To make a birthday cake and not cut it

[Miaowm]

I want to make my daughter’s birthday cake as I do every year. This is the first year she will
be having a party with friends and family at a venue. I wanted to take the cake for singing and then hand out matching cupcakes. Is this out of order?
A couple of reasons for this, not really anywhere suitable to cut the cake at the venue and I really don’t want a cake I’ve spent ages on to be crushed in a party bag then thrown away

Sounds fine to me ! Make sure they are nice cupcakes though!

Done this before after being to a few parties that had done the same. I think it’s coming more common. Some do cupcakes and other do another other the cake pre sliced without the decoration.

So you literally can't have your cake and eat it

Party cake boxes
https://amzn.eu/d/h7iXZuG

The point of a birthday cake isn’t to stand there admiring it and feeling like a magnificent mummy. Just let the kids eat the cake!

We went to a party where they did this. My 4 year old did ask why we didn't get to eat the big cake, but he wasn't complaining as the cupcakes in the party bag were delicious.

We have always served cake at the venue, but if you can't do that I'd get little cake boxes so it won't get squashed. Personally I wouldn't take cake and not serve it.

I would think it was super weird to sing haply birthday, see the candles being blown and then the cake being taken away. To be fair, the cake in a bag is not a done thing here either.

Just have the cupcakes at the party and blow one candle. Do the cake at home with family.

Son loves a cake at a party, and was cross when this happened once, he was 6 or 7.
Loves cake

This.

It's really, really rude and bad hosting to invite people to a party and then show them food that you are not going to give them.

If you don't want to serve the cake to the people at your party, don't show it off to them.

By all means do buns or a supermarket cake for the party, and the fancy homemade one for home. But don't bring it if you're not serving it.

I know it's only a kids' party, but I admit I think it's really rude and weird to bring a cake to a party and then not serve it.

I'm amazed so many people care!

The cake usually got binned with my kids, maybe we're just not birthday cake people

Succinctly said!

Spot on.

"not really anywhere suitable to cut the cake at the venue"

What on earth is the venue?

I've cut birthday cakes out in the park on the grass, on the floor, in a forest around a camp fire, in soft plays with kids swarming around etc.

I can't think of a venue where you wouldn't be able to cut a cake.

I just think it's really precious and pretty embarrassing to be so precious about cake. I don't care if the cake I've lovingly made ends up eaten or squished and eaten or squished and forgotten and thrown away. Or if anyone admires it.

It's just cake. Make it, serve it, get over it.

So it's a performance cake then?

Looks good in pictures and for show but not for sharing.

If it's not for eating cake, then it shouldn't be anywhere people might expect to eat it.

Does seem a bit weird if the cake will be there but none of the children will get any- just keep it for home/family or let them have it. The best party cake I ever saw tbh was someone had made a 'caterpillar' out of supermarket doughnuts, they could then just be given out or popped into bags without any cutting and everyone loved them (cheap too- 12 for £2 in some supermarkets).

Why not serve the cake at the party? I have 3 dc and they have never been to a party where the cake was sent home in a party bag.

I know from posts on here that it seems to be the done thing in England though. It makes no sense as it's just going to end up squashed and inedible.

When is the "good" cake actually going to be eaten then? Are you saving it for home?

I wouldn't let party guests look at a nice cake but not actually eat it. That's frankly a bit strange.

If you have to have different cskes, I think a supermarket cake for the party but having the special cake at home makes more sense.

Right?! I've never experienced it either. Makes no sense.

I always make two cakes- a traybake which I cut up and put in the party bags and a cake with candles which I hand out at the party. It's weird to not share the birthday cake you made- who is going to eat it?

I found that any cake, fancy, simple, home made or shop bought, at this age group won't really be eaten. Regardless if you give it out with the party bags or serve it at the party.

Just get a simple one or some cupcakes, put a candle in one and sing Happy Birthday. Then discard the remains with the other rubbbish.

If you want a lovely cake for you family party then keep it at home and don't bring it out for sining.

I so don’t get this weird untouchable cake fetishism. Why toil over a cake if you don’t want it cut or eaten? If you want something indestructible to commemorate the day, why not make a statue?

I think this is a bit odd tbh. Would your daughter not want her friends and family to taste the delicious, beautiful cake her Mum has made - is that not what a birthday cake is for, to share with friends and family? I think it's a bit sad.

I doubt anyone would care one way or the other, but I'd save myself the trouble of bringing the cake (risking something happening to it every time it's moved) and just serve the cupcakes at the party. Save the nice cake for your family at home.