To make a birthday cake and not cut it

[Miaowm]

I want to make my daughter’s birthday cake as I do every year. This is the first year she will
be having a party with friends and family at a venue. I wanted to take the cake for singing and then hand out matching cupcakes. Is this out of order?
A couple of reasons for this, not really anywhere suitable to cut the cake at the venue and I really don’t want a cake I’ve spent ages on to be crushed in a party bag then thrown away

We've been to lots of parties like this. Either get a cupcake in the party bag or cut a "cheap" cake.

It's the OP who "cares". Most of us are saying the quality of cake doesn't really matter. If youve made a lovely cake then serve it . Or bring cupcakes or a bought cake.
The odd part is to bring a fancy cake for display purposes only

I think it's odd. If they're just getting a random piece of cake or birthday cake why bother? Give them proper birthday cake or don't show them the cake

I don't think this is unreasonable at all, but do you need/want to do a big cake? Cupcakes with a letter on each one ranged on a tray to say "happy birthday" or themed icing/motive etc on each one.

Make another cake that you cut and wrap for party bags at home, but which looks a bit like the real cake once cut. No one will move if you take it away, put the lid on and appear with cake in party bags to take home.

The guests aren't good enough to eat the nice cake? But you can't resist showing it off in front of them, gloatingly. Look at this beautiful cake we have, sorry you're not having any. Great way to insult all your guests I think

This. Surely the primary function of a party cake at a party, is to be eaten by the party guests? Surely its role as a photographic prop hasn't overtaken its role as something nice to eat?

I think showing kids a cake they aren't allowed to eat is mean-spirited.

Just sing around whatever cake or cupcakes you are happy to hand out and leave the cake you don't want to share at home.

Back in the 1960's my little sister had a cake made for her 7th? birthday. It was iced to look like a pink woven basket with an opened lid. A selection of Quality St sweets were placed to look as though they were tumbling out of the basket.
My sister absolutely refused to have the cake cut and it was kept for weeks, like some ancient artefact.

Fast forward to the same sisters 60th birthday, and I had the cake replicated, and this time I made sure I had a slice!
God that cake was so retro!

If the children are eating foot at the venue then there'll be a table, so somewhere to cut the cake.

I cut a birthday cake up at the end of a table in pizza express yesterday- it was fine.

Take the cake you're happy for your guests to eat. Not sure why they're not good enough for your cake though?

What a lovely idea! I bet she was so chuffed with that.

Just put the cupcakes on the table and sing and blow out candles on them. Otherwise you've literally just created a cake to show people you can create a fancy cake.

Here’s what you could have won.

I always make one and send guests home with pieces of it. Why do I need a whole massive cake back at home with me? Much rather spread the joy and give it out. Cake in party bags never gets put in bin in our house - gobbled on the car ride home usually.

I think it’s tight. What’s the point of a cake if you’re not going to let the guests eat it.
I’ve also been to a few weddings recently with a very fancy cake that was never seen again after the photos.

I thought the whole point of the cake was to SHARE it

Well cupcakes are fine but what are you going to do with all the other cake??

Yes me too.

Just have a different cake. You can't present a cake and then say the guests might not appreciate it so they can't have any.

Either serve the cake or don't bother making it. The kids do generally eat it. How about serving it to eat at the party? I've done this rather than in the bags for every party I hosted

Sorry OP, I think this is totally weird and you’re massively missing the point of a child’s birthday cake.

It’s for the kids to look at, think ‘oh wow look birthday cake’ and then they get to eat the cake. For you to not give them a cake is odd - what are you doing, taking it home for older relatives and not the kids??! And to show them it and then give them a supermarket slice in a bag is also weird (and as a parent I would think pretty rude)

if you’re determined just to keep the best cake for your immediate family and not your child’s friends then just display and serve it at home and display and serve a different one at your child’s actual birthday party. Bonkers.

🤣🤣

OP I completely understand this. I also put a lot of effort in my kids birthday cakes and basically only really want to share it with my kids and family.

Take a shop bought cake to the party and save the one you're going to make for home. No-one will care or even know.

If you're doing a large-ish party it absolutely makes sense to have cake wrapped, in party bags, in advance. I get/make a slab of cake (just icing on the top). It's a lot easier than taking the cake with candles back to the kitchen, cutting and wrapping it while running a party. I wouldn't do this if the cake would be eaten at the party or if a very small group.

This is soo lovely of you!

I mean, yes the kids all get cake, no harm done but IMO it makes you look a bit brittle and odd needing to have your cake admired then spiriting it away again.

If there's somewhere to rest it, there's somewhere to cut it. Or light candles on a stack of fairy cakes for the party.

I'd say one or the other.