Would you go nc with your parents for this

[giantcolouringbook]

I am 23(f) and work f/t my company have been offering compresses hours which I have happily accepted bearing in mind I get paid the same and do the same hours but an extra day off plus weekends.
I excitedly told my parents this and they are furious saying that I should have discussed it with them first as it affects them too.
They've also said if I'm going to be home an extra day of in the week I need to do something with it and not just hang around the house.
My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing.
Aibu to think a) this has nothing to do with them and b) I shouldn't be told to go out and do something when I am looking forward to an extra down day at home doing exactly what my dad does?
I am of course looking to move out asap but would you think there was any coming back from this or should I just move on never look back.

So true.

Whilst I understand the financial reasons for adult children living at home for longer, it does mean that some people don't actually grow up, which is why you have 23 year olds having teenage strops.

That's why it impacts him. You'll be there all day.

You still haven't answered the questions about why you haven't moved out.

You're 23, unless there's a huge backstory you're perfectly able to move out and live independently.

You're living in THEIR house, so they have their rules - I doubt very much you're unwelcome as such, but I also wonder if they're probably thinking the same as a lot of us.

Move out!

So be a grown up and move out

Nothing screams unwelcome more than hearing the horror of your daughter being around a bit more though.

You're probably not all that welcome their anymore though. That's the harsh reality.

They've been looking forward to the day you finally move put and get on with your own life and have presented them with the opposite - a whole extra day when you're going to be in the house!

They are retired - it makes sense they would want to just potter around their home all day.

You are 23, is there not more you want to do with another day off, than just sit around your parents house?

Yes time to get serious about moving on

They are being weird and unreasonable with regards to your work hours and down time. As such, I think it's probably time to think about leaving their home.

No Contact, however, would be a very extreme reaction to the whole thing by you. It's intended for people suffering from very toxic abusive relations, and unless there's much more to this story, would be unnecessary and costly.

It's probably enough for you to get out from under their roof and see them only when you want. They may even be hinting at that.

You would seriously stop talking to your parents because of this? You sound very immature!

Your dad is clearly set in his ways and likes his peace and quiet. Going NC is overly dramatic but you should be trying to at least find a house share I think.

I think you'll struggle to go no contact living in the same house.

Don't be absurd. This is not something to go NC with your parents for. I'm not happy about my own DS working 3 days a week but he doesn't live with me so it's not causing any extra expense or hassle here so we don't talk about it.
Maybe they are anxious about increased bills and food costs and loss of personal privacy. Young people forget older people still have their own lives and different generational attitudes about work.
Try having an honest conversation with them.
I am NC with my parents because they crossed a line - sexual and emotional abuse. This is the type of thing you go NC with your parents for.

You are 23.
I'm 45.
Looking back now, I don't think it's an extreme reaction and after you secure your own life
(living space, work), yes I would go no contact.

Grow up and move out, you have a full time job so are clearly a capable adult... why are you still under their feet to the point they have to straight up spell it out for you?

This is a joke right

a) this has nothing to do with them

Course it does. You live with them. Clearly time to move out, but not fall out. It's time.

I would use the extra day off a week to do something constructive to limit my time living with parents.
So, any courses or studying for additional qualifications (use library, or a workplace, or facilities where you can head to to study)
Take a different qualification that could be lucrative eg HGV driving (drivers are in demand and earn good money.
Take on a part time 1 day a week post through an agency perhaps. Save the money for house deposit. I have a friend did this a couple of years ago for an Estate Agent - worked Fridays & Saturday mornings on top of (can't remember if it was condensed or part time) job 4 days elsewhere. Liked it and excelled so is now an EA full time.

Agree

I do understand why it might feel hurtful but not everyone is cut out for multi generational living

Especially when it sounds like you don't really do anything - what's with the "I don't have anywhere to go"? Get a hobby, volunteer, go and visit a museum, basically get out and about

I can understand that this would feel upsetting but never speaking to your parents again over this is certainly an overreaction unless they are abusive. It sounds as though they want to enjoy their retirement alone which is entirely reasonable. It’s time for you to move out so you can both have your own space

Both. This can’t be the only thing I assume? It has nothing to do with them you are right. They can’t make you do anything.

Haha, my dc are still young, but I already know that I would hate them being around the house for an extra day! It's not even personal, I know I would relish my routine and peace and quiet throughout the day. Obviously it's time to move out now.

Going no contact for this is frankly ridiculous. How will you manage it when you're still living in their home for a start?!

Do you think we all own houses?

Of course we know how expensive rent is many of us do it still in our 30s and 40s. We don't just live off parents demanding rights to someone elses house.

Ah so continue benefiting from them while it suits?

Then go NC. They are so awful it’s worth losing the relationship. But not that awful to stay in touch while there’s a direct benefit?

Let’s hope Op doesn’t ever have any problems where she needs to rely on them or want any help from in the future.

Nothing screams unwelcome more than hearing the horror of your daughter being around a bit more though
Nothing screams spoilt brat louder than threatening to go NC with your parents who house you!!