To go after my ex for half his inheritance

[spanieleyes22]

So we split 15 years ago. 2 ds. They are with me. He did see them on weekends when they were small. He moved back in wit his mother and used take them there at weekends. Usually one nite. Not every weekend. He's been sporadic with maintenance. Had to take him to court at the beginning. Sometimes he pays it sometimes he doesn't. He doesn't see them now. They don't really have a relationship with him despite my best efforts. His mother has now died and it looks like he will inherit her house. Probably he won't get a huge amount as there are a lot of siblings. We never actually divorced. I tried a few years ago to do a diy one but he was slow signing the papers and in the end life took over and I let it go. Friends and family are saying to me I should get half his inheritance. I would feel bad though trying to get it. In the same way he could get half of anything I might inherit. My parents are well though so they will be around for a good while yet. Wwyd. Leave him be or. In one way I would do it for the dc to help them out. I don't want anything from him I hate him 🤣but he won't give the ex anything he just won't I know what he's like. So I could do it for them. They have no relationship with him anyway so I wouldn't be messing anything up for them .

Completely different, she has raised the children with virtually no support from him. She owes him nothing.

He owes her 15 years of maintenance.

This may very well be legally true but if you've been living separately for 15 years you're not spouses in anything but the technical sense. That's why it feels grabby.

I'd never allow myself to get into this situation but if a distant ex somehow managed to take thousands of my inheritance it'd be war. I'm talking slingshot/ballbearings and take out all their car/house windows from afar at 3am. Time and time again. I'm not even joking.

I would seriously consider whether it would be worth the repercussions, because he will never get over this. He'll have it in for you forever.

Inheritance is ring fenced. Been said a few times now. Unless he inherited before they split it isn’t a marital asset, so she has no claim.

The law is open to interpretation and nothing is binding. She has a claim.

No I wouldn’t. Not to be harsh but even well people could die in an accident etc. How would you feel if something happened to your parents and he went after your inheritance. You need to get a divorce and sort maintenance out properly.

However as previously said, best course of action is probably to go for amicable divorce. And thereafter go after child maintenance.

Because they are still legally married.

You could contact him and tell him you won't put in a claim against his inheritance in return for him paying the £600 for the divorce.

And also, they are still married.

I'd go after every penny you can from the inheritance, if you're entitled as he hasn't paid his way for his own kids! About time he did.

I think you should claim part of the inheritance for your children, like put in an account on their names. That way you don't have to fight over it for yourself, what your ex probably would refuse anyway. And yes, do get that divorce!

Thats not true. A married partner dosent inherit debts when their partner dies, but might be expected to use some of their partners estate to pay for them, if there is an estate. Other wise it gets written off. I know this from when my friends husband died in debt, because they lived in rented accomodation, there was no estate so got written off.

If the inheritance was received before or during the marriage it would be considered a marital asset and OP would have a claim. Because it’s been received after they separated, as a starting point it’s ring fenced and not treated as a marital asset. So OP would have no claim unless she could demonstrate to the court that her needs were greater than her ex’s and that there weren’t enough marital assets available in the settlement to meet both their needs. I don’t know how she would do this after being separated for so long, and l think a better bet is to start divorce proceedings with a clean financial break so that neither party has any future claim on the other, then sort out maintenance.

Get maintenance sorted and get divorced - before the arse comes after anything you might inherit !!

Yep. If the debt is in sole name then property or bank accounts held in joint name can’t be used to pay off the debt. So for example, if the late Fred Bloggs had a credit card in his sole name, but everything else - house, bank accounts, are in joint name, the debt will be written off. But if the late FB had his own bank account any funds there would be used towards the debt.

Ordinarily I'd say don't be grabby, but for an asshole who would see his children go without, go for it 🤷🏾‍♀️. If it doesn't work, then so be it.

And divorce the that ASAP.

It doesn't sound like you really have a claim, but regardless I don't think you should go after his inheritance.
If you do, maybe add a binding condition (if possible) that means you can't access the money and it will be in DC's names, for them and only them to access when old enough.

I imagine you've been separated far too long to be entitled to any inheritance that he's now come into.

Any money he inherits will be part of the Financial matters alongside your divorce.
He could have made sure you are divorced.
He didn't so technically his inheritance will now be part of the financial pie.

Good luck.

Sorry but my DH is a barrister and lawyer
and says them being separated is completely irrelevant. They are still legally married.

He hasn’t separated from his children. They are still his children. He hasn’t been paying to support them. To say OP isn’t entitled to his money is ridiculous - she 100% is.

However disclaimer OP **I am not giving you legal advice, my DH isn’t a divorce lawyer. He specialises in something else. But yes see a solicitor, you have a case.

So he’s paid nothing for the upbringing of his children. Hell yeah. Go for half of the inheritance and put it in trust for your children or support them through uni with it.

You've been separated for 15 years. You'd be hard pushed for a court to consider his inheritance a marital asset as it wasn't part of the 'money pot' when you split up, despite there being no financial order / divorce in place.

Such nonsense being spouted. If someone doesn't get half the inheritance when they are married at the time of death and when it is paid out then the OP won't get it when split for 15 years before the death!