ERCC, to Scotland's charity overseeing group, Scottish policians etc.. At that time (and now) most funding came via the SNP who were totally TWAW and implied if women's groups didn't accept TW they would lose their funding.

And in fact Rape Crisis Scotland as the federation lead group in Scotland did nothing.

And this is also going in in England, Wales and Scotland.

Labour has now got a woman to be chair of the Women and Equalities Committee who thinks TWAW.

The ERHC has recently issued guidelines that say categorically it is possible to advertise a job as being women only and include TW, although it is also possible to advertise a job as being women only but mean only those who are biologically female. If our laws are that confusing is it any wonder that some groups just lose touch with their founding principles.

It will only change when more are as brave as Roz Adams the ERCC employee who challenged, (NB not that TW worked at the centre) that she was forbidden to tell a potential user that some service provision would be from TW.

So even though many of us are outraged, upset, concerned, it wont change until more women who feel that women deserve women only services (ie same sex - biological reality) are directly involved.

If the only one giving out funding, asking for funding, providing services dont think there is a problem with TW in women's support services it wont change.

And dont forget there is a whole new generation coming into adulthood who all think talking and worrying about sex being a biological reality are just out of date dinasours.

Because separate buildings and equal services are hugely important and part of the discussion.

I don't think you understand what happened at Edinburgh Rape Crisis which is why you are here derailing the thread with a completely unrelated argument.

No one thinks men should not have access to rape crisis services.

Because separate buildings and equal services are hugely important and part of the discussion.

They are important but they are not part of this discussion.

We are talking about females traumatised by males in a rape crisis centre.

Shame on you expecting empathy when you clearly have none.

Again, as you appear to be hard of understanding.

Not once has anyone on here said that men don't deserve or need their own space after being raped. No one

This post was started about an issue in a rape support centre that directly affects women.

It doesn't require the input of anyone who decides to bleat on on about how men deserve better too and not just women.

It's not the time or place and I can reassure you that the patriarchy won't crumble to dust because "what about men" hasn't been included in a conversation

It seems to me that the vast majority of rape victims, male or female, would want separate sex services.

I can't really see who it benefits to mix the two and change the meanings of words so 'women's only' or even 'men's only' means mixed sex.

Actually, I can see who it benefits, and it's not the victims.

The lack of self awareness posting on a thread about males being where they're not wanted trying to shove males into a conversation where they're not wanted is quite breathtaking.

Exactly!

I'm so sorry about your son and can feel your distress and anger but you're having a go at the wrong people.
Do you understand how these centres developed? In the 1970's groups of women came together to provide voluntary free services to other women because the state wasn't doing anything (rape within marriage was legal until 1992). They had nothing except the power to support each other. Over time they became charities, scrabbled about for bits of funding to employ a few trained counsellors. They did it because no one else was doing anything and they did it to meet a need where the state provided nothing. These are not services designed by or for men and there was never the intention to provide services for men. Yes, it's appalling that you're child can't access support but that's an argument to be had with the government not an excuse to encroach on women's spaces that women have created for themselves.

No it's not. That's not why this thread was started.

I suggest you read the OP again

You didn't need to "fight or campaign" because the women before you had already done it. Who do you think set up women's aid and rape crisis?
Isn't it funny how men don't campaign for these services for other men?
When men are the ones doing the raping there is no place for men in a woman's rape crisis group. It doesn't matter if they claim to be "living as a woman"
They are not women

Its sickening. Wasn’t it this week that Labour said they won’t address the issue in the Equality Act with the definition of legal sex?

I just don’t understand how Starmer & Dodds can’t look at cases like this one which demonstrate the importance of clarity for women. Honestly shameful. The likes of Wadwha are legitimised by politicians.

No need for the rude response really but ok. My response is in regards to those suggesting her son should campaign for the space he needs because women have had to. No victim should have to campaign for anything.