Would you go nc with your parents for this

[giantcolouringbook]

I am 23(f) and work f/t my company have been offering compresses hours which I have happily accepted bearing in mind I get paid the same and do the same hours but an extra day off plus weekends.
I excitedly told my parents this and they are furious saying that I should have discussed it with them first as it affects them too.
They've also said if I'm going to be home an extra day of in the week I need to do something with it and not just hang around the house.
My dad is retired and spends every day hanging around the house doing nothing.
Aibu to think a) this has nothing to do with them and b) I shouldn't be told to go out and do something when I am looking forward to an extra down day at home doing exactly what my dad does?
I am of course looking to move out asap but would you think there was any coming back from this or should I just move on never look back.

You're 23 for God's sake! Your parents aren't obliged to give you a home at all at that age. If they appreciate the space your being at work gives them in their own home, that's their right. They've given you a roof over your head you're entire life and now your considering cutting them out of your life over this? Really? I imagine you're quite a difficult person to live with, certainly selfish and ungrateful, and they'd probably be happy for you to move out.

I can see you feel unloved and unwanted by your parents, and I can understand that. My mother (who had always made it clear that I was an accident and a mistake) died when I was 15, so it was just my dad and I then. He tried his best but wasn't the most present father. He too made it clear that I needed to move out as soon as possible, once I was old enough. On the day I moved out, I left him a bottle of champagne to celebrate with! But even through all that, I never even considered for a second going no contact with him! That is an over reaction in the extreme! And one that you would surely come to regret in the future. Yes, their reaction to your new working hours is not normal, and they are out of order, but so is your overreaction. Take a deep breath, count to 100, start looking for your own place and then leave on civil terms. Please don't burn your bridges over something so trivial.

You work full time, it's nothing to do with them.
what you do with your free time as an adult is your own affair.
Discuss this and if they still think they have a right to tell you what to do with your time, I'd strongly consider moving out.
This answer assumes you pay your way though-many parents think to have a say in the lives of their children because they subsidise their rent/food/utilities etc, if this is the case then that is rather different, and negotiations will need to be far more delicate.

Wow. Listen to yourself. Go and fill in your giant colouring book...

They've given her a roof over her head her entire life? You mean like they're legally obligated to do because they're parents and they decided to have kids?

Is this a joke? How can you go non-contact with them if you live with them?! Do you pay rent and contribute towards food/housework etc?

Wow! Your post blows my mind. If you are 23 and working get your own place! Your parents have a right to expect time to themselves when their kids grow up--trouble is, you haven't grown up. Your level of entitlement is crazy. Give your parents a break and move out.

Cringe

I don't how anyone can be this narcissistic and not see it. I have the solution though, you take OP in and be her new adoptive mam and she can mooch off you forever. See if you get pissed off with her under your feet and demanding your attention all the time.

Don't expect comment decency back though when you ask for well deserved space relationship only exist when you can milk the other side dry.

even if she pays she is at best a lodger and they can ABSOLUTELY have rule in their house about what happens in it.

She's not mooching she pays FFS

Why do you hang around at home with your parents when you’re not working?
You sound rather immature and I think you need a house share and to start living a bit - develop interests and friends of your own to hang out with. You can still visit your parents occasionally but not live in their pockets.

@kiwiane why do homebodies get so attacked on here constantly? Along with anyone who dares still live at home past 20. No other lifestyle gets this much criticism. Have 3 kids by 20-great! At least they moved out early 🙄

Breathing down your parents necks isn't a "lifestyle".

Well if she goes NC they won't have to worry about that for long will they...

At 23? Which law school did you go to?

@Pupinskipops 18-23 isn't her "entire life"-given her a roof over her head from age 18 when they weren't obligated to by law would be more accurate. If parents resent housing their kids even up to 18 (and think their kids should be indebted to them for life for it) here's an idea-don't have kids!

OK, if you want to be pedantic, and if you believe that you don't owe your parents even a modicum of respect for the sacrifices they don't have to make for you if they comply with the only basics of their legal requirements prior to 16 (actually) then at the very least the OP was living on her parents' goodwill for almost a third of her life, after they would have legally been able to kick her out if the house.

@Pupinskipops I just don't understand what the problem is-she's intending to move out, she might go NC. And everyone is up in arms despite saying she needs her own life and friends. I'm not a parent so I don't understand what they want or expect.

"They"? Her parents? Parents in general?

There's no point in rehashing here why people are gobsmacked that the OP would be asking if it's appropriate to cut her parents out of her life because they want to enjoy their space quietly, as older people (retired, I think?) after a lifetime of work and caring for their daughter beyond what most parents do, on the basis that her father doesn't do anything anyway as a retired person except watch TV and garden (shock, horror!)

If you don't get it then, weirdly, you don't get it. 🤷🏼‍♀️

@Pupinskipops well maybe after she's moved out she should just communicate with them by email so as not to disturb her dad's quiet time 😆 Just think how much quiet time they could've had if they hadn't had kids in the first place...

Thank God you're not a parent.

And I'm very glad you're not mine

On that we can agree

@Pupinskipops if they don’t want to spend time with her though surely the kindest thing to do would be to give them exactly all the space they want. trust me after years and years and years of trying on my end to keep up relationships on my end with some family members i now learned to in future give the same energy back. maybe nc or lc is what ops parents want seeing as they want to spend no time with her at all

Just stay out of your dads way, and look for another place to live.