Would you go nc with your parents for this

[giantcolouringbook]

I am 23(f) and work f/t my company have been offering compresses hours which I have happily accepted bearing in mind I get paid the same and do the same hours but an extra day off plus weekends.
I excitedly told my parents this and they are furious saying that I should have discussed it with them first as it affects them too.
They've also said if I'm going to be home an extra day of in the week I need to do something with it and not just hang around the house.
My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing.
Aibu to think a) this has nothing to do with them and b) I shouldn't be told to go out and do something when I am looking forward to an extra down day at home doing exactly what my dad does?
I am of course looking to move out asap but would you think there was any coming back from this or should I just move on never look back.

Do you know what going nc actually means OP?

To be fair it DOES affect them if you’re going to be at home an extra day a week.
There are lots of things they may wish to do with their own time in their own house with no one else around.
You being at home an extra day may mean extra electricity being used etc.
When our adult daughter comes to stay with us we love to see her but the shine wears off quite quickly as we realise we are back to being limited by her presence.

Im not saying you should have asked their permission but it certainly does affect them and if you can’t see that then maybe you need to grow up a bit more and move out quickly.

Sounds like OP has learned to overreact from her parents

If I were the OP, I would be looking to move out and trying to learn how healthy people manage their feelings and emotions.

How can you go NC if you’re still under their roof?
It does seem like very unwarranted interference on their part, but evidently it’s time you moved out anyway.

Because some people are noisy and messy. It means that you can watch the television that you want to. You can't nap. You can't set your own cleaning/showering/getting dressed schedule. If you are all fairly quiet people, who see to yourselves, or you still enjoy looking after them, you might not get it. We don't know what the OP's dad's health is like. She sounds very condescending about his choices in retirement.

Move out

Then you can do what you like

I can't fathom why on earth you want to go no contact with your parents because they've expressed a preference for how things happen IN THEIR OWN HOUSE

And how are you going to go no contact with them anyway, when you're living with them, IN THEIR HOUSE?

I think you might be 23 going on 13 🙄🤣

Grow up ffs!

You and your parents sound quite similar.

i wonder what they do when you are at work that they are so difficult?

Of course not. 😂 But when I was 23 and working full time, I lived on my own with no one to answer to. You should easily have a deposit saved up by now, so just move out.

The parents have understood that and that's why they have kindly let the op stay with them until mid twenties.

That isn't the problem though. The problem is the ops lack of gratitude and entitlement.

A nicer way would have been
'Mum, dad an opportunity has come up at work to consolidate hours which gives me an extra day off. I'd absolutely love to do this, but I know you love your peace dad, so what do you think? Could we work something out?'

As this didn't even cross the ops mind, it gives an insight of the entitlement the parents are enduring.

i am sorry they are so anti
you could have been company for your dad as well

Thank you @Bestyearever2024 for saving me the trouble.

Time to get yourself somewhere else to live.

Like her dad wants her stroppy teenage company!

No contact ?? Wow massive over reaction. Yes they are being unreasonable but this warrants a discussion not alienating your parents for life!

giantcolouringbook
My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing

It is your parents house what he does it up to them.

I wonder how weekends work? Do you help with housework? Do you do your own washing? Do you shop for food and cook some of the meals?

I have adult children living at home, I love them dearly and like a house full of people (not everyone does) but I’m starting to mind that I do the majority of housework whilst they use their time off to chill. I think it’s time they moved out but I know they’ll be upset if I tell them that. And I will miss them when they do but I won’t miss the extra housework and the living room being used for computer games.

Your response is very extreme and honestly comes across as immature.

It sounds as though you moving out might be the best solution for everyone. Staying in your family home as an adult is a privilege. For me, it sounds immature to want to go no contact with your parents just because your dad wants more personal space in his own home.

when you get older your energy levels do drop and you realise it’s a finite supply. From an older person’s point of view, it makes sense to invest that youthful energy into something with a long term benefit. So a course that would improve your prospects, sports that keep your body healthy, extra work that would pay for a deposit on a house etc

A younger person would have probably see it more in terms of the fun they can have.

so they are being old and you are being y young. No need to go NC over t just. Mist young people just do what they want anyway, as will you!

she is 23

Yes, it's a bit teen angst 'mom i hate you, get out of my life, but first give me a ride to the mall with Susie'...

Attitude is teenager level.

op step away from social media and mumsnet
forget about going NC with your parents.

build bridges

Grow up. The world doesn't revolve around you.

My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing

And why shouldn't here.

She's behaving like a teenager

Co-dependence is not something to be wildly proud of.

It so strange people on MN love to brag about their imbalanced relationships with their kids as if being 'six ways to sunday' somehow makes them more loving parents.

They wont if she is NC will they?